<p>I support the zero tolerance policy.</p>
<p>Although my daughter is mature and sensible at 15, I work in the field of education and I know that you cannot really know what your child may choose to do during his or her 4 years in high school.</p>
<p>A year ago, my daughter had to decide between Peddie and Lville. One of the differences between the two schools was the drug/alcohol policy. We were told that Lville had a three strikes and youre out policy. Peddie is zero tolerance. The Peddie policy seemed too harsh given that it is BS and kids do stupid things sometimes, but my daughter chose Peddie. The school does have a team of teachers to support students if they admit to a problem, but I still was worried about what kind of atmosphere that zero tolerance would create. </p>
<p>As another mom wrote, 10 students have been asked to leave this year (2 for cheating and 8 for marijuana-linked offences). I could not believe it when I heard it even though Peddie made it clear on the revisit days the year before.</p>
<p>Yet, now that my daughter is finishing her freshman year, I feel completely different about the zero tolerance policy. My ds take on the students (even the top student who did not make it to graduationmost ended up at another BS not too far away)is that she saw it coming. She says that none of the dismissals surprised any of the students. All of these students had tempted fate, and they lost in the end. She says that it is because Peddie actually enforces the policy that she likes the policy. It is not an empty threat. She feels that the policy creates parameters that she wants to be in place and enforced. It doesnt matter who you are or what you do at Peddieyou break these rules and there are repercussions. And, these parameters, in turn, make her feel safesafe to make the decision to stay away from choosing to experiment or be in a situation where this would be condonedand she finds that her friends feel the sameand so she is not forced to choose between the mores of high school society and her own developing values. She says this it makes it easier to be the way she wants to be. </p>
<p>Looking back at my ds decision, I realize she picked the school that met her needs on levels that I did not even get at the time. And, now that we have experienced a year of BS, I am seeing things differently. The whole darn campus is so happy all of the time. Is it the old Maslows Hierarchy of Needs at play herethese kids need to be safe in order to move on to developing belonging, self-esteem and self actualization? I learned this so long ago when I was a classroom teachermy students wanted to be held accountable no matter how they appeared to actthey wanted me to have high academic expectations for them and to hold firm when it came to behavior expectationsyet I was able to have very positive relationships with them. </p>
<p>I forgot. My kid needs this, too. And, probably even more so in that she is not living in my housethe majority of her teen years will be spent at Peddieand she wants the zero tolerance policythis is what she needs to support her path to the self-actualization that Maslow promised. This was why I went along with sending her to a BSI wanted her to find the way to make the most of her life.</p>
<p>A zero tolerance policy is unnecessary. If a student is expelled, they will continue going on to new schools over and over, exposing more people to drugs. What they really need is help. And, I agree that restrictions may be too tight on boarding school students, although I know that this rule is not always the case. I know a St. Paul’s student who was suspended three times for marijuana use and not kicked out. However, if the school is paying for the student to be there (scholarship, etc.) I can understand how the school would be more angry. However, the school cannot have double standards, so I really think schools should handle such instances on a case by case basis.</p>
<p>I think this thread has a good discussion of the issue: <a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-admissions/581334-drugs-sex-you-boarding-schools.html?highlight=drugs[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/prep-school-admissions/581334-drugs-sex-you-boarding-schools.html?highlight=drugs</a>.</p>
<p>I was particularly interested in the discussion of the effects different policies have upon students who don’t use drugs. Even if you don’t use drugs–and let’s hope you don’t–you do need to know your school’s policies. You could get into serious trouble if you lie about what you know of others’ activities. You also need to know how to protect yourself should your roommate or friends start using or dealing drugs.</p>
<p>I would also take exception to this sentiment:</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>If off-campus drinking and drug use comes to a school’s attention, the school will act. Don’t bet that it won’t, even if you’re a day student.</p>
<p>Periwinkle, what I meant by the excerpt you commented on above was that when a student does drugs, consumes alcohol… etc. off campus, if anybody gets involved it’s usually not their school, simply because the school usually never finds out. I would say the vast majority of the time students are NOT caught when doing drugs and/or consuming alcohol off campus. However, on the off chance that they ARE caught, it’s usually by a parent, guardian or friend who wouldn’t want to jeopardize the student’s place at the school by telling them, so they choose not to inform the school and instead to take matters into their own hands.</p>
<p>Or, if you go to Exeter, it’s because you have a massive house in the suburbs surrounded by other rich white people who will call the police if they hear music coming from another house, as was the case with the recent punishment of eleven uppers and expulsion of three…</p>
<p>sandwindsun-You’re daughter is exactly right. I go to Hotchkiss, which has a zero-chance policy. All of the 5 students that were kicked out had tempted fate before. Two were caught illegally interdorming (they were so loud while having sex in his room that the faculty member walked in on them) three times and were DC’ed (disciplinary committee-sort of like you get put on trial with a jury of impartial students and teachers). The girl that was kicked out was a senior and was not allowed on campus for the last 3 weeks of school, nor was she allowed to walk at graduation. She also did not receive an Hkiss diploma, just a GED. The other three were kicked out during the first week of school. One of them was so drunk she passed out and had to be brought to the hospital. The other two were drunk and I believe they were also snorting coke. Apparently, one of them wanted to “go out with a bang” because she wanted to leave Hkiss anyway. </p>
<p>There is a buddy policy where if another student needs help (they are addicted, dangerously drunk and need to be brought to a hospital, etc.) where a friend can use the Infirmary Policy. Basically, as long as you make it to the infirmary with your friend without a faculty member catching you, your friend gets mercy and only a letter is sent home and other reprimandation (no expulsion).</p>
<p>Personal opinion? You got it. IMO, no chance is just unreasonable. Whether or not you agree with it, teens WILL be teens, and most people have at the very least tried alcohol and/or pot before they graduate. That said, the vast majority of people do not use substances on a regular basis by any means and know when to stop- few are stupid enough to get completely wasted or stoned before, say, a dance <em>ahem</em>. There is a very good chance of getting caught and, more importantly, it’s dangerous. There have been some incidents this year of students getting very, very drunk before a recent dance, to the point of potentially harming themselves (they were caught and DC’ed). </p>
<p>Taking this into account, i think many adults at school may forget what it was like to be in high school and experimenting (or perhaps they fear the wrath of parents who will hold the school responsible even in unreasonable circumstances when their own child is at fault). At Middlesex, however, there is a two-strike policy. A first time offense results in counseling, suspension, and probation. </p>
<p>What I hope to say with all of this rambling is that the vast majority of students’ encounters with substances are not terribly harmful, but rather the curiosity and desire to let loose of high school students. I believe it is those few cases (with a small subset of the school) that go very wrong that create problems for the rest of the student body.</p>
<p>
Curiousity killed the cat. What will it do to a teenager?</p>
<p>Probably not kill them.</p>
<p>Aren’t cats supposed to have nine lives? If that’s true, then they don’t have to worry about being curious. Screw up once and die, it’s ok. Still got eight lives left. </p>
<p>;) </p>
<p>In any case teenagers only have one life, so they really can’t afford to go experimenting with dangerous and addictive substances calling “curiosity” their motive.</p>
<p>Just saying. :)</p>
<p>I totally agree with you luckyduckyme. :D</p>
<p>personally, i dont mind the zero tolerance policy, because when do u have time to get high or drunk at andover or other top tier schools?</p>
<p>Candidate, you have a point. But one must remember: the majority of kids at these schools are not only academically strong, but also VERY clever. If they really wanted to get high and/or drunk, they’d probably figure out a way to do it on top of all the other stuff they have to do at BS.</p>
<p>well then they should be clever enough to find a way to not be kicked out</p>
<p>I’ll tell you this: Andover is very, very lax when it comes to drugs and alcohol by most prep school standards. Almost too lax.</p>
<p>really?10char</p>
<p>yup. they have like a 3-strike policy or something, right? anyway, i stand by my previous opinions.</p>
<p>yea. but zero-tolerance is a way to weed out people who dont care as much. if u want to get drunk do it at home on the holidays. i teen shouldnt drink more than that</p>
<p>Or, if you go to Exeter, it’s because you have a massive house in the suburbs surrounded by other rich white people who will call the police if they hear music coming from another house, as was the case with the recent punishment of eleven uppers and expulsion of three… </p>
<p>Hahahaha I know the girl who owned the house. What an idiot</p>
<p>Candidate, you have a point. But one must remember: the majority of kids at these schools are not only academically strong, but also VERY clever. </p>
<p>Are you kidding?</p>