Time to ditch the "reach, match, safety" concept

Parents Forum
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<p>Now that we have a second kid going through the college thing, I really think it's time to set aside the formula that insists every kid have a few reaches, a few matches, and a few safeties. I don't have an issue with the safeties, of course. It's the "reach" concept. </p>

<p>I know this is anathema to many CCers, but why should we be pushing our kids for reaches? The whole goal is to find a good fit-- ergo, a good match. Now, I know that the tippy-top schools are reaches for everyone, so that's different, but still, parents, GCs and friends should only be encouraging those kids who truly are tippy-top material to go for it. Then it's not a reach in the conventional sense-- the Ivies and mini-Ivies are good matches for them, but it's just a roulette wheel if they will actually get in.</p>

<p>Our older D refused to play that game and applied early to the school she really wanted (a match), got in, and that was that. Our younger considered and toured some reach schools, but they just made her anxious. Why would she want to be at a school where the vast majority come in with higher stats? She wants to be at a place where she can learn, and fit in, and thrive academically, not be scrambling to keep up.</p>

<p>I can't tell you how many well-meaning people, who know she's a wonderful girl and a good student, say, "Why isn't she going for Williams?" (or Tufts or Amherst or whatever) "Why not just go for it?" My answer is, "Why go for it? Why put yourself under that pressure?" Then if you barely squeak in, there's no chance of merit aid, we pay a fortune, and she may be stressed all the time.</p>

<p>I was so grateful at our first-ever meeting with her GC (never did it with D1, who took care of everything herself), because she doesn't play that "reach-match" game. She just helps them with what's the right fit. </p>

<p>My senior has a list of 6-7 schools that are all good fits. She may not get into all of them, but she'll get into more than one, and they're all very fine schools. She can thrive without going to Vassar.... all our kids can.</p>

<p>Off soapbox now.</p>

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<p>I agree with you. I did have my kid apply to 2 reasonable reaches “just in case” he suddenly bloomed more than I was expecting. I did not want to kick myself. He got into one of the two reach schools and we did not send him there. Additionally, there is someone who I know well who is a bit of an elitist. He told me that our son did not “reach high enough” because he got into all of the schools he applied with the exception of one reach school. He forgot that: I want my kid happy just the way he is, and we have to pay the bill. Unlike him, we are a middle class family and it is a huge strain for us to pay for college. We needed to weight our best packages.</p>

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<p>Not every student “reaches.” My first had no reaches just matches and he was accepted at all. S2 did like one school and he was statistically very weak but he knew it and decided that if he didn’t try he’d never know. It was his only rejection but it barely registered with him. I never used that CC language with the kids at all. Thy “get it.” I agree not all kids need “reaches.” Basically if you buy into the premise that students should go to the very best (read selective) college they can get into then you would by nature have “reaches” because you would be shooting for the very best selective college you could get into.</p>

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<p>There are schools that are reaches for everyone, even those with very strong stats. If one of those schools interests a student, they should apply, even though the odds are poor.
I have seen many students get into multiple reaches and get rejected by multiple reaches in the same admissions cycle…it’s not that they are barely qualified for the schools that accepted them, but that there is a lot of luck to selection, even for strong students.</p>

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<p>Don’t confuse “fit” with “match.” A “match” school is one that a kid will most likely get in. I think there are many students for whom a school is a good fit, although they may not have a great chance of getting in. This is most obviously true for the very most selective schools, of course.</p>

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<p>I agree with you. I had no idea that people actually make it a point to apply for reach schools even if they are satisfied with their matches and safeties until I came here. My first time through the application process I applied for a safety, three or four matches, and one reach-- the reach was a lower tiered state school that had a vastly superior program in what I wanted to major in compared to the other schools and I was really borderline in terms of stats (and wasn’t competitive for merit aid no matter where I went.) I ended up going to community college, and the second time through I did two matches and two safeties, all in vastly different environments. I don’t think any of those situations are nonsensical, but reaching just for the sake of reaching seems like it would cause unnecessary stress.</p>

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<p>I think there’s a difference between a school that’s a reach because the applicant’s stats puts him or her in the lower range of admitted students, and reaches like HYPS that admit even very few students of those students who have the stats to get in. </p>

<p>So when we say, as we do on CC, that HYPS, etc., “is a reach for everyone” we actually mean no matter what the student’s profile, it will be hard to get admitted. But for some students, the school will be a reach because their stats aren’t as strong. Those are two different kind of “reach” schools.</p>

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<p>Reach doesn’t mean everyone has higher stats. The problem is many think it does which is why so many are applying to unrealistic schools today. A realistic reach means your stats are solidly in the middle of a school’s range unless you have a hook.</p>

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<p>I see absolutely no point in applying to a school unless you can come up with a plausible rationale for an acceptance letter. If you can’t point to some reason that an admissions office would accept you based on transcript or ECs or something other than just a wing and a prayer, why bother? That doesn’t mean that you’ll get accepted everywhere, but at least you had a plausible shot.</p>

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<p>There were a number of private schools where my S had a chance at admittance (his test scores were in the range but his GPA was low). He would have done alright at these schools (they were not super reaches), but his stats would not have given him the merit aid to make it possible. We could not afford practically full pay. So they were reach schools but financial impossibilities.</p>

<p>The public school he is attending was a reach for the program he was applying into ( more of a match for a general admit), but luckily he was admitted into the program. So that was a reach, but a financial safety. He is thriving, so it was a good choice for him.</p>

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<p>to the OP … I totally agree …</p>

<p>I’ve now done searches with two kids and IMO organizing by reach, match, and safety is not the best set-up and quite likely counter-productive. On his own my second ended up grouping schools by his interest level … high, medium, low, or not-interested. Organizing by reach-match-safety in a way implies that the reaches are “the best” … well they might be the toughest to get into but that does not mean they are “the best” for this particular student. When my second reordered his list by interest level it made much more sense to me … the schools on the top of the list best match his interest in majors, locations, and types of students; a school with these attributes could be a reach, a match, or a safety. </p>

<p>My oldest used the traditional set-up but ended up applying ED to a school that was a “match” … and it was so obvious it was the place for her that before talking to my oldest about the visit/tour I called my wife at the end of the tour (when my oldest was still in HS) and told my wife I knew where FirstToGo would go to school … the fact it was a match versus the reaches on her list was irrelevant … all that mattered was it was the best place for her.</p>

<p>My second has an interesting set of possible majors and is interested in mid-sized schools … SecondToGos list sorted by interest level is a mismash of reaches, matches, and safeties … and the leading contendor is a match/safety and to me it is very reasonable it is SecondToGo’s first choice.</p>

<p>For ThirdToGo I will talk in term of interest level from the get go. I do think that reach, match, safety should be thought about so the list does not end up all reaches … however with a different viewpoint; focussing on the attributes of the school and I believe ThirdToGo will also naturally get a list that is a mix of reaches, matches, and safeties (as did his sibling’s).</p>

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<p>My oldest son did reach – got waitlisted by three top schools and got into one. In the end, he took his financial safety and loves it there. We must have toured 20 schools over three years. The youngest son just started high school. He went on many of those tours. He has no desire to apply to the Ivies or Duke, even if he has the scores/GPA. He is looking for merit money, he told me. He wants lots of learning/service opportunities, and he thinks good sports programs are a must. Sure, he’s just a freshman, but at least he has some clue about what he wants.</p>

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<p>After being among the top students in her HS class, my D did not want to be in that same competitive environment again for the next 4 years. As she put it, “I don’t want to be in a place with a whole class of Suzys” (valedictorian of her class). We visited many schools and she applied to 3 which looking back were probably all safeties for her. However, that did bring her substantial offers of merit money as well as need based. She was able to attend her number 1 choice, was invited to join a selective honors program and received an excellent education. She has done quite well career-wise since graduation. She was very happy and our bank account was too ;).</p>

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<p>I am curious - where did Suzy go ? ;)</p>

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<p>Suzy went to Williams. And she had to make sure everyone knew that.</p>

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<p>We should not be pushing our kids for anything.</p>

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<p>Yes. That is the bottom line. Not just to pay lip service to that mantra, but to live it.</p>

<p>Now if you find a good fit, and that fit is a reach, then you can help your kid get to that fit. I am glad I helped my kid get to her good fit which happened to be a reach. She is ecstatic there. Not because the school was a reach, but because it turned out to be a great fit. She fits the school and the school fits her.</p>

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<p>What happens if your child doesn’t feel safeties are the right “fit”? My son was a very strong student, with great stats, ECs, awards, etc. He toured many colleges, applied to a wide range of choices. Small/large. Private/public. LAC/national research university. He got into many wonderful colleges, got some terrific merit money along with select honors programs, but were they the right fit? Nope. He walked away from them and ended up at a medium, nationally ranked tier one private college. He chose it because of fit even if it’s a reach for many.</p>

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<p>Knowing what I know now, I wish my kids had applied to more reaches. There seemed to be no logic to their acceptances, and rejections.</p>

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<p>If it’s not a fit, then it’s not a safety, match or reach. Kids shouldn’t be applying to schools they wouldn’t attend. </p>

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<p>I don’t think people should push their children to attend college, let alone for reaches. </p>

<p>My son came up with two reaches but at the last minute almost didn’t apply and, yes, we did push him to go through with applying at that point. As it turned out, those were the only two schools he applied to that he was not accepted. </p>

<p>I have found that in my life I’ve learned as much, if not more, from the things that did not go my way as I have from the things that did. I don’t think a student has to be accepted at a reach to make the application worthwhile.</p>

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<p>PMK, you are one of the wisest posters on CC.</p>