My 16 year old daughter is at a boarding school just outside a large metro area. I feel like she is old enough to go places outside of the school sponsored activities, like the mall or out for pizza with her friends, but I can’t figure out the transportation. I don’t want her driving with other students yet; I have never met any of them, the traffic is very heavy in the area near her school, and all her friends with licenses are very new drivers. The nearest public transportation is a long walk and doesn’t run frequently. I am comfortable with her taking an Uber or Lyft as long as she is with a group, but I don’t know how strict those services are on checking the ages of teen passengers. I am considering putting her on my family Lyft account and crossing my fingers that they don’t check her age. Any suggestions on how to deal with this? I don’t want to keep saying no to requests to do normal teenage things because I am wary about newly licensed drivers that I have never met.
Wouldn’t the school have some guidance about this? If she’s boarding the school is responsible for her safety and I can’t imagine they are ok with kids going wherever, however, without letting the school know. And if the school is ok, I cannot imagine their insurers are. But of course, I could be wrong!
Not to mention many states have restrictions for teen drivers and probably additional restrictions for teens licensed out of state for that matter.
Our schedule had a form you filled out that gave blanket permissions. Like “can leave with teacher”. These could be updated at any time.
And if your kid wanted to do something that hadn’t been pre-approved, you’d be contacted for permission (or not).
You may also want to familiarize yourself with the license rules in the state where your D is. In some, a driver under 18 can only drive family members under 18, cannot drive past midnight, etc. (We live in one of these states, and as a parent, I LOVED these restrictions.) With luck, you may be trying to address a problem that has a solution that way.
Likely a moot point as I am unaware of any boarding school which allows boarders to have cars. Of course there are schools on the border, e.g. PEA, where it’s possible there are day students with a Massachusetts license.
I’m assuming the OP will comply with BS directives. I’m sure they all have sign in/sign out guidelines and travel restrictions. But OP’s guidelines may be at a higher standard.
Both of my kids (each at different schools) use Uber. We had to sign a permission form for them to use rideshare companies at the beginning of the year, and our rule is that they always travel with at least one friend. Not every school allows Uber/Lyft though, so you’ll need to check your schools policies.
Whether Uber checks or not is a function of how old she looks. I’ve had my kids take Uber to go to school for a full year when the oldest was in 11th grade
Our day school had tons of kids commute by uber. Mine used it regularly by 15 or 16.
Likely a moot point as I am unaware of any boarding school which allows boarders to have cars. Of course there are schools on the border, e.g. PEA, where it’s possible there are day students with a Massachusetts license.
There are several schools that list the possibility of students in good standing having cars in their FAQs sections. We asked these questions of schools as well when exploring options of getting to club sport activities away from campus. Some schools very well have options for students to have cars.
The likelihood that a school in a more densely populated location would not have the space for students to actually park is a different story.
Our kids use Uber. They rarely and sporadically check ID for age. If/when they do, that Uber gets cancelled and they put in for another.
Our kids ride with day students if/when they choose. Connecticut doesn’t allow other teens in the car for the first year, but honestly…I just Googled that and never knew before (LOL!). We’ve told our kids who and what to look for when deciding to ride with someone. The whole reason we sent them to boarding school was to be independent and trust them to make decisions for themselves. We have never “said no” to driving requests, because we never required that they request and assumed that was well within the scope of what a boarding student can/should manage.
Have you looked for a policy regarding using Uber/Lyft at her school? My sons school has it written that they don’t recommend it and are not responsible for student safety if used but the student can request to use it in their system and if the parent approves it, the student can use it and parents are responsible.
Thanks for the very fast replies! I feel I can always count in the CC community to have thoughtful input.
Her school does have standard permissions that parents agree to at the beginning of the year ( and can override on an ad hoc basis), and her school does allow Uber/Lyft use if parents allow it. There is also a day population that biarders could ride with if they have permission and a few boarders are allowed cars under certain circumstances.
The issue I have been running into is Uber and Lyft’s stated age restrictions. But it sounds like they are not heavily enforced, so they coukd be good options for her.
The age restrictions are completely ignored by everyone IMO, the drivers are well aware they are picking up HS kids, and Ubers are used constantly. If you just go to town nothing but general release is required. And in addition to the older day students a fair number of seniors/PGs have cars on campus even as boarders. Used to be approvals were hard to get but it has gotten a lot easier since covid and kids go all over the place.
My under age kids were never carded using Uber/Lyft.