Trying to get my child to consider all the options

<p>Have you looked at OU (the University of Oklahoma)? I believe that if your daughter is a NMF, she will qualify for ~$45K in scholarships along with a travel stipend and a $1500 laptop allowance. If she doesn’t exhaust the 45K in 4 years, it carries over to grad school.</p>

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<p>Make it clear that admission with insufficient non-loan financial aid and scholarships is equivalent to a rejection.</p>

<p>Your user name indicates that she may be interested in major in a science; for most sciences, graduate study is primarily targeted to PhD. But also note that biology and chemistry tend not to have very good job and career prospects at the bachelor’s degree level, and even PhD level jobs can be extremely competitive. So taking on a lot of student loan debt would not be that great an idea.</p>

<p>UA, UAH and UAB would all give her full rides as nmf. UAB is a very strong science school, home of the med school. if a stem student, then the sci/tech honors program at uab is incredible. Also could apply as a bio or chem scholar for additional money.</p>

<p>This post is targeted at the person who mentioned “stingy”. You must realize that $0 EFC does not mean unlimited financial resources.</p>

<p>what state do you live in? why is your daughter set on that one school?</p>

<p>If you can’t afford the net price for the school your daughter is fixed on let her know NOW and apply to where she can make the most of her National Merit status. The essence of these high scholastic performances, according to me should be proper translation to financial rewards. Like you said, save that money for grad school. I’m sure your daughter would understand. She should broaden her perspective, in my opinion because the cost of college in America is soaring each day. Any full rides she is eligible for should put her and you in a better financial position to enable her enjoy her undergrad years and also save for grad school.</p>

<p>Sent from my GT-S5570 using CC</p>

<p>We have visited University of Oklahoma, and it is definitely on our list. I’m not sure if I could convince her to go anywhere in Alabama, as she recently ruled out University of Alabama (boo). There are a number of schools in Texas and Oklahoma that offer very nice NMF packages.</p>

<p>The reason for the fixation on the one private school is definitely prestige. I agree it is a great school, but money ultimately overrules prestige in my house.</p>

<p>My daughter is a fully committed “Science Girl,” and I agree that just a bachelor’s degree might not get her too far. I tried to convince her of the wisdom of the STEM MBA at Alabama, but that didn’t work out. Leaving some of her college fund for graduate school would help her out tremendously.</p>

<p>If she wants a private college, maybe look at some excellent schools where she is above the average applicant and has a chance for merit aid – for example, if she wants a very different experience, consider Fordham in NYC.<br>
And I think that as long as you are consistent in what you say, there is nothing else you can do. Just be sure she applies to UT. She is fortunate to have an excellent in-state option.</p>

<p>I thought it would be interesting to come back to this post and let everyone know how things turned out. The pricey school was Rice University, and by some miracle she was accepted with substantial merit scholarships. The net price will exhaust her college fund, but its a choice that she made with her eyes wide open. I was glad that when the offer came in she did not jump up and down and accept immediately. She said she wanted to think about it, and she did for almost two weeks. She’s very happy to be headed to Rice, and understands the money situation. I’m still hopeful that she’ll pick up a little more money during her time at Rice, and that she’ll get some good scholarships someday when she applies to graduate school.</p>

<p>I had genuinely expected the outcome of her application to be accepted with little or no merit money. I’m still surprised at how this turned out.</p>

<p>PhD programs in science are typically funded (research assistantship, teaching assistantship, fellowship).</p>

<p>Professional post-graduate programs (e.g. MD, JD, MBA) are typically expensive.</p>

<p>Congrats to your D!</p>

<p>We told our kids how much we could put in the pot,and helped them find schools where they could get an education for far less, and also for schools that were lottery tickets in that regard. We did get some surprises, so throwing in some chance schools is not such a bad idea as long as every understand taht these are truly chances. </p>

<p>I’d leave grad school out of the picture other than as a mention that if she wants funds for after college, the pot is even smaller for undergrad. Doubt she is focusing on that and it’s all just noise buzzing in their ears if they are not focused. Most grad school program have funding available, often in grants and stipends. Most of my kids friends taking that route are living the poor student’s life but it is being covered. Now professional school is a whole other issue, and those have loans available. But trying to explain all of this to an 18 year whose major focus in life is getting into a college with some panache among her crowd is just about impossible. You spell it out and hope it sinks in, which it ususally does as a regret years later,</p>

<p>What is now and should be clear is how much you will pay for the undergraduate experience and make sure that is crystal clear and that it includes loans that you are willing to take out. That’s what we did and our kids just threw out any options that cost more. It seemed to hurt me more than it hurt them.</p>

<p>It’s tough for a lot of these kids who have been used to getting just about everything they wanted and they don’t view this as a want but an essential and entitlement. With college, the price tag is finally at a point where many parents who have mangaged to get that special toy, experience, class, equiptment for their children all of these years, have to put on the brakes. Some even don’t at this time and end up severely in debt and compromise their own financial stability and that of their children in doing so. I have some friends in that positions. Kids need some extra $s more than ever and the parents are in financial trouble and truly not a cent to spare because the whole lot of them borrowed more than they could afford for that college experience.</p>

<p>Just saw the Follow UP to the situation, and congrats to your DD! I’m glad it worked out that way, and I’m glad that your DD was listening to what you were saying and that a lot sank in.</p>

<p>Thanks for posting the follow-up! We seldom get to hear how things turn out, and its great to hear that things worked out so well. </p>

<p>BTW I hope your D ends up spending a semester abroad, something you had mentioned in passing. Kids that do so seem to rave above it, and as an adult with little vacation from work I sure wish I had the time to spend a semester overseas.</p>

<p>Why are so many parents averse to taking out federal loans to send their kid to an awesome private school? Low interest rates, decades to pay them back. Parents are “penny wise, pound foolish”. Loosen up those purse strings!!</p>

<p>Thanks for the congratulatory notes!</p>

<p>So nice to hear about such great results-Congratulations!</p>

<p>Many of the women’s colleges are known for strong merit aid especially for women in science</p>

<p>Her merit aid should carry over if she wants to study abroad through a Rice program. At most colleges these days you just pay normal tuition to the college, and they cover most of the cost of studying abroad through their program. So your assumption that she has to give up a semester abroad due to choosing the more expensive school may not be correct. There are some extra expenses (I think you usually cover her airfare, and any extra travel she wants to do). But often it is pretty comparable to a semester at school. So she should look into that if she still wants to study abroad.</p>

<p>Why are so many parents averse to taking out federal loans to send their kid to an awesome private school? Low interest rates, decades to pay them back. Parents are “penny wise, pound foolish”. Loosen up those purse strings!!</p>

<p>This is the definition of being pound foolish, IMO. Loans are not free money; they are money that parents have to pay back, and they may not be able to afford it. There’s difference between maybe borrowing $10K per year to fill a gap for a great private (which may be doable for some parents) and borrowing $20K or $30K to send a a kid to a school that has bad merit (which many parents may be unable, or unwilling, to do).</p>