@Retrotech201 : If you send your essay via private message, I will offer a brief critique. I am an adult poster.
OP, any story, even War and Peace, can be summarized in 25 words. The beauty of writing includes the right attention to structure and knowing your audience. Adcoms dont need every detail, every ‘he said/then I thought.’ And only just enough context. They do need to see the right traits come through for you and your chances, the qualities they want in their class.
As @SDC9160 said, heed the editing mantra, which I put as: be brutal. You can tell any tale in 2/3 of the words you now have. Lol, think of this a little like the Cliff Notes that tell the same story in a fraction of the words.