So I received a GT (guaranteed transfer option) to Cornell my senior year of HS. I went to SUNY Binghamton my first year and enjoyed it. Then, I transferred to Cornell my first semester, which is a big adjustment–socially and academically-wise. I’m doing well in my classes, however struggling to be happy. I feel very indifferent at my time here, not necessarily “sad” persay, just not looking forward to anything. Plus, since the housing situation in Cornell is terrible, I’ve already signed my apartment lease for next year so turning back seems like an unlikely option. I can frequently visit friends since Binghamton is only an hour away, but this attachment seems unhealthy and impractical. Just wanted to vent and hear some opinions right now.
Stick it out at least until the end of second semester. Join clubs and make new friends.
The social thing can be tough for transfers, since so many connections are made freshman year, in the freshman dorms. This is true anywhere, btw. A lot of times the most likely pool for transfer students seeking new relationships are fellow transfer students, and that pool is obviously smaller and dispersed.
A university environment can feel large and impersonal. To get to know people, it helps to take steps to make your personal environment effectively smaller and more intimate. Where people have to actually interact. Live in a frat, coop, or house, rather than an impersonal dorm. Join a club as suggested, or activity like the radio station, etc. Intramural team or something like that. Take skiing, or hiking or something, where smaller groups do things together on a regular basis. Seek smaller discussion-based seminar-type classes. What worked for me was getting a part-time job; I formed relations with my co-workers. I did this over the summer. In the summer, the environment is more laid-back and relaxed; people want to hang out more. It’s easy to get a sublet then at one of the places with the more intimate environments.
For what its worth, if you were at Binghamton you might be looking for off-campus housing for next year too. My son did that, at least. You might be able to stay in the dorms, but that doesn’t mean you’d want to. Lots of people there don’t. Maybe the timing of commitment might be gentler, I don’t know.
At the end of the day, if you think you’d prefer going back to Binghamton, then do it. But first try hard to get the most out of your current situation, and see if you can make things improve.
It is never easy to move to a new environment, whether it is a job, school, or town. It is great you are doing well academically. Are you studying with others? That may be a good way to meet people. Both of my kids were in Greek life, but they were also dancers. My younger one was a lot closer to her dance club friends than her sorority sisters. I would encourage you to join few clubs and to do some volunteer work. My kids also worked part time while in school. Through their work, they had to interact with the administration and students.
I would try to stay on campus rather than going to visit friends from your old school. It will give you more time to participate in campus activities and feel more connected.
It sounds like you may be a bit depressed. Go see a counselor at Gannett if it doesn’t improve. Hang in there, it is not easy.
It is unhealthy and counterproductive to assimilating into the Cornell environment.
Bump
You’ve been there 2.5 months. Not very long. You need to give it time. Which school are you in? ILR? CAS? Clubs will definitely help. Are you interested in any aspect of the Cornell Daily Sun? Students involved in the Sun are a very close-knit group. You’d make friends there. They recruit new people at the beginning of each semester.
http://cornellsun.com/join-the-sun/
My daughter transferred into Cornell too. Thinking back, she too had difficulty at first. It was the only time in her life where she had some adjustment issues. We were worried.
She didn’t get into the clubs/activities she wanted to do. Her main activity had basically filled up from freshman year (or from fall semester- she entered in the spring), and they only took one transfer student- not her. Her dorm was off-campus and was filled mostly with upperclassmen, who were not social. She was miserable.
Then, everything got better. She met some people to hang out with. (She still sees them, to this day). She got into another activity, which she loved. She got jobs on campus. She got a boyfriend, at some point.
She lived in Collegetown houses her subsequent years, and these became very significant social centers for her. They gave house parties, she threw dinner parties. She went out regularly with people from her house.
Since she had a year lease she stayed during the summer, and this gave her access to another activity
that she really liked and was very social.
She wound up loving it there.
I can’t guarantee you will have the same outcome. But her experience is proof that it is possible, despite a difficult start, and I hope you do.
When I was a senior we threw a house party. It was incredible, I wish I had done it sooner and more often.
People are always looking for stuff to do on weekends. Maybe you can get together with people on your hall and throw a party. Or start your own “meet-up” group to do something.
But these cannot happen if you are going to Binghamton on the weekends.
Kind of reminds me of this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jjiWS__Mp0