UW is excruciatingly intimidating for me!!!

<p>Hey DAWGS,</p>

<p>I guess I just wanted somewhere to vent about my nervousness and found this to be the best place... Anyway, I'm a freshman here at UW and everything about this school is so intimidating to me. The size of it, the classes, the tuition, the peers, etc., etc. </p>

<p>Coming into college, I was ready to change the world. I was so excited to get involved as much I could and never felt better about myself. I then actually started classes and found that everything about this school is on a totally different level than I am. To be frank, I was abused as a child and just recently entered the foster system. I wrote about this in my application letter and believe that because of this, I was accepted into UW due to my circumstances and not my academic performances. I ended high school with around a 3.4 GPA and although that is good for someone who is being abused, it's not good for someone going into a prestigious university like UW. </p>

<p>I'm sure that I'm just being silly though... College is a big leap for anyone! Even if I were as smart as I think I should be, I bet I'd still be nervous. My SOC teacher asked us if we've been asking ourselves some serious life questions recently (i.e. why am I here, am I good enough, etc.) because by entering a new environment like college, we lose our old sense of self identity and begin a new and uncomfortable search for it. So, like I said, I'm sure my feelings are normal.</p>

<p>My question to all of you, however, is how do I get over this. You've all gone through the same thing before so I thought it'd be only natural to ask you all for advice. I'm currently so nervous to raise my hand in class, answer questions, talk to my peers about the curriculum, etc. because I cannot get over the idea that I may sound like a complete idiot... If there's something I could do to get over this that you guys might know of, I'd be utterly grateful for your advice.</p>

<p>Thank you</p>

<p>I feel your pain. I just transferred in from a community college this quarter and I’m an older student so I understand the fear of being judged by your peers. However, I am the opposite of you in the fact that I speak up and tend to monopolize discussions when no one else will speak. While it has earned me brownie points with teachers and TA’s, it doesn’t make you very popular with your classmates. That being said, I have decided that I have overcome so much adversity and worked so hard to get to this amazing place and have this amazing opportunity that I don’t want to waste one minute of it being afraid. Feel proud of your accomplishment. It sounds like you’ve overcome a great deal of adversity yourself to get where you are, have some confidence, own the experience and make the most of it. We all have to sound like idiots and be vulnerable in front if our peers at some point; it’s how we learn and grow as people. Things will get better, and in a quarter or two this self doubt and intimidation will be a distant memory. Good luck!</p>

<p>Whenever you have a question like this ask yourself – how would you behave? Would you be judgmental towards others? Would you stop talking to somebody who sounded “stupid” a couple of times? Would you laugh at somebody who answered a question incorrectly? </p>

<p>Most likely, you will not. And so won’t many other people. Remember that there are many people who are in the same situation. Everybody is concerned about the way others perceive them and everybody is concerned about their relationships with other people. So, don’t worry.</p>

<p>If the problem is getting out of control I recommend you talk to a counselor (not an academic, a different kind) – I think you get free visits as a student.</p>

<ol>
<li><p>Try to get ahead in your classes so you have a degree of familiarity with the topics being discussed in class. This should afford you more comfort when it comes to talking about the material. No shortcuts here though, you would just need to put in the work to comprehend the material in advance.</p></li>
<li><p>I always force myself to attend the first office hours of any professor and usually the TAs as well. I usually don’t have an actual question or problem with the material by then, but if I force myself to attend the office hours earlier in the quarter I know I will be more comfortable attending later in the quarter when I actually have a question. Sometimes I am very frank and basically say some version of the aforementioned. This can also score brownie points which may help you when it comes to final grades. It shows you made an effort.</p></li>
<li><p>Realize there are many other students who feel the same way you do. Use this common ground as a way to forge relationships and build your “small learning community” as UW likes to say. The earlier the better because as the quarter progresses groups of students begin to soldify and the anxiety of college diminshes a little. That isn’t to say that people won’t be accepting, because they should be, but the earlier the better.</p></li>
</ol>