Veteran,.student transfer loner.

Y’all so I feel like I missed out on so much not going to college straight out of high school. I did 3 years, went to a CC got my AA degree and transferred to a university… I’m 25 and feel like maybe I’m just not a people person which I know I am but my anxiety gets the best of me and it makes it super hard to make friends. Any suggestions? My roommate is in a sorority and I’m gonna pledge in the fall, but until then I’m not sure how to make friends or approach people. Especially guys. Like there is this guy in my accounting class that gave me some weird but good feeling and all he did was look at me. I wanna approach him but I’m sure he doesn’t think I’m pretty or whatever. I’m not sure what to do about these situation…

As you are a junior, you should be settled into a major: ime, that is a good place to make friends naturally, It will matter a little less that you are new there, b/c often the majors are just finding each other in third year anyway.

So look for ways to work or play with the other people in your major- is there a lounge (official or unofficial) for the majors in your subject? do you have a test coming up that you could study for with a few other students? there are surely activities- academic and social- posted for your major- get on top of that, and be the first to volunteer (esp for the less-glamorous jobs), and be reliable and cheery. Bonus: you will get better known within your department- which is also where you often get good leads on internships and jobs, and another way for profs to get to know you (handy for recommendations).

Focusing more on doing things that are genuinely interesting to you (which includes being interested in getting a good grade!) will put you in regular contact with other people who are interested in similar things. You will find yourself knit in faster, and over time friendships will develop.

@Navybay08 You missed out on a “college experience” directly after high school while your previous classmates missed out on a “military experience”

The good thing is that now you have the opportunity to do the former :slight_smile: (but with veteran perks!)

So although I used to feel the same way as you, but I personally feel like the grass is always greener on the other side.

Best advice I have is to take a leap and try to be the one initiating conversations with people. Start off with simple questions on classwork, hw, or whatever small talk you can with classmates. Give a smile or greeting to your classmates (like your accounting one). They suddenly might approach you and initiate themself.

Find your school’s veteran office, resources, pages or groups. Although i’m able to make friends with my lab partners in class, I found it easiest to connect with other veterans.

If you’re really worried about looks and appearance, do what you can to make yourself feel confident.

You had the courage to serve in the military, so you know you have the courage to get out there and make friends - when it comes to the right ones, just be yourself and everything should take care of itself from there on

I feel like making friends in college was all about “right place at the right time.” It’ll be very difficult to make friends if you don’t spend time on campus at places where other students are. People person or not, you need to at least put yourself in situations where you have the option of meeting people. Questions about homework is a great place to start as it might end-up in study sessions. It’s also not too late to join student groups centered around at topic of interest to you.

Hang in there!!