What happened to my great kid?

<p>Hoo, yeah. First child was AWFUL before leaving for college. Second child is more mellow to begin with, which helped, and we took advantage of a prep program that had him at his college for much of the summer before freshman year. It was a great experience for him and I think it helped avoid many of the issues that came up with the oldest.</p>

<p>We went through the same thing last year. It was so disappointing, because I wanted to cherish the “last” summer together before she went out on her own. But instead, it was a miserable summer. When she was home for a weekend in February, I noticed a huge change in her. She was asking us what she could do to help (so unlike her), and just more amicable. Now she calls us almost daily to ask us for our insight into one thing or another. It’s so nice. She is away at school this summer, but this summer is so much more pleasant than last summer. I pick her up on Friday, and then we have about 3 weeks to enjoy her before she heads back for the fall.</p>

<p>Apparently this is a right of passage. I’ll be prepared for it with our next child.</p>

<p>You are not alone. I think of it as a right of passage. I been sad and upset about her leaving for the last year. After this not so much fun summer, I am ready for her to go. Good thing she got a job this summer is all I am going to say. She does nothing in the house. </p>

<p>I did have to pull the I am not paying for college card, if you don’t stop being so rotten. She was giving me a hard time and was I was finally done with her mouth.</p>

<p>OMG thank goodness I thought I was the only one going through this, DD has been driving me nuts. I even asked the school to take her early at orientation day. Never had an issue with her in 18 years and now she is like a monster. Hope she is better when she comes home at Thanksgiving</p>

<p>From a child’s perspective, I personally think that most people my age are on the cusp of having almost absolute freedom, and most are already transitioning into that mindset, and it causes tension with parents when their sense of freedom which they think they already have clashes with the rules that they’ve dealt with for 18 years. Personally, I don’t really go out much at all, so I don’t have to deal with what more social people have to deal with. When I do though, I always say where I’m going first (usually to a friend’s house), and I have no problems with my mom asking where I’ll be and calling ahead to make sure that their parents are home. However, usually I go somewhere else with whoever I hang out with, either to eat or another person’s house, and that decision is usually formed and decided upon within a couple minutes. I just have a problem with informing my mom every time I go somewhere else…because I’m pretty sure she would get annoyed with a call every hour or so, usually pretty late at night too.</p>

<p>This was us 2 years ago, and rest assured, it passes. </p>

<p>Remember that you are all a ball of emotions right now. Kids are sad (about leaving friends, family, familiarity), scared (despite bravado), excited (I will be in charge of myself!), and impatient (senior summer is a time of limbo). YOU, on the other hand are sad (college marks the end of childhood), scared (how will s/he do without my watchful eye?), apprehensive (exactly how empty is an empty nest?), but also relieved and proud (all that work paid off!). It’s no wonder everyone is touchy and irritable.</p>

<p>Be a little kind, a little patient – with yourselves and your kids. Keep perspective; don’t let little snafus become big blowups. And it really helps if you LOOK FOR excuses to laugh, separately and together.</p>

<p>OP - A friend warned me about the “fouling the next” behavior before DS started senior year of hs. He wasn’t all that bad, but knowing it was typical behavior helped me feel better.</p>