<p>Our son is at our alma mater, which made it easier to leave him since we are so familiar with the school and the campus. Even though the only soul he knew on campus was his roommate, who he had met 4 hours before during move-in (and on Facebook over the summer, of course), and we live nearly 300 miles away, it made it a lot easier leaving him in a place that was familiar and beloved to us.</p>
<p>That said, the college had a convocation, after which they gave everyone 15 minutes to say goodbye, then the college bell tolled to summon the kids to some activity. The tolling bell, with a tape of the dirge-ish Alma Mater playing over the loudspeakers, would have brought the stone-hearted to tears! </p>
<p>2 SUGGESTIONS -
When you get home from drop-off, don’t do what I did. Don’t wander into your kids’ room and look around at all the things he/she chose to leave behind. Don’t look at their school project on the shelf and realize that their childhood is REALLY over. Just don’t. Unless you want to buy stock in Kleenex.</p>
<p>2) If you’re afraid you’ll cry at drop-off, remind yourself of the moms and dads who are saying goodbye to their kids at a military airfield, watching their brave young men and women ship out to Afghanistan. You’ll immediately feel much better about leaving your kid at some lovely, safe college campus here in the good old USA.</p>
<p>I tell myself this every day. I don’t know how those moms do it. Many do it several times. I brought my son for his annual doctor’s appointment, and the receptionist and I exchanged greetings. When I asked “how have you been?” she said “fine, but in 27 days that won’t be the case.”</p>
<p>Her son was being shipped off to Iraq in 27 days. My day seemed much easier after hearing that.</p>
<p>We had orientation with both kids at move in time. With DS, we moved him into his room, attended orientation, had lunch at the end, and left. With DD, it was the same except that she spent the night before the orientation in the hotel with me instead of in her dorm room alone. I actually left her on campus and spent two days visiting a friend who lived nearby. We hugged and parted…no tears. </p>
<p>However today I took DS to the plane to fly to his first job and I sobbed all day.</p>
<p>thumper,
Going through something similar. I cried when I left both kids at college, but no major sobbing. However, D has left today for a job try out far away and my heart is heavy as if I could completely lose it at any minute. I have been telling myself things like Laflalum mentioned about the military, but I think what is tough is that when you leave them at college there is a goal and a time framework for getting to that goal. For real life, there’s no road map and it makes me feel wobbly.</p>
<p>I agree with the above. The same S who happily left me standing on the sidewalk four years ago at drop-off day, graduated last month and commissioned into the U.S. Navy. He is temporarily assignned to his college NROTC unit but has his orders and will leave for his real assignment in mid-Oct. It still hasn’t quite sunk in yet. I have a feeling the college worries will be small in comparison to this.</p>
<p>D1 is home this summer before she goes off to Australia. All of us realize this may very well be her last summer at home. Next summer if she gets an internship she will be living away from home. Once she starts working, if we are lucky, she’ll only be home for long weekends. I think she realizes that. She is hanging out with me a lot.</p>
<p>After reading this thread I arranged a family party the weekend before she leaves (which is mid-Sept. so most of her friends will already be gone) and asked each relative to send me a few pictures to create a small family album for her to take. Thanks everyone!</p>
<p>Leaving him was hard but the following few weeks were worse for me, and he was only an hour away. But he is my only child so I really was coming home to an empty nest. And most of my friends still had a child at home so that did not help. But I did adjust, and it is mostly all good, it just took some time. </p>
<p>A friend whose son went farther away had a bbq for some of us parents about 3 weeks after all the kids left. That was great. I would suggest doing that as it gives you a place to talk about it and compare notes on how often they are or are not calling and all the issues that are arising. It helps to know that you are not alone and that your child is just being normal.</p>
<p>Now he is home for the summer and although some things are different, some things are the same. It is another adjustment and I think this year when he leaves again it will be easier because I know when he comes home again, although some things are different, the important things are the same.</p>
<p>My DD had a harder time than her brothers, in part because they stayed in state and she went far away and because they are boys. I remember getting in the rental car to go to the airport and she just stood on the curb crying pathetically as I drove away. I had been so certain it would be the other way around but I was pretty sure she needed me to not fall apart. Window seats are a good choice on a plane trip back from the drop off as it’s less obtrusive to cry in a window seat. You can pretend you’re fascinated with the view.</p>
<p>I do not remember any tears at all. We were excited for him and he had a great time during his 2 day outing at the university research center on Lake George-swimming, hiking, making new friends with a small group of other incoming freshmen. He had a good overnite time during orientation that summer too. After the convocation we had lunch and said our goodbyes in the resident hall parking lot. He headed off to see what his new friends were up to and we headed home to our empty nest.</p>
<p>It sounds like some universities provide activities to make the transition easier. If you provide stuff for the students to do and their parents see that they are have a good time, then it’s easier for the parent to let go.</p>
<p>Day one: move in and associated bureaucracy. Dinner for parents students. Students have meetings and party. Parents can attend a student panel Q and A session.
Day two: Convocation, picnic lunch reception for parents and students. Various presentations available to parents in the afternoon, but most left sometime after lunch. Orientation activities for students continue…</p>
<p>This worked out well. We could scope out what was needed for a run to a store, get the vibe of the place and just leave pretty much when we wanted. But since the kids were busy, the parents get the message and leave!</p>