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<p>we pay for educationally related summer experiences, although most kids wouldn’t consider them “experiences,” I suppose.</p>
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<p>We have posted to each other before, and you daughter has accomplished a lot. I don’t understand why your reputations among peers is in tatters.</p>
<p>Ellen – The “experiences” I am talking about have very little educational content and only marginal recreational value.</p>
<p>Northeastemom – I am saying that with tongue in cheek…for the most part. The parents of one of our daughter’s friends, whose income is at best on par with ours, and who have probably made a half dozen or more expensive trips to Walt Disney World resort with their kids in the past 10 years, can’t understand why we have not done the same. They did scratch their heads in wonder why we saved up for several years to take a trip to Europe with our kids before the oldest one left home. They had no objection to the European trip, just couldn’t understand why we took the two kids.</p>
<p>First, Opie is being honest, if you calling him rude, negative and to channel his agression is rude. He has the right to say his opinion and as we respect you, you should do the same.----from bulletandpima</p>
<p>@bulletandpima. I dont understand why you think that its rude to call him–a person who says a person’s parents shouldnt love them–negative. wouldnt you define that kind of comment as rude and negative? its important to channel ones agression also and not rude to suggest that. an opinion can be said without being rude. i dont think anyone would call him rude if he was sharing his opinion respectfully.</p>
<p>some people lower to that level to prove a point.</p>
<p>@opieofmay. why did your wife interact with her mom at all during thiose years where the mom was mean? isnt your point that people should cut out those parents? dont know her sitch but to use your method of generalizing i’d say that she shouldnt have bothered with the mom at all if she hurt her.</p>
<p>i am flattered that you are flattered but i just checked the 2 oldest posts pages, sorry to ruin your mood. def think you get out your agression here on CC based on what i read.</p>
<p>rail and your phsyc degree is from where? :)</p>
<p>How are your posts any different than mine in tone, except you’re the one posting? You certainly are all sunshine and rainbows yourself.. </p>
<p>and to your question, yes, pretty much did cut her out, starting celebrating holidays at our home w/o mil. We live within a few miles of each other and “might” see her once or twice a year in the past… things evolved, things improved, things change… So yes, we did practice what we preach, until things improved to a state where mutual respect occurs. Took probably 20 years, but it changed. </p>
<p>You been around 20 years yet? 
that’s a while to limit contact… </p>
<p>so yes, it happens and yes, sometimes the best choice is to leave the situation as it takes two for it to happen… Now you certainly can come back and test the waters and try again to check for improvement. wouldn’t that make sense?</p>
<p>I’m sorry you don’t like my writting style… if I knew how to put flowers and ponys on my written words, I certainly would. Again, the choice is simply don’t read my posts or interact if you don’t like what I am saying… hey? sorta like the subject of your question? If you don’t like my points, simply don’t read them..</p>
<p>I’m with the poster who doesn’t get it when people spend a fortune on lavish trips, cars, electronics, etc. and then come Senior year say, " We don’t have the money for the dream school!" Gee, guess why!</p>
<p>Who saw the debate?
Is it true that Mass. has a free ride for the top 25% of MA grads to state Universities? (according to Mitt)
If this is true than be thankful, NC does not offer that VA doesn’t either. I have heard TX also offers this</p>
<p>It offers free tuition to the top 25% of MCAS scorers. This only applies for public schools, because private schools do not take the MCAS. Sadly, the price of tuition and fees is uner $10K, and from what my friend who got the scholarship (it’s called the Abigail Adams scholarship) it actually only discounts the tuition portion of that $10K, which is about $2K. Pretty misleading, huh?</p>
<p>On that one, MLEVINE is correct - the scholarship is worth only about $2,000 while tuition, fees, and R&B are about $16,000. And it’s not really the top “25% of graduates”; it’s students who score “Proficient” in one or both of the English and Math tests and are in the top 25% of their graduating class.</p>
<p>(By the way, H and I told our kid that we’d pay for the school she wanted to go to, regardless of cost. And we’re doing it - not happily; we can’t “afford it” - but we’re doing it. However, I strongly believe that it is up to each individual parent and family to decide how much they will pay. I don’t count their money and I don’t know their circumstances, and I don’t know the relationship between parent and child.)</p>
<p>BULLET - That is a very deceiving statement about a ‘free ride’ in Mass - that offer to the top 25% of MCAS scores is actually a scholarship to cover the ‘‘tuition’’ piece of the required amount - which is about/less than 20% of what they call tuition for the state U - add to that about $10K in mandatory fees. The University system in Mass is one of the 5 highest in the country - for in-state students - including UNH - UVM in that list as well. Tuition and fees in Mass go into 2 different troves in the state - So now the cost of an education for Mass students is over the top.</p>
<p>Cost of attendance was one of the reasons we looked/considered to NC Univ system for one of our kiddos - it was cheaper to send our kiddo to NC OOS than it was going to be to go to UMass in- state. The UMass system is NO bargain what-so-ever. Mitt leaves out the part of the mandatory fees included in ‘tuition’ system - makes him look good for sure.</p>
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<p>I would bet that Rutgers makes this list as well. COA is now about 20,000.</p>
<p>NEM - I wasn’t referring to cost of attendance - just tuition/fees LOL - COA is well over $20k for Umass for in-staters. OOS COA is around $30K+</p>
<p>DKE SAID: “I’m with the poster who doesn’t get it when people spend a fortune on lavish trips, cars, electronics, etc. and then come Senior year say, " We don’t have the money for the dream school!” Gee, guess why!"</p>
<p>Sorry DKE, but parents aren’t suppose to bust their butt and work all endless hours just so their kid can go their “Dream School”. There must be a balance. There is nothing wrong with going on lavish trips, cars, electronics, etc… and then in the student’s senior year saying; "We can afford for you to go to “State U”. If you want more than that, work it out yourself’.</p>
<p>The world doesn’t revolve around the children. And most definitely, neither does my bank account. Now, if a parent wasn’t going to contribute anything, I think that’s pretty crappy. But I’m not working my butt off so my son or daughter can go to Harvard, Yale, Princeton, etc… on my dime. Ain’t going to happen. Even if I had more than enough money.</p>
<p>Jeepmom,</p>
<p>Rutgers-NB: 2006-07 2005-06 2004-05
Tuition & fees<br>
In-state $9,958 $9,221 $8,564<br>
Out-of-state $18,463 $16,819 $15,599<br>
Books and supplies $900 $815 $800<br>
On-campus<br>
Room and board $9,312 $8,838 $8,357<br>
Other expenses $2,128 $2,311 $2,263<br>
Off-campus<br>
Room and board $13,760 $13,081 $12,103<br>
Other expenses $3,005 $3,093 $3,120<br>
Off-campus with family<br>
Other expenses $5,465 $5,374 $5,323 </p>
<p>UMass-A: In-state $9,595 $9,278 $9,186<br>
Out-of-state $19,317 $18,397 $18,039<br>
Books and supplies $1,000 $1,000 $500<br>
On-campus<br>
Room and board $6,989 $6,517 $6,189<br>
Other expenses $1,400 $1,400 $1,400 </p>
<p>Source is the National Center for Educational Statistics</p>
<p>It looks like Rutgers charges more for R&B (nearly 2300/year more) and for “other expenses”</p>
<p>
LOL. Texas doesn’t give top students a bowl of beans or a bedroll, much less free tuition. The val (singular) gets a one year tuition exemption at state schools. Of all the positive things we have, college financing is not one of them. Florida and Georgia lead the way in that (from what I’ve heard), with Arkansas and South Carolina and many other state colleges being far more generous with their top in-state students than Texas colleges. It is cheaper for many Texans with high stats to go OOS to Arkansas, Oklahoma, Ole Miss , Alabama, South Carolina, or Clemson and many top students do.</p>
<p>Estimated costs for 2008-2009: (subject to change)</p>
<p>In-State Out-of-State NERSP*
Tuition/Fees $9,921 $20,499 $11,207
Room/Board $7,478 $ 7,478 $ 7,478
Total $17,399 $27,977 $18,685 </p>
<p>add on - books/supplies/other expenses for COA</p>
<p>*New England Regional Student Program</p>
<p>The biggest problem in Mass is that the actual tuition is pretty low…BUT mandatory fees are off the wall - because these funds are managed by 2 different offices/coffers of the state - they raise the fees just about every semester but have cut programs/resources etc…yet they cont to admit more students than they can manage/handle - kids live in hotels at times out there = happens more frequently than you would think - and not just at the main one in Amherst - but also the campus in Dartmouth MA. Every UMass as a different tuition figure as well. </p>
<p>The Univ system has been incredibly mis-managed over the past 7-10 years so that it is now in such a mess they don’t know how to get out of it. One of the reasons for the ‘tuition free’ programs is that sooo many kids are leaving MA for schools elsewhere - at same/less expense - kinda like us LOL. UMass/Amherst is still call ZOOMASS - frequently in the news - and not in a positive manner either :(</p>
<p>Each to his own, Christcorp. H is working his butt off specifically so the kids can go to the best school they can get into.( as his parents did before him so that he could) It just depends how important a family thinks a certain type of education is. We’re really big on private schools.</p>
<p>Florida and I think Georgia also offer free rides to the top high school students in the state.</p>
<p>The val gets squat here, unless they have applied for it. NC and VA give absolutely nothing to the top grad.<br>
I only asked about MA, b/c I personally take candidates w/ a grain of salt and Mitt said this in the debate. I was pretty sure he warped it to make him look good, but threw it out there for people in the know to answer. Afterall there is no such thing as a free lunch. It not only sounded like lunch, but dinner, and breakfast!</p>