<p>I would think one reason is that race is something that's immediately visible and a common point. It's like wearing a "i like chess" or "i love nabokov" or "i'm a math major" t-shirt, but all the time. You just immediately know you have something in common with someone. Besides, this is America. To paraphase Amy Tan, in a sea of white faces two Chinese people are already like friends. I'm sure that's true of other ethnicities as well. It's not good but people tend to stay in their comfort zones.</p>
<p>"i love nabokov"</p>
<p>.........lol</p>
<p>From my own experience, most of the minorities (except blacks) at my college are international. There aren't alot of Asian-Americans, Hispanic-Americans, etc here. Those are are minority Americans tend to more hang out with other races. The int'ls tend to hang out all with each other through ISO (Int'l Student Org.). I think most just feel more comfortable around each other since they're all new to the US, and they can speak in their native language instead of (mostly broken) English.</p>
<p>Its natural to hang out with kids who look like you or participate in the same clubs.</p>
<p>people love to identify themselves with someone of their own culture.</p>
<p>Asians hang out with asian only b/c
Some asians don't speak english very well
or
we afraid of racist who insult us..(even if guy is not racist, we feel like they insult us in their inside or when no asians are there..you see..there are lots of TV shows sarcastic about asian..)</p>
<p>But the real truth is...I really want to hang out with other ethinity guy..but you know..it's kinda afraid..</p>
<p>
[quote]
For example a lot of Asians are smart so if they want to like make friends with interests thats where they go.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>So smartness is the main cohesive factor for friendship among Asians? Aren't there smart whites, Hispanics and blacks who smart Asians would want to be friends with? Because I don't think smartness is exclusive to Asians.</p>
<p>No.</p>
<p>The main cohesive factor is that people simply feel more comfortable with their own kind.</p>
<p>It's not wrong to be a part of an ethnic clique, but I think that people should consider befriending people of outside their race. Sticking with the ethnic clique, NOT taking the time to know other people, AND dismissing people based on stereotypes are what bother me.</p>
<p>PEALS-05, I agree. Intelligence isn't exclusive to Asians.</p>
<p>Its because most people are racist.</p>
<p>Spread the word.</p>
<p>Subconscious racism and segregation is very much embedded in our system from the time we're in kindergartner (think about what you imagined an indian looked like when u were 5, you would picture a guy with a tomahawk and feathers probably.)</p>
<p>We need to get rid of the stereotype that Asians are smart. It pi***s me off. There are loads of dumb Asians at my school.</p>
<p>I think this is a stupid question. Look around you. Most Asians, Whites, Blacks, Jews, Hispanics, and whatever else do talk and hang out with each other. I have never experienced a community where people only stuck to those of the same race (also havnt been to rural america so it is probably different there). Since America was established, people have stuck with others of the same ethnicity. When the Irish and Germans came they went where other Irish and Germans were and did not try to assimliate immediatly. I still think there are some Irish neighborhoods in big East Coast cities. Same holds true for every race. The answer to the OP's question is that everyone feels most comfortable when everyone around them is just like them. Noone wants to be the minority. Annother reason is that it is easier to make the initial connection with someone of the same race. I am Indian (South Asian) and when I enter a room and do not know anyone I gravitate towards the other Indian kids. Don't ask me why. It just happens. When I had an orientation for my internship program there were like 5 orientals, 5 whites, 5 indians 5 hispanics, and five african americans. Guess who I talked to first. The Indians. It's just easier to approach a complete stranger and small talk (atleast for me) if they are your same race. This changes a lot if I go out of the US where I will probably click with Americans or if I go to the deep south where I will click with other mid atlanticers. It is just easier to be with people who are like you. If this is not true, explain why historically black schools still are highly black. Explain why Notre Dame is 76% white with only 8% Asians, when Asians are supposed to be over represented at good colleges. People like their comfor zones and comfort zones are when you are with people just like you.</p>
<p>Note: Don't criticize me for flocking to Indians. I was the only Indian kid in my grade till high school (there were others in grades above and bellow me but in my school system the grades are fairly segregated till high school). I learned how to make friends with people who are white, black, hispanic, middle eastern, and asian. Right now I have a group of friends and I am the only Indian and I only consider one Indain kid at my school to be one of my real friends. I have put up with a lot of crap from my mom for not being friends with all the other Indian kids and the reason is because not all of them are my type.</p>
<p>
[quote]
I think this is a stupid question. Look around you. Most Asians, Whites, Blacks, Jews, Hispanics, and whatever else do talk and hang out with each other. I have never experienced a community where people only stuck to those of the same race (also havnt been to rural america so it is probably different there). Since America was established, people have stuck with others of the same ethnicity. When the Irish and Germans came they went where other Irish and Germans were and did not try to assimliate immediatly. I still think there are some Irish neighborhoods in big East Coast cities. Same holds true for every race. The answer to the OP's question is that everyone feels most comfortable when everyone around them is just like them. Noone wants to be the minority. Annother reason is that it is easier to make the initial connection with someone of the same race. I am Indian (South Asian) and when I enter a room and do not know anyone I gravitate towards the other Indian kids. Don't ask me why. It just happens. When I had an orientation for my internship program there were like 5 orientals, 5 whites, 5 indians 5 hispanics, and five african americans. Guess who I talked to first. The Indians. It's just easier to approach a complete stranger and small talk (atleast for me) if they are your same race. This changes a lot if I go out of the US where I will probably click with Americans or if I go to the deep south where I will click with other mid atlanticers. It is just easier to be with people who are like you. If this is not true, explain why historically black schools still are highly black. Explain why Notre Dame is 76% white with only 8% Asians, when Asians are supposed to be over represented at good colleges. People like their comfor zones and comfort zones are when you are with people just like you.</p>
<p>Note: Don't criticize me for flocking to Indians. I was the only Indian kid in my grade till high school (there were others in grades above and bellow me but in my school system the grades are fairly segregated till high school). I learned how to make friends with people who are white, black, hispanic, middle eastern, and asian. Right now I have a group of friends and I am the only Indian and I only consider one Indain kid at my school to be one of my real friends. I have put up with a lot of crap from my mom for not being friends with all the other Indian kids and the reason is because not all of them are my type.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Amazing post. I can relate to what you said. Even my mom wants me to hang out with indian kids mostly, but sometimes thats just not possible as some of them might not be my type.</p>
<p><em>only read the first and last pages</em></p>
<p>There's nothing wrong with "self-segregation" or whatever. </p>
<p>What kind of weirdo worries about whether or not they have enough friends of each race? I happen to think it's much worse to make friends with people solely for the sake of looking oh-so-accepting of everyone. </p>
<p>People are friends with other folks they click with. If that means they have more friends of their race than of others, so be it. I don't have many friends at my school (I'm a freshman) that aren't white because everyone in all of my classes is white except for one Asian guy. Whoop-de-do.</p>
<p>As for the rural America thing. </p>
<p>In the rural East Texas town I grew up in, the only group that really "stuck together" was the group of illegal Mexican immigrants. They couldn't (or refused to) speak English and didn't like white or black folks...or the Mexicans that were born in the US (or came here when they were very young) because they were friends with white and black folks. Nobody liked them either, though, because of their crappy attitudes. </p>
<p>There were actually very few white and black kids that were just flat out racist against other groups. </p>
<p>Oh, and my town didn't have very many Middle Eastern or Asian folks, so they would have been pretty lonely if they had only been friends with other Middle Eastern or Asian kids.</p>
<p>Anyway, it seems to me that large cities are much more segregated than small towns.</p>
<p>The Op and alot of you are talking about removing racism when it is in fact you who is racist. I hang out with people who speak my language and have the same culture as I do. Most of the time, I want friends who can talk about my own kind of experiences, but I have all kinds of friends who may not have anything in common or in agreement with me. Often, people with similar background form communities because they relate to each other and can depend on each to understand and support. It is the racists that only see race as the similarity between these people. I am from Hunan, and I have almost no one from the same place to be my friend. Thus, I often hang with other people who understand Chinese language and culture, but who may not have too much in common with me. I for one, would not reject people of "other races" anymore than someone from Shanghai or Beijing. Race was constructed by Eurocentrists like the Nazis, because they were too ignorant to understand and tolerate other cultures and the very different cultures of people who may or may not look alike, who may or may not be in the same "race."</p>
<p>
[quote]
What kind of weirdo worries about whether or not they have enough friends of each race? I happen to think it's much worse to make friends with people solely for the sake of looking oh-so-accepting of everyone.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Oh please. No one mentioned anything about "quotas" or making sure they have a set number of whatever race friends.</p>
<p>There's just something odd, however, about being in an extremely racially diverse enviroment-- college-- and yet not seeing "mixed" groups. If a white student is surrounded by black, Hispanic and Asian students, and yet doesn't have any friends from among these groups, that's odd. If you're a Kansan and you're surrounded by people from Texas, yet you don't have any Texan friends, what's wrong with Texans? </p>
<p>No one mentioned having a set number of so-and-so type friends. But lack of branching out to people is a problem. When you go to a mixed school but all your friends are only of one "type" of person, what's wrong with the other "types" of people? Why hasn't there been contact on a real level of friendship with those who are different?</p>
<p>I guess what I said about rural America wasnt that tactful. I suck with diction. But that is not here or now. I dont mean to say that rural Americans are racist. I would just assume that towns in rural America are highly white and wouldnt have many Asians, Hispanics, etc making it hard to be very diverse. I live in a metropolitan area and while I see people of the same race sticking with each other. However, I have never seen anyone refuse to talk to me because of my race or refuse to be my friend because of my race. It is easiest to connect with someone with a similar age, gender, race, religion, upbringing, and hometown than someone who you have nothing in common with. How can I be friends with someone anyway if we have absolutly nothing in common (doesnt matter what race we are). Race is one thing that creates a common bond between people.</p>
<p>
[quote]
The Op and alot of you are talking about removing racism when it is in fact you who is racist. I hang out with people who speak my language and have the same culture as I do. Most of the time, I want friends who can talk about my own kind of experiences, but I have all kinds of friends who may not have anything in common or in agreement with me. Often, people with similar background form communities because they relate to each other and can depend on each to understand and support. It is the racists that only see race as the similarity between these people. I am from Hunan, and I have almost no one from the same place to be my friend. Thus, I often hang with other people who understand Chinese language and culture, but who may not have too much in common with me. I for one, would not reject people of "other races" anymore than someone from Shanghai or Beijing.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>What if you're Chinese-American or Mexican-American? What if you were born and raised in America? Would you not share the same language and mindset and attitude as white or black Americans might? </p>
<p>Since you're an international student, its understandable why you would want to keep close to those who would best understand you. But a Korean girl who grew up in SoCal? A Puerto-Rican who grew up in Brooklyn? Are they not Americans, and would be able to culturally understand and identify with other Americans, be they white or black? </p>
<p>There's a difference between mainstream white American culture and, say, Vietnamese-American culture, but both are American. I don't think they are polar opposites of each other. So while international students have an "excuse" to "stick together", why do so many born and bred Asian-Americans, Hispanic-Americans, black-Americans and white-Americans segment themselves off? If they were all born and raised in America, learning English and American culture, why do they still choose to seperate themselves? Race is really that big a factor?</p>
<p>
[quote]
Race was constructed by Eurocentrists like the Nazis, because they were too ignorant to understand and tolerate other cultures and the very different cultures of people who may or may not look alike, who may or may not be in the same "race."
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Really? So there aren't Japanese racists or Ethiopian racists or Indian racists? So the Chinese, who aren't particularily "Eurocentric", would not recognize race or ethnic differences, because only Eurocentrists are "too ignorant to understand and tolerate" other cultures?</p>
<p>this is a list of factors (in order of importance) that basically determine your social circle at my high school, just thought i'd throw it in...</p>
<ol>
<li>language</li>
<li>previous friendship</li>
<li>race</li>
<li>looks/dressing style</li>
<li>proximity</li>
<li>intelligence</li>
<li>personality/interest (sadly this comes last)</li>
</ol>
<p>i have friends of different races and cultures, but mainly because i have upper-level classes and smarter people generally tend to be more open. i go to a rather crappy high school, but i imagine it's not that far off from the average scenario. if someone can prove me wrong i'd be very glad :D</p>