I’ll try to keep this as short as possible. So basically I’m going through the toughest times I’ve ever gone through in my 20 years of life. I’ve always been a gloomy/moody person but at the same time was cheery kid. I never could tell anyone about my depression or anxiety because I would hate thinking about what would they think of me? How would they react? I’ve been quiet about it until recently (couple months ago) when I tried to take my life. I seeked counseling in hopes of mayne getting better but I’ve only gotten worse. I have 0 motivation in anything now. I hate having to go to school, I don’t want to talk to anyone, I don’t even want to live. literally i just want to stay in bed or just not exist. This has obviously effected my school life. To make things worse, is that I go by a quarterly system which makes classes much shorter than semesters. Ever since last quarter my grades started to drop. I failed my first ever class and withdrew from a class. I had both my dog die, and my girlfriend break up with me that semester I just broke down.I felt like crap all the time and gave up. Now I’m failing 2 out of 3 classes and am not sure what I should do since I basically only have 2 weeks of school left. one of those three I made pass/no pass because there is no way of me passing the class anymore. For my other 2 I still have a good chance of passing with C’s or even B’s on my other 2 classes but with my level of motivation and lack of knowledge it would be hard to impossible.I feel like garbage my parents both went to excellent schools and graduated with outstanding grades. Im just barely scraping by. To make things even worse is that I would have to re-appeal for financial aid due to my lack of credits these past 2 semesters. I’m still technically a incoming sophomore even though I’m already at my 3rd year here. My grades freshman year were really high and luckily I’m not in academic probation but am in probation. Ive accepted my fate of graduating a year later or more but still I don’t know what to do. I’m taking summer classes back home far away from where I am for college. Have you guys personally experienced this, or had a child, friend, etc… go through this? I guess I’m just looking for comfort in my crap life so any advice, negative or positive would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
You need to go to student counseling services to talk about your problems, especially the suicide attempt that appears somewhat buried in line 5 of your post. At the very minimum, you should go through the proper procedures to get those current failing grades converted to Withdrawals. Ideally you need to do that before the semester ends. Hopefully the college counseling office can help you make plans to see someone over the summer as well.
I don’ t have great advice other than to say strangers on the internet are not the best place to seek help. You need some help, and you seem to know that. Do your parents know? They would want to know. I have been through this as the parent, and it can all turn out okay. So if you need to hear that – yes, it can turn out okay.
I see you. I hear your voice. You are not unimportant to the world, and your struggle is real, and so is your pain. But the world and the people around you need you here, in ways you cannot imagine right now. So hang on.
We withdrew my daughter in late March. We knew she was becoming depressed but she kept trying to keep going. She too, was afraid to disappoint us and that could not be further from the truth.
Depression lies to you.
Try student services. Don’t be discouraged if they can’t see you for several weeks. My daughter had to wait 7 weeks to get an appointment and by that time, we got the call from her pleading.
I implore you to speak to someone you trust, hopefully that is a parent. You are our most precious treasure and getting you better is priority one. The rest can be fixed. It is not the end of the world. GPA’s can be made better with Junior college when you are better. But don’t even think about that now. Your mental health is priority one.
If you can go home to be with family, that would be optimal. Let them help you get the help you need.
You are going through what many, many students encounter. You are not alone. You are not worthless and unimportant to the world. Those thoughts are depression lying to you and you need help combating depression. And it is doable.
(((HUGS)))) to you. PM me if you wish. Don’t know what else I can do for you but be a listening ear.
60 days home and therapy once a week has helped my daughter tremendously. She is working 30 hours a week and doing well. She in enrolled in school for fall with the intent of attending if she continues to improve. But she will live at home with us for the first semester to make sure everything stays on track.
I wish you all the best.
You should seek help from professionals and support from your family. You should start with the counseling center and talking to your academic advisor about options for withdrawal etc. You should also talk to your parents – as a mom I can tell you that I would feel horrible if one of my kids had such a severe issue and didn’t talk to me and let me try to help in his/her recovery – parents should love, support, and help kids, even young adult children, through difficult times.
@ottonl…I feel for you and your situation. You are getting excellent advice on this thread. I would suggest you seek professional counseling at your school. Seek help outside your school if your college cannot help. You really need to see someone now! You may be able to take a medical withdrawal from your classes or take Incompletes in your classes. You should apply for a leave of absence. Graduating a year or two later is no big deal. You need to address your depression and set yourself up to move forward. Working or volunteering for a semester or two will give you a whole new perspective. You will come back invigorated and a much better student. Depression is tough as everything you see is inward and all you feel is worthless. Counseling is key and you need to see outside your current situation. Nothing seems worthwhile as you cannot see yourself from any other perspective. You have so many advantages over so many people. With professional help and time you will realize this. Your parents are there to help too and will understand and support your decision for a leave of absence.
I attended an Ivy many moons ago. Went through some very tough times, took a leave, worked a menial job, graduated from the Ivy, and had a great and successful life to date with a wonderful family and no regrets.
Again, the first step is to seek professional counseling ASAP. Good luck to you. In time, you will be offering sage advice to a student in need.