<p>I have a somewhat unusual concern about college. I was planning to become an international student (preparing for TOEFL currently) but after reading internet forums , I couldn't get it out of my head that this might cause a huge struggle just like it did back in middle/high school... Well here it goes. I'm a 20y.o. guy and very freakishly short (only 5'3) and what's worse -not asian, nor latino. I'm actually from eastern europe (russia) and look european, but I come from the area where people are not very tall (for most old people average would be like 5'5 and for the young - 5'7-5'8). I was also under a lot of stress growing up and we were quite poor so food had always been an issue and I sort of had to adjust and survive on very little. It's quite unfortunate and has been bothering me A LOT. This chance I got right is a great opportunity to get out of the mess I'm in and finally become somebody (I have a family member in the states who can help in the first days..) , but I know americans are quite healthy and they like to point out the obvious.. I don't want to be the target of short jokes.. Girlfriend is out of the question already (I've heard girls there are very shallow) so I am really puzzled if I should go or stay where I am .. I'm also very shy and introverted, which is not going to help in any way, but that's how I am. What else.. Im not ugly, well.. maybe even abit above average (I was once rated as an 8 out of 10 in the face, but that could've been a lie...)quite thin (slightly underweight even) yet height spoils everything. I tend to wear the thickest shoes with inserts to look at least 5'5-5'6 which helps with the confidence a little bit.I've also been told my accent is not even russian...Don't know why that is. Anyways..yeah, this sums it up. The thing is -I would go in a heartbeat only if I wasn't so short... If I at least looked asian, then it'd be sort of -natural, people wouldn't expect me to be tall, but with european face I really feel screwed...What do you think I should do?</p>
<p>Don’t let that stop you. 5’ 3" isn’t even freakishly short: I know plenty of people that short, including a professor of mine who is european.</p>
<p>Don’t worry about your height, seriously. As an American girl, I can tell you that we’re not all that shallow- for me, at least, personality is key. Looks are definitely secondary.</p>
<p>I think that you are way too concerned about height. Sure you may be on the shorter side, I believe that Americans are on average about 5’9", but that should not adversely affect your college experience. People will comment on your height every once and a while and they may poke fun at it too, but you should know that they are not doing it to be mean and to actually hurt you, they are having fun. If you learn to roll with the punches and maybe to have some fun with it yourself you should have no problem. I for one do not think of Europeans as being taller than Asians, and I would assume that most Americans feel the same.
The opportunity to attend college in the US is a very great one that can really help you “become somebody”, but it is something that you have to work for. If you are constantly concerned about your appearance and what people think of you, it will be difficult for you to succeed in college. Stop worrying so much and start doing, once people get to know you, your height, accent, and all other distinguishing characteristics won’t matter at all.</p>
<p>Good Luck!</p>
<p>If it makes you feel any better, I have bright red hair, wear glasses, have ghostly white skin, and I have not been made fun of.</p>
<p>Thanks for all the responses guys… I can’t even imagine what it’s going to be like, so I always tend to picture the worst case scenario… I just don’t want to be overlooked again , like it happened in high school. I guess it could be because of my shyness, but sometimes it’s ridiculous when the teacher doesn’t even see you sitting behid the desk…</p>
<p>Well, I think you deserve an honest answer. If you’re 5’3", you will be quite a bit shorter than average in the U.S. You will find that many, if not most, women will be taller than you are. I think people in college probably won’t make fun of you, but they will notice that you’re short, and typically women date guys who are taller than they are–this doesn’t mean that they all do this, but it’s more the norm.</p>
<p>Well, one thing about “making fun.” In the US, at least, it’s common for a group of male friends to joke about things like this among themselves–that’s different from somebody mocking you in public, which isn’t very likely to happen.</p>
<p>“Americans are quite healthy…”</p>
<p>HHAHAHAHAAHAHA. That really made me laugh. As if drive-thru restaurants aren’t enough, we also have drive-thru banks and pharmacies. Yep. </p>
<p>Also, 5’3 is not THAT short. There are plenty of girls that are shorter and would probably go for you. Given you have a nice personality to make up that height. Not a big deal tho, my brother is 5’3 and no one ever made fun of him and he has a family now :D</p>
<p>Hunt, i wish I was never born then…</p>
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Please–while it might be nice if you were a little taller, there are plenty of people with more severe problems than you–get some perspective.</p>
<p>Not to be mean, but your insecurities doesn’t help, LOL. Girls like guys that are confident.</p>
<p>Hunt, it kind of hurts to hear when you put it like that…</p>
<p>Mizzxvii I know what they like…funny confident all that stuf…</p>
<p>You don’t have a speech impediment, you don’t have a facial deformity, you aren’t missing a leg or an eye, you’re teeth aren’t black, you’re short. See what I’m going at? The ones who notice a persons height the most are the people with height problems. If you’re short, that is all you think about when meeting new people. But people who aren’t short really couldn’t care less. We don’t think you’re any less intelligent. 5’3 is not freakishly short. If you were 4’8 then I’d see your dilemma. There are quite a few girls that are shorter than you. Girls that are 5’1 are not uncommon. </p>
<p>Don’t let generalizations about America scare you. If you came as a high school student, you might have felt uncomfortable since some students are uneducated and immature. However, in college you’ll be surrounded by mature and educated students who couldn’t care less about your height.</p>
<p>Don’t be insecure. Change your attitude.</p>
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<p>But he’s right. Being short is hardly a handicap, you’re not even a dwarf or midget. </p>
<p>I know this one kid who’s about your height and also about your size… real skinny guy. Guess what? He’s got quite a few friends, a girlfriend, and a pretty fun life. That’s cos he’s confident and friendly. Trust me, being tall is not a one-way ticket to social acceptance.</p>
<p>Mango15, are you sure tall people don’t care? I always imagine they think something like -“oh look at him…what a loser”…that’s why I’m insecure, I assume everybody else would hate me…</p>
<p>if there are people thinking like that, just ignore them. they might possibly be the type to end up as the scum of the earth… haha. </p>
<p>but seriously, find yourself a good group of friends and everything will be fine. look at me. i got a good group of friends in college and nobody cares that i’m the shortest one of them all.</p>
<p>As a 6 foot 6 guy, I can tell you that I almost never think strangely of a guy’s height unless he’s well below 5 feet tall or something. Hell at least you can fit in places. Try stuffing my ass into a cramped car or amusement park ride. Try speaking with people at loud, crowded clubs where practically anything anyone says is miles below you, out of earshot. It’s not like tall people necessarily have better luck with women, either.</p>
<p>What matters is your personality and that you take care of yourself. If you’re well put-together and you just so happen to be short, girls won’t care, especially if you’re fun to be around/funny/intelligent/etc. </p>
<p>I have <em>tons</em> of guy friends who are your height and have absolutely zero trouble with women, and it’s not like they’re massively outgoing alphamales or anything. They’re just not insecure about their height. When you stop caring about such silly things, you’ll suddenly notice other people stop, too. 
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<p>Yes, women prefer to date taller, but that’s like saying guys prefer bigger boobs to no boobs or a perfect body to an OK body, or a smart girl to a dumb girl, etc. Having height is icing on the cake, but it’s not the whole cake, certainly.</p>
<p>Seriously, quit worrying about your height. If a girl is going to reject you by height alone, even if you’re a great guy… forget about her and move on to someone less superficial. Think of your height as a *****filter at worst.</p>
<p>Just have fun with it, learn to poke a little fun at yourself, and don’t be so self-conscious about crap nobody else really cares about anyway. You’re just going to torture yourself over nothing otherwise. We’re all self conscious about something.</p>
<p>Amen, nexus, amen!</p>
<p>OP, everyone has their flaws, not just you. I have short legs and I’m dam proud of it! =D</p>
<p>NexusOne…I’m not exactly funny or fun to be around… so personality wise -i’m quite boring… But thanks for your insight on the situation. It really heps knowing that other people may not care as much as I imagine…</p>
<p>I’m a 5’6 girl and I can assure you that no one will think you’re a loser or not intelligent just because of your height. You will be respected just as much as anyone else. A loser is the 5’9 guy who wears a fitted hat and a basketball jersey and yells out at you “hey cutie”. It has much more to do with your attitude and personality than your height.</p>