To echo some points, though I don’t want to sound mean about it. I am not sure what you were expecting to happen. If they said a tour is for admitted students only, take them at their word. If you need an explanation why, consider what would happen if many people showed up who weren’t invited.
This is unprofessional on her part, but irrelevant to your decision.
On a side note, I sometimes blame the entertainment industry for setting up the expectation that if you’re excited enough, you should never take no for an answer, whether pursuing a job, an investor, a school, or a romantic interest. I mean almost all the time, a lack of enthusiasm from your subject is not a test of earnestness, but a hint that you should look elsewhere.
Finally, good luck with your more promising pursuits. Don’t sweat it and chalk it up to experience.
I really want my 10 minutes of wasted time back. I thought there would be something to suggest the OP was in the right or truly aggrieved in some way and kept reading. Shame on my.
OP, please post the name of the school–while I probably wouldn’t have handled it the same way they did for just 2 families in the group, I have great admiration for their enforcement of the rules. Kudos to them.
Showing up uninvited, explicitly told not to come, in the middle of a pandemic, at a private institution - I don’t know why anyone would expect different.
If the OP wants to name the school, they can. If they want to ignore the request, that’s OK, too. For everyone else, however, let’s refrain from the guessing games on a site called College Confidential.
Geez people kinda harsh here. I think the OP is a really good writer and had me interested the whole way through… I liked the journey. (yes, I know they shouldn’t of gone but still)…
I agree that people are being a little meaner than necessary. The writing was OK, though it could have used some editing for such a simple, unsurprising outcome.
I found it entertaining… I mean no one here ever break the rules? Yes,maybe not the smartest during Covid… That I wouldn’t do. But during a lunch (pre-planned… Lol) on Northwesterns campus we (my son), took a walk and noticed a tour group. So, we went to the back and tagged along. When it was done I thanked the student guide that told me it happens all the time… Lol…
Break the rules- sure, I left my car for half an hour in a “unloading only- 15 minutes maximum” spot last week. But would I be able to complain if I got a parking ticket at minute 20? No I would not. There was a legible sign explaining the rule, and I understand that when you overstay a parking space there’s a possibility of an expensive ticket as the penalty.
Break the rules- yes. And when you get caught you keep your lip zipped and suffer the consequences.
Would you have still done it if a meterperson were there telling you not to after you asked if you could as you parked?
All of us will break some rule at some point, esp if one starts considering speed limits. But to break one after asking and being point blank told X is a totally different deal.
If I were the one who had explained the rule only to see someone purposely ignore what I said I’d be livid. When this happens in my classes at school I definitely deal with it. It’s not a trait most places want to see TBH. I’d never hire someone - or accept them - if they thought it was ok, esp if they posted “woe is me” about it later.
If it’s cathartic, then I honestly don’t see the harm in writing about it. I respect rules, but I also have a lot of life experience to draw on. Hopefully, this will be a good lesson for an 18 year old and they’ll adjust their future expectations of just being able to get away with stuff. It’s certainly better to have this happen in a relatively safe context.
I don’t think Knowsstuff meant she SHOULD have broken the rules; rather, she/he merely pointed out the harshness (and snark - which I thought was prohibited by TOS…?) from some of the comments. That, IMO, unnecessary (in this case). At least, that was my interpretation.
I also don’t quite understand the implication that the school was not being altruistic. Protecting public health and the health/safety of those under your care (in this case, on-campus students and admitted students) is not exactly lacking in altruism.
Failing to help you in some way had you been in a personal emergency not of your own doing might have shown a lack of altruism, but this? Informing you before your trip that you wouldn’t be allowed on the tour was a kindness…it was you and your father who chose to overstep and make assumptions. You put yourself in that position, not Amelia.
I think this has nothing to do with elite college admisssions. Non-elite colleges have rules and safety standards too. The title should read something like “A Cautionary Tale About Deliberately Breaking Rules.”
I’m sorry you were disappointed with the college’s decision. It sounds like your junior year grades were low for this school, so a waitlist offer is a better outcome than I expected.
I don’t know what you mean by the college trusting “an in-perfect process over the community standards and honor it strives to promote.” Colleges are academic institutions first. Some students hope their ECs will make up for their lowish GPAs, but that’s rarely the case.
I think that one of the lessons here is that it’s important to understand marketing. It sounds like you thought the college was singling you out for special attention. The marketing department is entirely separate from admissions. The marketing tools you describe are fairly common. They’re not meant to imply what the admissions team thinks about a particular applicant.
I’m not surprised about how your visit turned out. You basically told the person who coordinates the tours that you had traveled to the area to crash an admitted students tour after having been told more than once that it wasn’t permitted, and when she reiterated the rules you pushed back to explain why they shouldn’t apply to you. It wasn’t a very nice thing to do to the student tour guide or the other families who were booked for the tour. The takeaway here is that your wishes aren’t more important than the rules set by the college (or a prospective employer). And firmness doesn’t equal rudeness.
Lol,don’t think anyone has to analyze what I said… Lol. @blossom your a radical… … I actually liked the story as a story. Wasn’t even sure it was real but the OP posted before… The lesson maybe can help someone else, I don’t know but more gardening to do today. Lovely day…
I guess my main takeaway from this thread is that the waitlisted student, by this behavior, just made it a certainty they would never get admitted to the school.
Sometimes it’s ok to push boundaries, but this had a bigger consequence than just being denied a tour.
Along with anyone else reading…
… I actually liked the story as a story. Wasn’t even sure it was real but the OP posted before… The lesson maybe can help someone else, I don’t know but more gardening to do today. Lovely day… 