Wonderful to have a kid able to acknowledge the poignant moments in life, as well as express thanks to his parents.
Seeing the offspring get together with friends when back for holidays and catching up with those friends myself is one of the joys of those intimate circles. In my Ds HS group, one twins’ college roommate married one of the childhood friends, so there is double networking. A bookgroup started with the moms from the first grade soccer team now 25 years ago and we still meet monthly. In the past few years, some of our offspring have started their own zoom book group. The pandemic with the prevalence of zoom seem to have brought some of the old friend circles closer.
My brother recently turned 60. He and four kindergarten buddies just spent a week at one of their vacation homes ( so jealous…incredible home….he rents it out when not in use…… for 5k to 30k a NIGHT(!) depending on season). My brother e still talks to all of them regularly…like weekly . One of them ( the house owner) he talks to pretty much daily.
Lol having my college senior home over winter break and seeing her friends great, she called me on the way home from the gym asking if I wanted a latte from an expensive coffee shop, how considerate and yes, a few minutes later my card charged popped up $15. At least the latte was good and she enjoyed hers.
Ds2 has a group of ride-or-dies from elementary and middle school. They are the nucleus for a fantasy sport league. When they were in HS and college, the draft was in person and then remote, but a year after they graduated they figured they could afford to live a little now that they had jobs so they moved to an in-person draft with remote drafting for those who can’t make it. Each year’s winner gets to pick the locale for the next draft. So far, they have been to Portland, Chicago, Denver and other places I can’t remember. This year’s winner decided to have it in the guys’ hometown, and they said they may do a moms’ brunch on Sunday! That would be delightful. I am beyond excited!
Some guys who were in the league who have dropped out for various reasons still come to the weekend because it’s so fun. I think last year they had a dozen guys.
I have a feeling, OP, that this is how your son’s friendships will evolve. Different? Yes. Still treasured? Absolutely. I keep thinking that once one of them gets engaged they will plan the wedding for draft weekend since they’ll all be together anyway.
Everyone is different, but my sense is that is your son has maintained such a strong bond with these friends through college, they are likely to remain tight forever.
My D20 has pulled away from many in her high school friend group, really only maintaining direct contact with a couple of friends. I think she is an example of someone who mostly had friends of convenience/proximity in high school, but now seems to have found her tribe in college. She currently feels less of a connection to one of her best friends from high school (that girl is at a big southern school, very into greek life and tailgating, while my D is at a small urban school with a very different culture), but I think of my own experience and keep hope alive that they will be friends forever, in some fashion or another.
With my high school best friend - we stayed close throughout college, but then kind of took different paths right after (she moved to a city a few hours from our hometown and got on the yuppie (remember them?) track immediately. I packed up a van with my (then) boyfriend (now husband) and drove to Oregon where I lived for a few years in a much less ambitious existence We never lost touch, but we were definitely not as close as our lives had little in common for those years. Once our lives had more similarities again (weddings, babies, careers), we grew closer again. I only see her once or twice a year, but we have the best, deepest conversations when we connect. I know she’ll be in my life forever.
I’m 41 and my bestie from kindergarten lives on a different continent; we had many-many wonderful memories since we became adults - as she was babysitting my kids when I was studying abroad, and we still call each other for birthdays and see each other once a year and can’t stop talking when we get together. Our lives and interests are very different and it’s now what makes it so interesting.
My nephew has a class reunion party every year just before Christmas- for his 8th grade class! One of the girls organizes it. Many of them have moved away but are home for Christmas and their parents still live in the neighborhood.
We never lost touch, but we were definitely not as close as our lives had little in common for those years. Once our lives had more similarities again (weddings, babies, careers), we grew closer again. I only see her once or twice a year, but we have the best, deepest conversations when we connect. I know she’ll be in my life forever.