Advice about weed issue

One of my foster kids goes to TCU now. She is a great kid and gets full scholarship. She lives in dorm but was studying with a friend at her house and friend suggested that they should use her boyfriend’s weed to take care of anxiety and insomnia. They did and later her friend was driving her to the dorm. Police stopped them for some traffic reason and smelled marijuana, they searched the car, didn’t find anything but reported to TCU. She has a disciplinary committee meeting on Monday. She is scared that they’ll takeaway her scholarship or dorm privileges. She asked me for advice. I have no idea. Anyone with similar experience or any advice)

How is it that they reported it to TCU. Were they stopped on campus? It is a private school and if the police were really employees of the school I can understand but if not, seems like her rights were violated.

Deny, deny, deny. There is no law against a car smelling like weed. She was a passenger in a friend’s car. That’s it. No charges, no evidence. Why did she tell him where she goes to school. This is beyond ridiculous.

I can’t say. I was in a meeting so I didn’t ask for all details. I just told her that I’ll look into it over the weekend but for now she should focus on her classes.

She said they were smelling like weed themselves too.

For two years that she was with us, we always told her that lying is wrong.

Well all the police had a right to do was search car and check driver for impairment. What is the basis of the disciplinary hearing? I don’t know about them but there are rights. You should look into those and see what exactly is the basis for the hearing, in writing.

I said it on your other thread: Lawyer up. How stupid is the friend for driving under the influence of drugs!

Tell your kid to make better friends or sooner or later she can kiss that sweet scholarship and bright future goodbye.

Well, legally she isn’t my kid. Why would she need a lawyer to go to school meeting, they don’t allow guardians or lawyers.

Is her friend a student at the school? Is she also up for a disciplinary hearing? Has she or the friend given a statement to the police or anyone in the school about whether she smoked or not?

Is your kid in good academic standing otherwise? No other previous disciplinary actions at college or in high school? (They can go back an look at her application to see if she reported disciplinary action there if they concerned about whether this is a pattern.)

Lying is a bad idea but TCU may have policies about drug use and the consequences that are out of proportion to the offense. At many schools, they’d have to expel the entire student body for trying pot but we don’t know TCU. It should be in the student handbook or on-line resource. She needs to know how the school views this.

Does she have a faculty advisor or mentor at the school who can give her advice on how TCU has handled this in the past?

I know that friend is her class fellow and they said yes to police. My foster kid has a clean record, never in any trouble before. Lived with us for two years of high school, never gave us a reason to complaint other then having insomnia and not getting enough sleep.

Did you review TCU’s policy?

http://www.police.tcu.edu/Alcohol%20Use%20Policy.htm

"the minimum penalty for a first-time violation of the Drug Abuse Policy for use or possession of a prescription drug or controlled substance will be disciplinary probation for a full year and a requirement for participation in a drug abuse education and/or treatment program. "

Also if she has anxiety/insomnia, she should get treated by a physician. I think it would be helpful if she got medical help and then told the committee she has taken steps to address those issues in a healthier way.

If it’s only a probation and counseling then wouldn’t it be better to face it so she never falls for it again? Lying may get her off but that then she may not learn the lesson?

Do they also have fines in place? My son’s first college used some questionable tactics to collect fines, even though the students could never have faced criminal charges, they were off campus, and it was based on a security guard “smelling” weed. Parents didn’t try to fight too hard, since the fines were less than any lawyer would have charged and nobody wanted to make additional waves. It did seem like a shake-down, and was apparently pretty commonplace at a financially-strapped institution.

Everything is expensive at TCU so probably they’ll cash this as well.

Apparently, I was wrong. Everyone at school told her that school is very helpful and makes sure that students don’t fall again, that is if offender has no history, no legal issue and is ready to do her part.

Good luck to her. Hope it works out ok.

My D had a similar experience when she as in college (transported to the hospital when she passed out from drinking). She was refered to the college disciplinary board and was required to attend alcohol education seminar and counseling. It ended up being a positive experience for her. She definitely learned her lesson about drinking to excess and she continued counseling off and on throughout college for various issues, mostly anxiety related.

I would advise telling the truth and taking the consequences. Too many people in our society try to blame others and lie to avoid punishment. Admitting your mistakes is a sign of maturity. That’s not to say that she shouldn’t appeal the punishment if it seems too harsh or not fitting to the infraction - but I wouldn’t advise lying.