Hi- my fist time posting! I did some searches but didn’t see a thread that answered my question. My S (junior) has a strong academic background- 35 ACT, challenging curriculum with AP classes, straight A’s and attending a rigorous public school. He wants to pursue a competitive engineering program. Here is the challenge- other than being an eagle scout, he has fairly limited extracurriculars. This is partly due to our decision to emphasize academics over a lot of other activity, but even more due to family responsibilities that he has. He has a younger brother with significant disabilities, and takes care of him before and after school each day because of my husband and my work schedules. So here is my question- will top schools take that into consideration when looking at his application, or is the lack of ECs going to cause his chances to be harmed? At this point, I think it is too late to try to sign him up for every club on campus, and I think the experience of caring for a loved one has made him a stronger person. Thoughts or advice on how to approach applications?
Top schools will more than certainly honor the ways in which he has helped his brother and family. This is the kind of thing the very selective schools are really looking at these days and it most certainly speaks to “character,” a big factor in admissions. (Of course being an eagle scout is nothing to sneeze at either.) He needs to treat caring for his brother as an EC, honestly, or ask the schools how best to represent it. He sounds like a great kid and I am sure he will and in a school he will be happy with.
Looking ahead, is it going to be difficult for him to leave his brother and family and will your family be okay without him? I would think the transition to college may be more complicated than it is for many young people. He deserves whatever good things happen for him!
Hi- thanks so much for the advice. I know I’m biased, but he is an amazingly empathetic and kind person.
To answer your question, I’m not too sure how he will react. He and his brother adore each other. But, part of me wants him to experience ‘normal’ life, so I’m actually happy for him to go to any college that makes him happy. It will definitely be an adjustment for all of us, but a natural evolution for us as a family.
I hadn’t thought to include the care giving as an EC. We were actually worrying that we should have treated it as a paid position (including paying taxes etc.) so that he could get credit for it, but I feel very strongly against monetizing the care you give a family member.
Thanks again compmom!
I think your son helping to take care his younger brother speaks volumes about his character and I think would be as impressive, if not more, than kids who accumulate EC’s for the purposes of college applications. He should definitely include that somewhere in his college apps.
Your son sounds like a fabulous human being! I feel like Eagle Scout is such a marker for excellence, I can’t imagine he will have a hard time gaining attention.
@chaphillmom: I agree with what has already been written by others, and I’ll add that your son should make sure that his HS counselor is aware of all the details of the care that he provides his brother (time, what they do, etc.) so that he/she can include that in the LOR.
Achieving Eagle Scout and caring for a younger brother with significant disabilities do count as significant extracurricular activities. (And if either or both involve designing something to help with the task, that can tie into interest in engineering.)
Yes, definitely make the guidance counselor aware. The GC can write about this in his or her recommendation. You or your son could also ask the schools how best to handle this on the application. The supplementary essay (about what the schools haven’t learned about you from other parts of the application) is another place to write about his responsibilities.
Thanks everyone- some great advice. I hadn’t thought to have him go over this with his GC. And- for clarification- I didn’t intend to say that eagle scout was a minor accomplishment. It’s a great thing! I just was worried that compared to a lot of students that have massive lists of ECs that his would look very narrow.
Along the lines of what @ucbalumnus said, highlighting how he came up with ways to make caring for his brother easier/better which would be a great way to show problem solving/innovation skills. It doesn’t have to be a physical thing (although that would definitely be relevant to engineering) but it could be anything, like a way to teach his brother something or help him feel more involved or deal with an emotional setback, manage his meds, etc.
He sounds like a wonderful person. Best of luck!
I think his ECs sound fine.
Caring for siblings was mentioned specifically as something that “counts” and that one should definitely include on the application at several info sessions we’ve attended at highly selective colleges.
Schools like the Ivies have emphasized this. They also included working to help the family financially.
Massive lists of extracurriculars may not be particularly impressive compared to the level of achievement in any. What is more impressive, achieving Eagle Scout or joining 20 school-based clubs without any notable achievement in any of them?
Note that some engineering problems involve improving processes and services, rather than only designing things. So any improvement he came up with in the area of caring for his brother would be applicable to engineering.
Re “I just was worried that compared to a lot of students that have massive lists of ECs that his would look very narrow.”- we had a few college info sessions say they don’t really pay much regard to people who suddenly sign up for a whole bunch of things in junior year as it’s obvious it’s just being done for the college applications. They’d rather see fewer ECs with longer and deeper commitment. So again - your son should be fine on this front. Good luck.
Great kid with great ECs. Definitely needs to write about his care of his brother in his college apps- that is an “EC” just as needing to work instead of joining clubs. Being an Eagle scout involved a lot as well. Do not worry about his nonacademic time- he has shown success. I think part of the EC bit is to show a student can handle more than just the schoolwork. You emphasized academics- kudos to you- and your son has done much more.
Someone mentioned the effect of his leaving home for college. That is part of life. You sound as though you plan on it- great. His choice of schools to apply to will be influenced by family finances- do not presume there will be merit money at the schools of interest to him. His choices should not be made based on coming home to help with family, from your post it sounds like this is not in the plans. Be sure your son understands that he has no family obligations when it comes to comes to college. He needs to get the best education for him, not one that includes caring for his brother.
There are so many good engineering options. Be sure you do not fall into the trap of thinking only the schools listed by CC’ers are the best. Many public flagships have top programs- and where you look depends on your state. You also should be sure he is not locked into a major- who knows, math or physics may be more his thing and he may decide after starting college. He will find plenty of academic peers at many top tier schools, especially in fields like engineering.
Quality, not quantity. Your son hits the mark with both of his activities. The only thing you might do is ask him if there are any activities he would like to do if he had the time instead of taking care of his brother. Eventually you will need to outsource care taking of your other son so now could be the time to consider how that will be done. Easing your oldest son out of this job may also make it easier for him to transition to college without guilt for not being there.
Sounds like you are doing a great job- balance for both kids.
My S19 has similar academic stats with “just” a 4 year sport and music as his ECs. He’s not applying to the top 20 schools but is looking at ranked CS programs. We will see how it shakes out since we had the same concern. It sounds like your DS has a very solid background and activities that show great character. I would think hes in a strong position. Does he have any schools in mind?
Is he at all interested in a service academy? Just the few things you list hit big on several of the categories the academies look for: academics, leadership, character/integrity. I know the SAs do not appeal to everyone but, if your son has any interest, the academies highly value what he already demonstrates. They emphasize quality over quantity and are not impressed by long lists of ECs. His Eagle Scout rank would earn him top points in their leadership category and is precisely the type of “narrowness” they are looking for. If he is in good physical shape and participates in any sport at all (any level), he might have a good shot at one of them.
I wanted to mention that Drexel - which is extremely expensive - has a dual enrollment agreement with the local community college. Basically, you can do core courses at the community college (the lab sciences are rumored to be superior) and then have guaranteed transfer. It depends on if you think he will get merit or need-based aid as a freshman. They also have an agreement with a Maryland community college if you are down there. I’ve known people who started at Drexel who then transfer to community college with the intention of saving money and going back. The atmosphere on both campuses is similar so it’s not such a hardship.