Advice On My Circumstances

Paying for College
1

I hope this is in the right section.

Hello. I am a CC lurker and have finally made an account. I need some serious advice.

I was going to apply to Richard Bland College of William and Mary, because of my poor financial situation.

My parents will not allow me to get a job or take out loans for college. I can’t even save in the bank because they will use the money or take it (I am 17). I can’t secretly get a job because my parents refuse to teach me how to drive.

As for my parent’s financial situation, neither or them have jobs and they declared bankruptcy. They have terrible financial habits. Instead of thinking of ways to save, my mother just says something good will happen/come.

This is why even going to a community college is a financial issue for me. I know many others have problems with finances too, so I really need advice.

I have 38 (if I complete senior as I have like the others) transferable college credits from AP/Dual Enrollment. This is assuming I wont get good AP scores so I might get more.

That aside, I wanted to do the guaranteed transfer to William and Mary or another/cheaper partner school. On the agreement for this, I have to get 45 credits from RB rather than transfer them in, but at Mary Washington and other partners I think it said I can tranfer up to 90 for a bachelor degree. The only issue with that is that (please don’t laugh) I want to go to law school and need to get into the best college possible to be able to go to graduate. (This was according to my internship attorney).

Please help me make a decision before summer is over.

TLDR:

  1. I am broke and can’t afford college.

  2. I will go to community college, but might not be able to afford it, because I cant take loans or a job.

  3. I will have 38 transferable credits to college, but this may hurt my chances for future law school due to the fact that WM will not accept all tranferable ones.

  4. I need advice.

Side note: I will be applying to all Scholarships I can catch my eyes on.

I can post stats if that will help my case for advice, though I rather focus on solving this.

Thank you so much! [-O<

2

*Also, sorry for grammar issues and problems.

3

Can you talk to a guidance counselor at school without your parents knowing?

4

not “guidance” but a college counselor I meant

5

Not really. My guidance counselor calls my parents each time we have a session. My parents don’t like it when I talk about us being poor. They wouldnt sign up for reduced lunch nor reduced AP prices.

Oh, saw your other post. I don’t think so. I don’t have transportation.

Thanks for the response though.

6

When do you turn 18?

Can you sign up for free lunch without them knowing? Do you have access to any necessary info?

Can you switch counselors or tell the counselor not to contact your parents?

If your parents are bankrupt and don’t work, how do they support the family?

Will your parents allow you to submit a FAFSA?

Did they file a 2015 tax return?

What are your stats?

Do you have siblings?

7

I would suggest you seek out the school psychologist or social worker at your school. They should be able to confidentially talk to you.

If your oarents will complete a FAFSA for you, you would be able to get the $5500 Direct Loan. Would that cover your community college courses?

If your parents have $0 income…how are they paying your day to day living expenses…housing, utilities, food, etc? I’m not asking yountomoayyou here…but if they complete a FAFSA and indicate $0’for income…the colleges will most likely select you for verification…and the colleges will want this answer.

What is your SAT score? What is your GPA? These could guide you towards college based scholarships…which really are the best.

If your oarents have $0 for income, how would,they be able to help you with college costs from their money? But if they will complete the financial aid application forms, you could net some need based aid. Will they do the FAFSA…and the Profile forms?

8

If you have free/reduced lunch you can get two fee waivers for SAT, you can send 4 free scores, get application fee waivers, CSS profile (financial aid application) fee waivers.

That is a lot of money that could be saved.

At our HS you don’t know who is on reduced lunch. All the kids have lunch numbers they punch in and nobody should know how much money is subtracted from the lunch account.

9

What are your stats? Those are needed for best advice.

When do you turn 18?

I’ve never heard of a GC calling parents every time a student talks to them… Talk to your GC, and ask if the convo can be just between the two of you (no calling parents).

10

This is all so weird. If your parents have no jobs, where does the money come from? Do they accept aid for themselves, but just wont let you get free lunch? Do you buy lunch? Where did the money come from for your APs and dual enrollment?

When do you turn 18?

The counselor always going to your parents is also weird. Find someone else at your school who will respect your situation. A vice principal or someone suggested psychologist maybe.

11

@flatKansas

Around here, dual enrollment courses are paid for by the HS. Don’t know if that is true for OP or not.

Lots of unanswered questions in this OP. Hoping the poster comes back and answers at least some of them.

12

I can offer some insight to other posters on CC based on my experience with a young man we mentored. At the high school he attended (in NJ) he was considered a minor in the eyes of the school even after he turned 18 (6 months before graduation). This meant he could not sign himself out of school, any changes he made to his schedule, any college communications etc. went thru his parents. (things were different in the 80s, we could sign ourselves out at 18)

He was having extreme problems (emotional abuse, not allowing him to get a job, throwing out his college acceptance letters, enforcing a 7PM curfew on an honors student with no drug/alcohol use, removal of internet/phone access, bugs added to his phone/internet etc). This was just the tip of the iceberg. I may have doubted him had he not being on Skype with my daughter when some of these conversations with his parents happened. I had firsthand interactions with the parents as well, plus what my own eyes were showing me. In his case, the parents are both receiving government assistance in the form of SS Disability, and I believe the change in attitude toward him had something to do with them not getting money for him after he turned 18. They also have mental health issues.

We decided to get involved, and this is when we found out that even though he was 18, he was considered a minor. Yes, the guidance counselor called his mother. No, the GC really was of no help, and plainly stated her fear (real or imagined I don’t know) that the school could get sued if they interfered, and since the abuse was not physical it was “he said she said” and she wouldn’t do anything. It was so incredibly frustrating and mind blowing. Of course since he was a minor, we were not allowed to talk with the GC without his parents’ permission.

My point in sharing this is that some parents just suck beyond belief. In fact, because it is so beyond belief that people don’t believe(who would do this to their own child? Who punishes a kid after they win a big scholarship?! these people did!)

We were lucky that our mentee had a gym/health teacher who saw the impact it was clearly having on him and agreed to write a letter that supported the dependency overrride we got him. Too often though I think these type of students are not believed, and are afraid to really reach out for fear of repercussion from their parents.It is not something a lot of us can wrap our heads around, but sadly and heartbreakingly, it does happen.

My advice to the OP is to cultivate teachers and friends parents to get support. Eventually you are likely going to have to do as our mentee did and move out in order to improve your situation. You will need documentation and letters in order to apply to college as an independent student, so I suggest strongly that you start moving toward that now.

13

@thumper1 Oh interesting! Here our dual enrollment costs us 90-100$ per credit hour.

14

You will turn 18, and then you can get a basic federal student loan without a parent signature. However, it is going to be hard to get any financial aid if your parents do not fill out their part of the FAFSA. The parents financial info is typically required for students under age 24, and a basic student loan might cover tuition at Richard Bland but not room and board and living expenses.

One way to be free of your parents is to become an emancipated minor: talk to your attorney mentor about that. That way, your parents would not have to file a FAFSA for you to get aid. But, once you are emancipated from them, you will have to have a place to live until you can graduate, get financial aid, and move into a college dorm.

If you are not able to be emancipated before age 18, you will need to find a way to document your situation. Some ideas to consider: Report yourself to a teen crisis line. Talk to a social worker or maybe a doctor (a doctor has to keep patient confidentiality but also has to report vulnerable minors to child protective services). Are there any teachers, a different guidance counselor, extended family, parents of your friends at school that might help you? You will need to have some basis for appealing to the school financial aid office for professional judgement that you are independent of your parents and that trying to get the parents’ FAFSA is a waste of time.

15

@NJRoadie

I worked in a school. School employees are mandatory reporters to CPS if they even suspect any kind of abuse, and it does not have to be physical…or witnessed. It can be reported only.

Shame on that school counselor. The reality is that she was MORE liable if something had happened if she didn’t report than by not reporting.

In every state I know of, this counselor absolutely was required to report the reported mental abuse.

16

I will reply to each of these comments when I get time. Sorry. I will begin from the top. Thank you for the replies.

17

When do you turn 18?
Feb 1st of 2017

Can you sign up for free lunch without them knowing? Do you have access to any necessary info?
I can ask for another packet like I got last year. I honestly didn’t read the whole thing as many times I have worked through lunch and like many kids just didn’t eat. I thought it would be a good idea if it was free however.

Can you switch counselors or tell the counselor not to contact your parents?

I actually have (student said) the best counselor at the school. It’s more because my parents are friendly with him and he is talkative. If I switch I may get one of the really terrible ones (like giving a tenth grader a senior schedule or missing sol (I am in VA) courses that are needed to graduate). Another reason I think they talk so much is to get me to take harder classes.

If your parents are bankrupt and don’t work, how do they support the family?

I really dont know. I know they take from their retirement fund but my mom said it is nearly empty. My dad buys cars and sells them to people for some quick cash sometimes, but otherwise I think they take from relatives. Honestly, I dont know. We lost our house and moved to our grandfathers paid one, but can barely pay city taxes. Oh they both are trying for disability. My dad lost his leg to diabetes and is losing is sight. My mom got hurt (worked for factory) and was laid off.

Will your parents allow you to submit a FAFSA?
I know my mother fills it out and doesn’t want children to. I hope that is what you mean and I answered it right. She always late with stuff like that (I have an older sister in the same situation).

Did they file a 2015 tax return?
I think so. Yes.

What are your stats?
They aren’t that great, but here. Please tell me if you need me to add stuff.

SAT: (hasn’t come in yet)
ACT: 25
APUSH: 5
APW: 3
Perfect 600 American History SOL
(Cant think of other tests)
GPA: 4.399/3.888
Rank: 5th (may change)

I can list all classes if asked, but I will just put grades for AP and Dual Enrollment for now.

AP World: 93 A
AP Ushistory: 95 A
Dual Enrollment English: 94/96/97/99
Dual PreCal: 94/98
(Every 9wks was a different class)

My school started offering more next year and I have all AP/dual (but one) next year. I am in all advanced/honors classes for other things not listed.

Extracurricular
-Model UN
-ystreet

  • Library Volunteer
    -SODA (aiding elementary students)
    -Scholastic Bowl/ Quiz Bowl (Co-Captain)
  • History Club
    -Robotics (Head Journalist)
    Girl’s State (Senator/News Reporter/delegate)
  • Junior States of America (Secretary/President)
    -Student Body President (elected Junior year to be in role senior year)
    -SAGE (students aiding international learning)
    -Forensics
    -National Honor Society (have accumulated over 50 hours of service)
    -Student Council (Secretary)
    -Creative Writing Group (lettered)

Awards/other
William and Mary Leadership Award
Poetic Power winner (x2 not really a big deal or hard contest)
Forenics 2nd place regionals
Robotics Inspire Award regionals
Academic letter
Usher (Top 12 in class)
Letter in creative Writing, schobo, and forensics (qualified for sports award (dont remember name) as these are considered sports)
JSA chapter founder for school
Have had an internship with Attorney
Can’t think of anything else right now.

I am an African American female and the only one in my grade in the top 12. I also tend to be the only one in advanced classes. I am not aware of any other claimed heritage.

This is throughout 9th to Now. I can put it in order if that is better.

Do you have siblings?
Yes. I have an other sister who lives with us. She is in the same circumstance as us. My mother removed her book money she got from a scholarship to pay bills. The only odd difference is that she is allowed to have a job.

18

I would suggest you seek out the school psychologist or social worker at your school. They should be able to confidentially talk to you.

The only psychologist at my school I am aware of is the one for gifted and talented students. I was accepted into that. I will see if I can find one SW. I didn’t think of that.

If your oarents will complete a FAFSA for you, you would be able to get the $5500 Direct Loan. Would that cover your community college courses?
It should, the amount for all is 5,572. Can they decide against it? My sister should have this than unless her scholarship off set it . . .? It might be because everything in my family happen so quickly and my parents filed late.

If your parents have $0 income…how are they paying your day to day living expenses…housing, utilities, food, etc? I’m not asking yountomoayyou here…but if they complete a FAFSA and indicate $0’for income…the colleges will most likely select you for verification…and the colleges will want this answer.
See the other answer. I dont know how else to put it as I don’t really know whats going on. I know neither have jobs. I know they declared bankruptcy.

What is your SAT score? What is your GPA? These could guide you towards college based scholarships…which really are the best.
See above. They aren’t good enough for the best scholarships, but I will apply anyhow. I know some local ones I can get as long as the guidance head doesn’t give them all to one person (her son) like previous.

If your oarents have $0 for income, how would,they be able to help you with college costs from their money? But if they will complete the financial aid application forms, you could net some need based aid. Will they do the FAFSA…and the Profile forms?
I know they can’t, that’s why I have wanted a job for some time now. Unless that’s part of FAFSA I dont know what the last part is. I don’t know too much about FAFSA to be honest.

19

If you have free/reduced lunch you can get two fee waivers for SAT, you can send 4 free scores, get application fee waivers, CSS profile (financial aid application) fee waivers.

I know! I tried to convince my parents but they wouldn’t do it. There are more benefits than I imagined.

That is a lot of money that could be saved.

At our HS you don’t know who is on reduced lunch. All the kids have lunch numbers they punch in and nobody should know how much money is subtracted from the lunch account.

At mine you do, but half the school is (it feels like anyway). The lunch ladies announce it or you have to remind them or they charge (happen to a friend).

20

What are your stats? Those are needed for best advice.
See above. If you guide me I can try to add more.

When do you turn 18?
See above. Feb 1st.

I’ve never heard of a GC calling parents every time a student talks to them… Talk to your GC, and ask if the convo can be just between the two of you (no calling parents).

I dont think it’s intentional that he does it. I guess I made it sound like that. It’s more like he talks to them regularly (phone/sees them) and he speaks about it I guess. My parents seem to always know.