African American Students in Boarding School

Prep School Admissions Prep School Parents
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<p>I am the parent of a senior, African American BS student and as such, I found the thoughts and comments in this thread particularly interesting.</p>

<p>MrsWeasley’s point in the second post rings true to our son’s experience. There are absolutely vast mixtures of kids that form relationships across all cultural and national lines at his school. These friendships are often the result of shared interests, personality traits and good old-fashioned chemistry.</p>

<p>However, I would guard against using the dining hall litmus test or any other public gatherings as an indication of the schools’ success or failure to promote and foster cross-cultural social interactions. Assuming there is no structured dining requirements that randomly determine student seating kids are going to associate with whomever they please. The congregation of all blacks at a table is no more indicative of the schools’ failure that to promote cross-cultural exchanges than that of all Chinese students at the next table.</p>

<p>The truth is, human beings tend to socialize in a way that is most comfortable to them. It is not unusual for individuals for whom shared cultured experiences exist to use those familial relationships as anchors in an ever-changing, often confusing world. Boarding schools are not bubbles but rather, they are microcosms of the world at large. If Korean students huddle to discuss the implication of the daughter of an assassinated dictator as a viable South Korean presidential candidate, perhaps this may be a conversation that these students feel most comfortable having amongst themselves. The same may hold true if a group of African American students offer their opinions on the outcome of the Travon Martin murder trial.</p>

<p>But keep in mind, these public gatherings do not necessarily provide a glimpse into an interpersonal relationship exchanges that may occur later that day on the south lawn or in the dorm; a conversation between two friends, one black, one white, as they bear their experiences about untimely/unfair romantic breakups or about overbearing parents who often fail to see or understand their children beyond the confines of their own myopic views or any other challenges they may face as human beings in general and adolescents in particular, regardless of racial, national or socioeconomic lines of demarcation. </p>

<p>And while we’re on the subject of socioeconomic distinctions, who cares if groups of students are viewed as “the scholarship ones”? Only in an a bizzaro-world, alternate universe can a young person who has been evaluated and vetted by an institution, received an enthusiastic thumbs up based upon their academic competency and character history, and has been financially rewarded for their endeavors in an effort to further promote their intellectual and personal growth, can being the recipient of scholarships be viewed as a awful thing. </p>

<p>At the end of the day, if students receiving financial aid are viewed negatively simply because of their FA vs FP status, it is clear to me that this analysis speaks volumes about the person doing the judging and absolutely nothing about the student. Remind your children that you can’t please all the people all the time.</p>

<p>Fundamentally, we can hope for an environment where our DC are afforded the dignity and respect deserving of all members of the BS community. At best, we can hope for opportunities for them to form strong, meaningful bonds across ALL lines. There is much value in the lesson learned that, in the final analysis, we all have more in common that the differences that divide us. However, encourage them to hold steadfast to their strong bonds with their dining buddies because the two friendship paradigms are not mutually exclusive.</p>

<p>Good luck with your searches everyone. Keep in mind our DC are not as fragile as we may think. Just trust your instincts and gut feelings of your kids during the school hunt and they’ll be fine.</p>

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<p>nylecoj007 - Your post is why CC needs a “like” button. Beautifully said and accurate based on my observations and experiences.</p>

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<p>great post. nylecoj007.</p>

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<p>We’re “comfortable” and send our daughter to BS. It’s been a good experience. The initial “adjustment” can often feel like it has to do with race - but it is mostly about finding your niche and posse of friends. </p>

<p>It is also (I CAN"T YELL THIS ENOUGH) about visiting campuses and finding the one that feels like a good fit. Different schools have different personalities and emphasis and what is good for one student might be hell for another.</p>

<p>Yes - it’s true there is sometimes an assumption that if you are black you are an ABC kid - but that doesn’t last long. Certainly it’s not as bad as it was in the '80’s with the labeling. These days - it’s about how you act and interact, not what your income level is. My daughter has friends on full scholarship, and friends whose families own empires. In the end, she found people with like personalities of diverse ethnicities.</p>

<p>I do find, sometimes, that students who “don’t” find a way to fit in, struggle because they can’t get their preconceived notions out of their heads once on campus. Or are trying to prove something. And, if we’re being blunt, I used to observe wealthy black kids wearing it on the outside and acting if students of their own race who were less wealthy were beneath them. OR who thought it important to adopt some pseudo-stereotype of what the media portrays as urban behavior in order to fit in. </p>

<p>If that’s not your kid, don’t worry about.</p>

<p>We’ve enjoyed are experience, but it’s mainly because our daughter chose a school whose students and faculty clearly liked her as well.</p>

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<p>Excellent post AtlantaBSMom. Conducting site visits is very important and asking the right questions.</p>

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<p>I have just begun the process of reviewing boarding schools. My husband and I do very well financially and we are seeking a boarding school that has a decent percentage of African American children enrolled but who are not all economically disadvantaged. I was told that there were several schools in Canada who would meet our profile; however, Canada is a bit far for us.</p>

<p>Any suggestions</p>

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<p>Try this US Dept of Ed website. It has exact numbers of how many of each race in the school:
<a href=“http://nces.ed.gov/surveys/pss/privateschoolsearch/[/url]”>http://nces.ed.gov/surveys/pss/privateschoolsearch/&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>After identifying the schools w reasonably sized AA populations, contact the school admissions offices individually to enquire about socioeconomic status.</p>

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This is a very old post and im sure by now you have decided what to do for your child’s education. However, this is a great question and deserves as many point of views as possible. I attended a New England Boarding School, not through any Programs but through administration at my JHS. My experience was very different from how you described your experience. I would attribute that to simply a change in times and possibly where you went to school. I felt very included in my boarding school in New Hampshire both from Faculty and Students alike. I cherish the years I spent in boarding school, looking back on it with fond memories.

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MODERATOR’S NOTE:

Perhaps, but the Original Poster is long gone, so will never see the post. Old threads should be used for research only, but should not be resurrected. Closing thread.