And so it begins...help from vets of the process please!

Parents Forum
1

So here is my story:

My S is a junior. We live near NYC. He is at a large competitive HS, taking all Honors and AP offered (his choice, not mine). His GPA is slightly. Below 94%, his school does not rank or do 4.0 GPA, nor do they “weight” them.

He has taken both act and sat.

ACT: 34
SAT: 2100

He is a very hard worker, but also very smart. On the other hand, I grew up a slacker and poor, so though I have a law degree and an advanced law degree, I know NOTHING about this process and am scurrying on the learning curve. I had one option when I went. No GCs to tell me about financial aid, even though my scores were stellar. I say all this bc I want you to know where I’m coming from, bc this tends to make me “overcompensate” with my kids.

He wants to study business, likely economics (applied) or math (Math SAT 690, SAT 35). He is also an excellent writer, but hates that.

His ECs are: (projecting senior year)

Cross Country 9, 10, 11, 12 varsity 3 years
Winter and Spring Track: all 4 years Varsity
Honor Society
4 years summer gifted programs (8th through 10th grades). Is this worth mentioning?
About 5 hours a month at the local food pantry where the program head raves about him.
Soccer referee 3 years
Summer camp counsellor this year
We did some “unique” fundraising his 8th and 9th grades, raising over 9k at events where he was the MC (is this worth mentioning)?

Leadership is a tough thing. To me it’s corporate BS, the colleges now forcing kids to pump up these “leadership things” but, if I had to say anything here, he has had to lead his own little brother who has autism, and I am a single mom. Not to mislead, dads in the picture, pays, and I have plenty of help. But it has been a big challenge for my S to deal with his bro. Esp with them in the same school and ECs now.

His personality, should mention he has Aspergers too, but has never had any educational, executive functioning issues to date. But social is harder for him bc he is very rigid and literal. He enjoys others, but does struggle to maintain the connections.

Financially, we CAN pay for anything. It is possible. Of course it will interfere with retirement. I am almost 50 now, but am willing. (This may be me “overcompensating” see above)! He likes the usual: Penn, Duke, Cornell, in that order. He is also looking at Lehigh, UNC, Miami of OH, Elon, U of M, Tulane, and of course SUNY Binghamton. Not in that order.

How do other parents look at this? These schools are massive $&, but some give $, some don’t for merit (there will be no FA). What should I be saying now to keep his mind open, to not expect to get into the top 3, to look at merits eu with Pride, and not as a consolation prize…

Also, I’m not up on undergrad business schools, which is stupid bc I work in IB, so I should be. So thoughts on the programs at these schools, or other options are welcome!!!

I just don’t want to put undue pressure on him, nor do I want to let my ow tendency to overcompensate for my experience to bankrupt me!! I do have send the other kid to school too!!

Any advice is welcome and appreciated!!

Thanks!

2

SUNY Binghamton is not as massive $$ as the rest! That is where my daughter, who majored in Math, went. Awesome value for OOS students (and probably in state too!)

The first thing I would figure out is how much you can pay per year. Keep in mind your retirement and also your second child. There is nothing wrong with saying “I can afford $XX,000 per year so keep that in mind as you apply”.
Then he would need to find lower cost options (SUNY Bing) or colleges that give merit scholarships. Don’t compromise your retirement…your son be just fine if he doesn’t go to Cornell. Keep in mind that often students start their list with schools they have heard of so it is good you are looking for other options.

Also try using the supermatch tool over on the left and put in your son’s stats…it will give you some ideas like Rochester Institute of Technology that you may not have thought of that would offer merit scholarships. Click on “I’m interested in schools where I would be well above average, to increase my financial aid opportunities”

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I’ll try the tool! Thanks. Yes Bing is a bargain instate! They also have a great IB specific program I wish I could take!

I forgot S has also had 7 years and counting piano.

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My son has somewhat similar stats and similar interest in economics. So I am going to watch your post for advice.

Run the NPC for Cornell and Penn and see what comes up financially. Also, Tulane’s NPC figures in scholarships.

Has he visited all of the schools? What about Brandeis?

I have told my son he needs to find some merit scholarships, and he seems happy to apply to schools where he will be in the top 25%. We can afford to pay a lot but $60k plus per year would be really tough, especially for two kids.

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About leadership: it’s a quality, not a title. Some hs activities do involve responsibilities, but you can also be the kid at the food pantry who takes it seriously, makes a difference on that team, without being called “leader.” You want to look at everything he does, find the patterns. It’s not just about what he does via the hs.

He may decide to write about his relationship with his brother, that advice can come later. But be aware some colleges are also interested in how he’ll get along with others. Not to worry, his sports, the vol and ref do show engagement.

There should still be space on the app for the summer programs. Take a look at a sample common app and some college supplements.

And see what you can pick up from this thread: http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/1771433-can-being-good-enough-be-good-enough.html#latest

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I’d suggest visiting as many match/low reach schools as possible, and sitting in on classes. In our case, my D became much more relaxed with the process once she got to know a variety of campuses. For an excellent smaller school, consider looking at Union.

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Make sure he has a safety (at least one) he is assured of getting in, you can afford, and he would be HAPPY to attend. With his grades and scores there are some good options available in the pinned threads in the Financial Aid forum (Alabama comes to mind). You might also consider some of the Catholic schools like U Dayton which has a good entrepreneurship program (you S would definitely get some merit aid there).

8

Educationally, it sounds like a lot of places are just fine. But finding the social fit is where the challenge lies. I would think about the pros/cons of a smaller vs larger university or consider a LAC.

9

Has he taken the SAT Subject Tests? Some of the schools on his list require them.

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Do they require them even if you use the SAT? (sorry I’m naive in how it works!)

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^^yes!
so tell us what AP classes he is/ has taken so we can guide you into what SAT subject tests to take.

you should also look at these threads started by parents of Aspies: there are a lot good , nurturing colleges where your son may be more comfortable ,given his social skills.
http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/1768857-introverted-child-p1.html

http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/college-search-selection/1768797-aspergers-and-college.html

http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/learning-differences-challenges-ld-adhd/1683859-colleges-with-a-good-autism-support-program.html#latest

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Ok thanks. Will start looking at naviance for that.

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Yes, SAT subject tests may be needed in addition to the SAT reasoning test. They test high school level material in the subject area. Apparently, many here do not trust the quality of their high school courses, so they claim that the AP course is “necessary” to prepare (but if the high school is that bad, the AP courses may be insufficient also).

14

Sounds like your son is in a good position to be making some of these application decisions himself. That is a very good thing for him to do. That is my best advice. Let your kid do some of this and make the decisions about what is and what is not worth mentioning. Let him schedule the interviews, choose the schools, complete the application (everyone needs someone to review their work for minor edits). I’m a parent and that is how I look at this. With my kids, what I know about each interview is the a ride is needed to get to it.

15

Do you live in NYS? You mention near NYC but that could be CT or NJ.

If NYS, three of the seven U/G colleges at Cornell will charge your son $16K less in tuition than they charge OOS residents. Agriculture & Life Sciences (where the Dyson Business program is housed, but 8% admit rate), Industrial & Labor Relations, which can easily become a business major, and PAM within Human Ecology, which is more public policy than business. Take a look at the course offerings and distribution requirements for each of those three schools, and you will see what I mean. I would avoid the direct admit to Dyson as the odds are so low, and the RD admit rate is even lower.

Tulane should/may offer $25K =/- in merit aid for that ACT score.

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Ok. Yes, we are NY, and that does help with Cornell. If he gets into a dream school, we’ll pay. After that, it is a balancing act.

Lostaccount, lol! I’m in no way a helicopter mom, I promise! I’ve just had my head in the sand til now and just have no clue how it works. And that is how I ended up with a subpar school myself, though I did just fine in the end…

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hi @HRSMom I don’t have any advice (YET!) but just wanted to say that you sound funny and insightful and on top of things, so i suspect you and your son are going to be in good shape.

Welome!

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AP classes this year are English, physics and US history.

Not sure you mean next ye too, but, Next year he is scheduled Econmics, physics and Spanish.

I have his transcript, I can never remember otherwise.

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Thanks Southernhope. I try to keep a sense of humor in life!

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If he wants to take subject tests, you have until May 8th to register w/o penalty. There is a chance that his own school will not have space, but you can just book a seat at another school, if available.

If AP Lit, then can consider Lit subject test. If AP Physics C, then take physics SAT II, but if B, do not attempt subject test. (I think B has been broken down to 1 & 2 this year. B is the one that is not calculus-based.) APUSH and USH Subject test are not as well aligned this year as in past years but I cannot remember which one changed.

Also may want to consider math II subject test, assuming he has completed pre-calc.

When registering, you can register and pay for only one test, and then he can decide between now & then if he plans to take two or three. CB will bill you via the mail for the additional fee for each test beyond the first.

It probably goes w/o saying that he should not take any of these tests w/o some prep. Studying for AP exams in same subjects usually covers most of the material, but it might be worth taking a look at the practice test questions on the CB website and then ordering the CB subject test books. (Amazon sells at better price than CB.)

Also, Cornell requires reporting all testing history so even though Ag, ILR & Hum Ec schools do not require subject tests, he will need to submit subject test scores if he takes the exams.