<p>i like to listen to "heaven is a place on earth" by belinda carlisle. whether on the road, in the gym or about to do calculus homework, it really gets me pumped.</p>
<p>LOL...let me find something....</p>
<p>I'm gonna fight 'em off
A seven nation army couldn't hold me back
They're gonna rip it off
Taking their time right behind my back
And I'm talking to myself at night
Because I can't forget
Back and forth through my mind
Behind a cigarette
And the message coming from my eyes
Says leave it alone</p>
<p>that was the White Stripes, best bad ever!!! whahoooo!</p>
<p>my take on this is ibftw isn't saying anything that isn't true for all schools. At my public high school, theres a lot of kids that hate it. There are a lot of people who only focus on their looks and how much money they have. Theres snobby kids at my school too. Cliques are everywhere. In my grade, theres the cool/popular kids, the normal kids, then the Goths and weirdos. Kids cheat a lot here too.</p>
<p>So, what is he saying that is so different? Oooh lets be scared and not go to boarding school cuz there are snobby, elitist, grade grubbing students? Whats so different about that? </p>
<p>The one thing I do think can be a detriment at boarding school is the small student body. If you dont fit in with your classmates, who do you hang out with? At least at a public school, you can move to a different group. Its a lot harder at boarding school</p>
<p>but is worth the 40k/year and insane amount of rules you have to obey?</p>
<h1>1 It does</h1>
<h1>2 Don't call me love.</h1>
<p>Revolution is about how you can’t fight violence with violence, you know the Vietnam war.</p>
<p>I don’t think you and the posters like you represent die hard anti-Vietnam radicals, especially since you’re not making “aggressive” posts. </p>
<p>Pleading in an online chat does not equal leading violent marches </p>
<p>But what would I know?</p>
<p>I'm walking away from this one.</p>
<p>
[quote]
but is worth the 40k/year and insane amount of rules you have to obey?
[/quote]
Only we can decide that for ourselves, right ibftw? I guess as long as we go to the school with open eyes, not looking for a utopia or a means to escape from our life at home, we will be okay. but hey, I do appreciate your take on boarding school. So, am I right about Taft :D</p>
<p>
[quote]
back it up with real facts and experiences? i went to boarding school for four years. you want stories? kids got kicked out all the time. for everything. drugs, grades, skipping classes, threatening other students. there were suicides and attempts. classmates of mine have flunked out of plenty of places. the majority did not get into harvard, yale or princeton (and let's be clear, there are way more recruited athletes, minority kids and million-dollar legacies at these places than any other high school in america). people i knew who hated it the most were the ones who had gone to normal high schools. hated it more than i did even.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>OK, these things do occur and I assume that you observed many of the above (I assume you didn't directly witness the suicide although I kinda doubt that there was more than one while you were there - that would have been all over the press). So what is your take on why this is worse than other alternatives (local private or public school)? </p>
<p>This is where we turn the thread into a valid discussion of issues...</p>
<p>BTW, for purposes of discussion, the boarding school where my D attends has students with many of the same issues you witnessed. Yup, I do mention problems from time to time, but do not dwell upon them. Fortunately, my D hasn't been a part of this negativism and wouldn't come back home to school if I paid her. Not that we live in a bad part of town. Quite well off in fact (although I don't necessarily qualify as well off - far from it). Just to give you an idea of what goes on with the local high schools (both public and private), one of the topics I started a long time ago in the parents forum was this one.
<a href="http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parent-cafe/244715-do-over-top-birthday-parties-bother-you.html?highlight=birthday%5B/url%5D">http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parent-cafe/244715-do-over-top-birthday-parties-bother-you.html?highlight=birthday</a>
The kid having one of those birthday parties went to the local public school</p>
<p>Yes, they have the same problems at public schools as private schools. I just frequently remind my daughter is that the difference between rich and poor people is that the rich ones can afford more exotic problems.</p>
<p>Myself, on the other hand, I went to a public school in an inner-city. Let's say it wasn't particularly safe as in the 3 years I attended (it was 10-12 school) 3 people, including an armed security guard, were killed on or within 100 feet of campus. I spent my life there trying not to be noticed, as that was one certain way of getting the attention of the wrong crowd. Gosh, I only wish I had heard of boarding school and my parents could find a way to get me in there. I'm beyond that experience now, just wanting to provide the life to my children that suits them best. BTW, goaliegirl asked to go away to school, as it fit her objectives for her development.</p>
<p>It just seems to me that with many if not most of the negative things you experienced in boarding school could very well have been experienced anywhere you went. I think your issue is more with the fact that you weren't there by choice and still seem to be dealing with some anger towards that situation. And when there is someone else to blame, it is very easy to dwell on the negative. And when you dwell upon the negative, you are attracted to others like yourself. That is why you saw so much of it where you were.</p>
<p>I like to tell a story I heard about a mayor of a small resort town who always took the time to greet all newcomers and answer any questions they had. One such newcomer asked "How do you find the people in this town?" They mayor asked him in return, "Well, how did you find the people in the town where you came from?" The newcomer answered "They were cold and uncaring. I'm so glad to be out of there." To which the mayor replied, "I think you will find people here pretty much the same." And sure enough within a year, that newcomer had moved on complaining about the place to everyone he could find.</p>
<p>Another newcomer bought the house from him and when greeted by the mayor, he to asked about how the people were in the town, having heard from the previous owner at closing. The mayor asked him the same question, "How did you find the people in the town where you came from?" To which the second newcomer replied, "Well, I'm really sad to say that I'm going to miss the warmth and charm of the people where I lived before." To which the mayor replied as he did to the first newcomer, "I think you will find people here pretty much the same." And surprisingly enough that second newcomer made many friends and enjoyed the rest of his life in that town.</p>
<p>Point here is that we often find the problems that we are familiar with and look for, but we too can find the good as well.</p>
<p>It is OK to be point out the negative experiences of boarding school. It happens and it can be quite upsetting. However, we should not cloud our minds with the baggage we carry from elsewhere. Look at the Leaving Choate thread. Clearly BS wasn't everything it was cracked up to be there. People make decisions and then deal with them without tearing down the whole institution. It wasn't right for her, as boarding school wasn't right for you. Fortunately for her, there wasn't too much damage done and she can see the value for others in boarding school. Perhaps if your vision wasn't clouded by your lack of choice in being there, you might take more analytical look at why you were miserable there. Was it the school or your not wanting to be there. From your writing, it seems to me that you haven't separated the 2 things.</p>
<p>I hope that the college you are attending, is of your choosing and not your parents. That would be adding insult to injury.</p>
<p>It was.....Mrs. Peacock/drawing room/rope! Did you by any chance attend St. Balls, er Paul's, lbftw?
And what was that comment a few pages back? All of the young men I know are closet gays? "Awk-ward"....I hear that all the time, didn't know that only certain types used it.</p>
<p>St. Balls? haha...I never heard that before :). He said a president went to his school, which made me think of Choate or Andover. But taft/shaft was all I could think of. I guess I'm not that familiar with genitalia nicknames... johnson? :D</p>
<p>"What do you expect when your name rhymes with a part of the female anatomy?"</p>
<p>YouTube</a> - Seinfeld Junior Mint episode-Dolores Scenes</p>
<p>Celeste...Kest...Hest...
Aretha
Bovary
Mulva
Gipple
Loweola
....
Oh! Oh! Delores!</p>
<p>Must be St. Paul's, clearly balls rhymes with Paul's and as to the point of the president, a president did go there, anybody ever hear of John Kerry. Oh wait... nope my bad, something happened in Florida.</p>
<p>This may be IBFTF making an indirect comment about the 2004 presidential election.</p>
<p>haha, this is becoming quite the board mystery. it's irrelevant though, for you see, i attended every boarding school in the country in spirit.</p>
<p>lbftw, </p>
<p>Bottom line here is I want to hear about your views of boarding school, you can be a valuable resource to this board.</p>
<p>Do not talk in hyperbole and assume the relationship you had with your parents is the same as the relationship I have with my child. You don't know me, my child or our relationship. </p>
<p>When you make statements such as "no child would ever choose to go to boarding school" and we disagree, please do not dismiss us. Perhaps our children really did come to us and ask to go, mine did. D'yer spoke of his child and how he enjoyed boarding school and you basically said you know more about his son that he. You are surprised in our reaction? Keep your opinions in the context of your experiences and don't project. If you keep this in mind, I (and perhaps others) will happily listen to what you have to say.</p>
<p>"If you want to insult and act like a jacka--, go somewhere else."
from jedwards</p>
<p>and</p>
<p>"but your smart-a-- remark about "thanks for playing" proves to me that, even at her young age, she already is more mature and responsible than you."
also from jedwards</p>
<p>haha i was just reading through this board and i got to the second page where basically so far: lbftw has given opinions on questions asked to him and jedwards had made very clear that these opinions are only his. jedwards has also said that she is a she and she doesn't want to argue with this "young" man implies that she is far more mature and therefore able to state her opinions in a more mature way. well read the two quotes above =) [i mean the message i was trying to point out]</p>
<p>just my thoughts...i noticed a lot of disagreement in the first two pages of this board so i thought i'd add to that haha =]</p>
<p>I have read most of the comments in this thread and since the beginning, I have paid attention to what lbftw has said and it has made a lot of sense to me and none of it has struck me as being overly negative. (I am a parent if that is not clear from my handle). My daughter in her first year of BS has noticed many of the things he has written about -- she reports of the 'in-group' as being legacy kids. She knows who has hooked up with whom, and so does everyone else apparently. She also loves school, has friends, is participating in lots of activities, and I think is keeping her nose very clean. In other words, being VERY MUCH the same kid she was before BS. So I guess what I will say is this: you take yourself to BS and other people take themselves and BS does not transform you and them into something different than they were back home. If you are a confident, well-adjusted go-getter kind of a kid, the various dramas of popularity, money, mischief, influence etc at BS (for they surely exist at BS as at any other school) will be obvious to you but should not be anything more than an interesting thing to talk about with your roommate. There is a place at BS for unconnected smart happy kids. They LOVE those kinds of kids! I have heard nothing but raves from all my kid's teachers and coaches so far and my kid is telling me she loves it and wants to go back, for sure.</p>
1 Like
<p>Hockeykid wrote:</p>
<p>Must be St. Paul's, clearly balls rhymes with Paul's and as to the point of the president, a president did go there, anybody ever hear of John Kerry. Oh wait... nope my bad, something happened in Florida.</p>
<p>This may be IBFTF making an indirect comment about the 2004 presidential election.</p>
<hr>
<p>Hockeykid! Florida was Bush versus Gore. 2000. Kerry...2004....well he was Swiftboated. Totally different arm of the Republican machine at work. :-)</p>
<p>For the curious, the following is GREAT reading, and a lovely dance through the constitutional minefield.....
BUSH</a> v. GORE</p>
<p>As another parent, I will echo momtoanundecided's comments. Like any high school, there are negative elements but the majority don't get sucked into those negative experiences. Momtoanundecided brought up a very important point - confidence! If your child is easily influenced and lacks self-esteem and self-confidence, I would think twice about sending them into a boarding situation. If they posses those traits, however, BS can be a wonderful, growing experience. Being away from the support network of a family, I think these traits are key to success in a place where you are surrounded by your peers 24/7.</p>
<p>Wow momofundecided, you are completely right. haha I am still laughing at the fact I said that. </p>
<p>The mind goes crazy late at night.</p>