<p>Thanks for the update. I bet better weather is making a big difference. 
You might think about meditation ( there are often groups or free classes) and continuing regular aerobic exercise.
My D who has had significant anxiety from birth( sensory disorder) has found them very helpful with managing anxiety levels. She now enjoys running so much that she is planning for a marathon!</p>
<p>Wow! It took a lot more strength by mom and dad to say no than to give in and let you come home. Good for you for sticking with it and good for them for believing in you. Powerful stuff! GL</p>
<p>Glad you made it through the year. I hope when you find a therapist to work with, and maybe you could find someone this summer, you look for someone who does CBT or DBT. These are very effective, results oriented therapies, designed to assist you in getting control of your feelings and the narrative in your head which causes these feelings.</p>
<p>Good luck to you. I doubt it will feel as daunting next year if you do go back, though it takes a lot of courage and grace to gut that out like that.</p>
<p>Marybee333 … Love the do something nice idea.</p>
<p>One small step at a time … also aerobic exercise and the happy light! My DD swears by the happy light. Now she lives in SoCal so it must be psychosomatic … But if it works, it works. </p>
<p>Dd went to boarding school in New Hampshire … We did not know it is known as the dark side of the mountain … high percentege of seasonal mood disorder… Something about the light. It hit her hard!</p>
<p>Also …
Music, meditation, try something new, break up the routine. Try a class at the athletic center … Yoga, kick boxing, fencing … Use you body in novel ways. </p>
<p>Meds are god sends. Do not have to be on forever.</p>
<p>I suffered from anxiety. There is no reason to suffer. Go see a good specialist. There are good medicines nowadays with low side effects that will help you get better. I used them for a year. Now (ten year later) I do not take anything and do not even remember that I ever suffered from anxiety and panic.</p>
Itisraining,
Your courage to persevere has given me hope. My son is due to board a plane to return for the second semester of his freshman year in two hours. He suffered terrible anxiety through first semester, but kept it all to himself. He’s been up all night stressing about going back, but he is going to go. We sat down together and located resources for counseling and an on-campus psychiatrist to continue the one month SSRI script his primary care physician wrote him last week. He decided two day ago to try it. We told him that he is free to come home after this semester. Please give an update on your progress. Thanks so much for sharing.
I encourage you to consider being more honest with your parents about the intensity of your anxiety. They may be thinking of this as “homesickness” type anxiety, with thoughts of “suck it up, get busy with social activities and you’ll forget that you miss home.” Maybe if they understood the depths and consistency of your anxiety, they would change how they are perceiving your options. They must love you dearly, but sometimes parents assume things are one way and can’t allow themselves to see the reality of a situation.
I encourage you to give the school counselor a chance. Let the school counselor get your records from your hometown therapist (you’ll have to sign a permission form to release records) so the school counselor understands the depth of your anxiety. Try to commit to at least 3 sessions with the school counselor before you decide it is not a good match.
If the school counselor really doesn’t work out, I encourage you to reconnect with your hometown therapist. Ask your parents if you can set up telephone appointment, skype, or come home for some in-person sessions. Even just a few sessions with a therapist who knows your history could help you determine how to proceed.
I agree that medications can be scary, side effects can be as bad as the original symptoms. But at least have the talk with the medical professionals. Ask the questions. Be as informed as you can be. Maybe a new medication has come on the market recently. Is there a lighter dose of meds you can take for a shorter period of time that can offer a bit of hope during the cold winter months? What are the alternative treatments? Sometimes there are more natural supplements (like St. Johns Wart) or light therapy that can offer a small improvement to your life.
Schedule some trips home this semester, so you can have something to look forward to. Lighten your academic load if you are able. Switch out the hardest class, or drop a class to have a more manageable workload. Continue your exercise routine, even if you don’t think you feel better, it is a good foundation for a more positive life. And try to connect with friends too.
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