My son is graduating and doesn’t have a “permanent” job. He’s going back to his summer job (teaching at iDtech summer camp) which he loves. His idea is to look for a job over the summer. He’s hoping to get hired by an independent game studio (major is CS with video game concentration) in the city where he attended college. His partner (an artist) will also be looking for work, or just working in the ‘gig economy’.
I am worried that it will be harder than he thinks. He has a small portfolio, but nothing earth-shattering. He has worked summers teaching, rather than doing internships, but has no teaching credentials. He also has ideas of marketing a game he’s created with a team in school, but I don’t know if that’s realistic. He has good CS skills, but he’s not a genius or a hard-core coder.
I’m worried that he’s in for a bit of a rude awakening, particularly when the student loan payments come due (just the standard sub/unsub federal loans, but still…). Only time will tell.
Many retail stores and restaurants will hire recent college grads as Management Trainees or Assistant Managers. Even though these jobs may not lead to high paying careers, they do provide experience in leadership, customer service, money management etc. They are usually staffed by younger people and the atmosphere can be a lot of fun. In addition, the requirement of working nights/weekends actually works well for people applying for other jobs as they have the flexibility of scheduling daytime interviews.
My niece is working as an Assistant Manager at a local Dunkin Donuts. Its fast paced and she loves it. Although the starting salary is not great, with overtime, she makes a decent wage. She has also made friends with fellow employees as well as regular customers so it meets many of her social needs as well.
While this goes back many years, when my brother got out of college the economy was really tough and he couldn’t land a job after almost two years of looking, so he went to Officer Training School and joined the military. Not saying it would be good for anyone else, but it was great for him.
For me, when I was in my mid-20s I worked in an area where there weren’t many other young people and I was extremely lonely. Through a lot of networking I finally found my entrance into a great social scene, a share in a summer house in a happening young people’s area, which then led to a share in a ski house for the winter. These weren’t that expensive because we stacked 4 people in a room, and after being so lonely, the more the merrier! I know this isn’t that helpful for OP’s son at the moment because he isn’t earning any money yet, but if he gets a job offer in a geographic area where there aren’t many social possibilities, this is a good thing to know about.
OP what about your S’s college’s career service office? Would it be helpful for him to go back and spend some time there? Once when I moved to a new area (followed my spouse), I went back to my grad school career services office, even though I graduated 10 years prior, and they were really helpful with providing me access to job postings and information on local alum for networking purposes. They also would have conducted mock interviews if I wanted.
Among the young people I know, and some are Harvard grads, this is a normal experience. Sure, some meet with recruiters in the fall of senior year, especially computer science majors and those going into consulting and finance etc., but the grand majority don’t have things lined up. (And I don’t necessarily think of undergrad major as a “field” or view job/career as always tied to major, though in some jobs it does help of course.)
Home can be a safe place to return to but it can also be regressive. Many seem to live with college friends in some city or other and land some kind of job- restaurant, retail, temporary, or entry level in a company they would be interested in working in- to pay the expenses. I help mine out a little, to the extent I can. LIving at home on a long term basis sure doesn’t work for everyone.
Easy to say but honestly I wouldn’t worry. None of us should buy into the linear path that kids (and parents) hear about for so many years. It zigs and zags for many. It’s okay to work at jobs that seem beneath a college grad for awhile too. One of mine worked for two years at a dry cleaners and now has a job in the psych. field. That experience helps her relate, believe me.
Five years out from my youngest’s peers graduating, and I would say the friends of all three of my kids, most of whom were like your son after college, have found their niches in terms of (good) jobs and for several, significant others as well.
I cannot tell you all how much I appreciate the responses and reassurances. Although I know on an intellectual level that there are many others in his situation, it somehow makes me feel better to hear actual stories, especially ones of those who have “been there, done that” and come out on the other side.
We live in an area that is not economically depressed; in fact, it is doing quite well - (we’re in the mid-Atlantic DC suburbs) - but along with that comes a very high cost of living. This is a great area to live in if you have a CS/tech/engineering degree especially. DS’s degree is in Environmental Studies, specifically interested in sustainability. I know just about zero on this subject, so I don’t even know what kinds of jobs are out there for an entry level position. He is willing to relocate, but would prefer to stay in this region.
He is more forthcoming with my husband than with me and they had some one-on-one time yesterday where he indicated that he had been somewhat depressed earlier this spring (he didn’t say that - what he said was that he couldn’t sleep or eat); this was a surprise to us, as he always put on a good face during our calls/chats. He claims that that has passed, but that may explain his poor grades last semester.
Also - agree with all that he needs to be physically active and also have something to do, even if not in his field. Both would help his state of mind and (hopefully) keep the feelings of depression away. That and the Caps winning the Stanley Cup
One of my nieces just got a job in that area. She graduated and worked in cafes for 18 months. But kept looking. I also think volunteering or interning can help, post grad.
Situational depression is one thing. If your son had a more clinical depression, then it may recur so it would be good to have a talk about resources if it does. Meds can do wonders, and therapy helps too (but of the two, for clinical depression, I would vote or meds)>
Even some volunteer work that interests him will get him engaged and meeting other people. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a full-time thing but with you in the DC area, perhaps there is something like that he can pursue that is environmentally/sustainability oriented. He can always combine it with a “pay the bills” job that might not be directly related to his interests.
Is there a particular area within the environmental/sustainability arena that interests him?
@compmom This is the lesson my eldest got from studying abroad. She ended up with a dorm room for two month longer than her schooling in London so she travelled and met so many young people who were just living and totally comfortable with that. They weren’t trust fund babies… they would work hard for 6 months and then travel for 3. They were part of programs that let them do odd jobs in different countries. It really opened her eyes to the idea that linear progression isn’t necessary and that it’s ok to be at educated 21-year-old working on a farm because you really want to experience Prague. It’s why DD took the job she did. It’s just something she’s always wanted to try.
There are a number of jobs for the National Park Service listed on USAJOBS. Some are in your area. Perhaps something like that would appeal to your son. They have both seasonal summer type jobs and permanent positions.
Another parent of a somewhat recent grad with some overlapping experience – hang in there, both of you! My kid loved his undergrad experience, and was not enthusiastic about contemplating the next step. He was looking for a job in politics, a field where the job often starts 2-4 weeks from the start of the search so could not really make much headway during the school year. His finance and engineering friends had jobs lined up by the fall of senior year, and there he was, living at home the summer after graduation . . . lots of tension and worry, plus the adjustments of having him back in the house full time, rather than just short vacations. After a few months, he was hired into a great position, loves his new city and his work, and has learned a lot.
Advice on job search (nothing new here): network – my kid followed up on every “you should talk to so and so,” and met a lot of interesting people. Those conversations helped him understand the kinds of jobs out there and which areas he was better suited to, helping him craft stronger applications. He also volunteered/interned during the summer in order to have something on his resume for that time and to actually have something to do. Also, the career services folks at his college should still be available, so he might consider setting up skype or even a live visit depending on travel.
Many students are in OP’s son’s case, yet most figure it out, often because there is no choice BUT to figure it out. OP, encourage your son to network and talk to all his friends, fellow students, friends’ parents, etc. Give him time - and space to fail – but also firm parameters. Do you expect to help him out after graduation? If so he needs to know in advance for how long. I told my kiddos that they wouldn’t be subsidized until their dream job turns up, that if the dream job remains elusive they need to get a regular job to pay their bills and keep looking. They both found things right after graduation - because they had to.
Four of my kids have graduated from college so far. All slow starters with uncertain futures. First kid was NMF with a liberal arts degree from a great books school. Had taken the GRE, but unsure about grad school. Came home with us after graduation. When he was still unemployed/ playing videogames July 1, I started charging him room/board. He applied to teach English in Korea. (He’d never had interest in teaching). Then he was by chance (through connections with former classmate) offered a private school teaching job he’d never applied for. He took it because it was in an interesting place, good for an adventure for a year or two. 8 years later he is still there, now vice principal, married, expecting a baby. Employer is paying for his master’s.
Kid 2 with Bio major/French minor, failed to get into dental school. Spent a year working as a dental assistant. Got turned off to the field. Quickly put together an art portfolio (had talent), got into an art school in Italy. Graduated last year. Teaches sculpture/anatomy there (though she studied painting.) Barely/not quite supporting herself.
Next kid was 2016 CS/honors grad, also NMF with full ride. Moved back home from OOS college. Took 9 (stressful) months to land a professional job. He is on the spectrum-- brilliant, but has some communication issues. He rents out our basement (separate apartment). Doing well at his job, increasing skills/confidence, but not sure what the future holds for him.
Kid #4, also NMF/full ride, just graduated/BS in business a few weeks ago. (He SAID he graduated–showed me an email that his degree was registered/diploma to be mailed.) He didn’t attend ceremony as he was driving back from a semester-long “dream” internship. He has some online creative (humor related) projects that he says he makes a little $ from. He says he has a huge number of followers, that he has gotten big offers for advertising (not accepting) and wants to keep writing/developing his ideas because he thinks he can make it pay off. He has a few other projects in the works. He asked to live in our attic for a year to work on these things. I will start charging nominal rent in Aug. I also want him to get out of the house with a small (10-15hrs/wk) part-time job. TBH, I am very skeptical about this kid’s plan and don’t understand exactly what he’s up to. (I know a lot of parents would not allow this.) I said, OK, as long as he’s paying rent/working and not doing anything illegal/ immoral. (Wouldn’t be like him–I trust him. ) He does have some hs friends in town who are all recent college grads–they hang out once or twice a week.
10 years ago, I couldn’t have predicted where these young adults would be at this point. I just figure that things will work out eventually. . .
“My niece is working as an Assistant Manager at a local Dunkin Donuts. Its fast paced and she loves it. Although the starting salary is not great, with overtime, she makes a decent wage. She has also made friends with fellow employees as well as regular customers so it meets many of her social needs as well.”
I can’t imagine how difficult it must be for parents who have shelled out 250K for college to accept an assistant manager at D&D as kids first job. (Not saying that was the case here). Reminder to full pay parents that this indeed could be your kids situation, therefore make sure you are comfortable with the potential initial ROI… Or choose a cheaper school.
@suzyQ7 thats a good point. I suspect my D with a humanities degree from a CC Top University will make less in her first job than I did 30 years ago with a STEM degree from a directional state school. She agrees. She also says that she will move up and studies show she will do well after a few years. Yes, studies do show that. We knew this before shelling out the $ (luckily less than 250k.) She has a second interview for a good career focused summer job this week. Fingers crossed.
I didn’t read through this thread thoroughly but I also just graduated. I am not sure how to assess the uncertainty of my position - my plan is to write my MCAT, so similar to the OP’s son, apply to MD/PhD programs, and work in research for my gap year. My long term plans - attend an MD/PhD program, try to do a startup etc. are obviously much more variable and this stresses me out substantially, because if I don’t get in, it’ll be very painful for me. I have a few offers for research positions, but I feel too stressed to decide.
I am a disappointment to my parents, as many of my friends have already gotten into medical school, while my own chances are less with a 3.74 as a Canadian, or they have prestigious jobs in finance. Like the OP’s son, my grades also fell my last semester because I was just burnt out and regularly had a bunch of senior crises where I though I should switch into finance etc. Many of my friends from elite LACs are going home and will then be applying to jobs while working in service or other industries temporarily. I don’t think your son is on an atypical route. I think networking is a really great suggestion - emailing alums (find them on linkedin, see who came by to speak at the college), joining the alumni club etc. can help your son get his foot through the door, or just some advice. It’s a bit weird and artificial, but you have to be a bit brazen and just go for it. My college’s career center was also really helpful in fine tuning resumes/cover letters…mine offers remote services - maybe his does as well.
Working toward any kind of goal can provide structure and motivation. Maybe he can schedule a few hours for the GRE in the morning, and then block out some time for networking/applying and then block out gym time. I know some companies offer internships even to undergraduates, and he can also volunteer. I’m sure he (and everyone else) will work things out, even if it takes a bit longer than anyone likes.
For clarification - my post about my niece’s job at DD was intended as a suggestion for an interim job that would provide some income and experience for OP’s son as well as a social outlet.
My niece is actually working while attending college and living at home. She is paying off her car, paying for summer classes, etc.
Maybe we all need to take a page from the musical theatre bfa parents book. We know tons of them and while they of course worry about their kids like we all do and would like them immediately set up with health insurance and a 401k, they expect their kid to grab a job as a barista after college so they can start auditioning. No shame in that. A career can take time and more than a diploma to develop. It’s a healthy attitude perhaps.
@HMom16 Yes, National Park Service has some interesting projects right now and is where my own D landed. Mine will be researching and re-writing the literature of the park she’s at along with designing new tours and education packages. She will also be giving tours and hiking trails and general ranger stuff. The NPS is trying to own up to and incorporate some of their more negative history into their public persona. It’s work that speaks to my journalist daughter. They pay very little but some offer free housing in really beautiful places. Like I said, I was confused at first but I get it now and there’s are worse places to decompress and figure out your next step than a National Park.
My neighbor is a professional photographer. He got his start taking pictures at rock concerts back in the 70s. He’s got pics of all today’s “classic” rockers – Dylan, Zeplin, Heart, McCartney, etc. It’s really cool. He eventually had to get a real job and went corporate – annual reports and such.
