Anyone willing to grade an essay?

Test Preparation SAT Preparation
1

<p>Hey guys,</p>

<p>I would appreciate it if you could grade my essay and give me some pointers. I'm an international student. However, please grade it as you would any other essay; I'd like to get a more realistic/accurate evaluation.</p>

<p>Thank you!</p>

<p>Assignment: Do incidents from the past continue to influence the present?</p>

<p>--> One of the most renowned psychologists through history, Alfred Binet once said: “we are the creation of time”; everything we are today was influenced by our past. Literature through the ages has featured characters and storylines that demonstrate this aspect of life. In F. Scott Fitzgerald’s classic American novel, The Great Gatsby, we are invited to watch the protagonist, Jay Gatsby, ruin his life by chasing his past. Similarly, in the timeless coming of age classic, The Scarlet Letter, by Nathaniel Hawthorne, we also see the main character, Hester Prynne, subject to the influence of a past sin.
--> In F. Scott Fitzgerald’s novel, set in the roaring 20’s, we are introduced to Nick Carraway, a neighbor of the novel’s namesake, Gatsby. Nick guides us through a period of Jay Gatsby’s life that has Gatsby living in a mansion on the north shore of Long Island for one reason and one reason only: he wants to reunite with his long lost love of his youth, Daisy Buchannan. Daisy is now married to another man, a man Nick knew at Yale. She also happens to be Nick’s cousin, which is the primary reason why Gatsby goes out of his way to make friends with Nick. Through a series of elaborate parties, Gatsby hopes to win back Daisy, the only woman he ever loves, by finding her at one of the parties and hoping sparks fly as they did when the two courted years back. Gatsby’s entire existence is based on winning back his past love. Where he lives, the money he makes, and how he dresses and acts are all direct products of his desire to recreate his earlier years with Daisy. Thus, F. Scott Fitzgerald our past defines our lives in myriad ways.
--> Just as Gatsby’s life is guided by his past, so too is Hester Prynne’s, in Nathaniel Hawthrone’s novel, The Scarlet Letter. In this timeless classic, we meet Hester Prynne, a young woman who endures years of shame and scorn as a results of her history. Hester married an elderly scholar, Chillingworth, who send her ahead to America to live. But because he is captured by Native Americans, he arrives belatedly. While waiting for him, Hester had an affair with a puritian minister name Dimmesdale, after which she gave birth to Pearl. For her sin, Hester is forced to wear a scarlet letter “A”, which is meant to be a symbol of shame, resembling “adulterer”. Hester is ostracized by the people of Boston for her past actions. Although her sin results in expulsion and suffering, it also results in knowledge -- for her, the scarlet functions as “her passport” to speculate about her society and herself more boldly than anyone else in New England. Thus, we are products of our past and history, and our lives build on that past.
--> As I have discussed, I strongly feel that our lives in the present, which is the future of the past, are by-products of antecedent incidents. As in The Great Gatsby, wherein Jay Gatsby’s life course is based on winning back the affection of a long lost lover, and The Scarlet Letter, where a past sin results in the protagonist, Hester Prynne, altering her way of thinking and her societal status, we see that our bygone actions affect us in important and salient ways.</p>

2

<p>–> One of the most renowned psychologists through history, Alfred Binet once said: “we are the creation of time”; everything we are today was influenced by our past. Literature through the ages has featured characters and storylines that demonstrate this aspect of life. In F. Scott Fitzgerald’s classic American novel, The Great Gatsby, we are invited to watch the protagonist, Jay Gatsby, ruin his life by chasing his past. Similarly, in the timeless coming of age classic, The Scarlet Letter, by Nathaniel Hawthorne, we also see the main character, Hester Prynne, subject to the influence of a past sin.
→ In F. Scott Fitzgerald’s novel, set in the roaring 20’s, we are introduced to Nick Carraway, a neighbor of the novel’s namesake, Gatsby. Nick guides us through a period of Jay Gatsby’s life that has Gatsby living in a mansion on the north shore of Long Island for one reason and one reason only: he wants to reunite with his long lost love of his youth, Daisy Buchannan. Daisy is now married to another man, a man Nick knew at Yale. She also happens to be Nick’s cousin, which is the primary reason why Gatsby goes out of his way to make friends with Nick. Through a series of elaborate parties, Gatsby hopes to win back Daisy, the only woman he ever loves, by finding her at one of the parties and hoping sparks fly as they did when the two courted years back. Gatsby’s entire existence is based on winning back his past love. Where he lives, the money he makes, and how he dresses and acts are all direct products of his desire to recreate his earlier years with Daisy. Thus, F. Scott Fitzgerald our past defines our lives in myriad ways.
–>Just as Gatsby’s life is guided by his past, so too is Hester Prynne’s, in Nathaniel Hawthrone’s novel, The Scarlet Letter. In this timeless classic, we meet Hester Prynne, a young woman who endures years of shame and scorn as a results of her history. Hester married an elderly scholar, Chillingworth, who send her ahead to America to live. But<a href=“However?”>color=“red”</a>[/color] because he is captured by Native Americans, he arrives belatedly. While waiting for him, Hester had an affair with a puritian minister name Dimmesdale, after which she gave birth to Pearl. For her sin, Hester is forced to wear a scarlet letter “A”, which is meant to be a symbol of shame, resembling “adulterer”. Hester is ostracized by the people of Boston for her past actions. Although her sin results in expulsion and suffering, it also results in knowledge – for her, the scarlet functions as “her passport” to speculate about her society and herself more boldly than anyone else in New England. Thus, we are products of our past and history, and our lives build on that past.
→ As I have discussed, I strongly feel that our lives in the present, which is the future of the past, are by-products of antecedent incidents. As in The Great Gatsby, wherein Jay Gatsby’s life course is based on winning back the affection of a long lost lover, and The Scarlet Letter, where a past sin results in the protagonist, Hester Prynne, altering her way of thinking and her societal status, we see that our bygone actions affect us in important and salient ways.</p>

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<p>I highlighted a few of the errors in red, not that they would make this any less than a 6, but to help you see some of the minor things you can easily fix. Some of them aren’t even completely wrong, but have better alternatives, which I’m sure you’ll be able to see. Be careful with your tenses.</p>

<p>Great examples
great layout
good sentence structure</p>

<p>Overall 6/6</p>

3

<p>Perfect, thank you!</p>

<p>I have one question about the tenses: I always find myself confused when it comes to describing events that already happened in the story. For example, in The Scarlet Letter, we learn that Hester Prynne had an affair in the past and was already married (as opposed to chronological events that occur in the story itself.) Should I also use present tense here?</p>

4

<p>Here’s a fixed version of it, based on what you’ve told me. I haven’t read this novel, so I’m taking your word for it.</p>

<p>–>Just as Gatsby’s life is guided by his past, so too is Hester Prynne’s. In Nathaniel Hawthrone’s novel, The Scarlet Letter, we meet Hester Prynne, a young woman who endured years of shame and scorn as a result of her past. Hester married an elderly scholar, Chillingworth, who sent her to America to live. However, because he is captured by Native Americans he arrives belatedly. While waiting for him, Hester had an affair with a Puritian minister named Dimmesdale, after which she gave birth to Pearl. </p>

<ul>
<li>“endured”</li>
<li> “as a result of her past”</li>
<li>Puritan should be caps(I believe)</li>
<li>“Puritan minister NAMED Dimmesdale”</li>
</ul>

<p>If the events you’re talking about occurred prior to the events of the book, then you write about it in the past tense.(how we’re doing it here) If it happens in the events of the book itself, you write in the present tense.</p>