<p>I have a senior boy (this may be part of the problem) who has worked very hard for the past four years and earned great grades, great scores, good ECA's. He has wonderful prospects. We have been trying to get him to fill out his college applications since AUGUST and he's done a page here, a little there, and now, with a week to go, he has completed maybe half of the 10 applications he was planning to send out. When we're not watching him, he's on the Internet (Facebook, Youtube, cartoons). He will burn hours away on the Internet. Now we are in crisis mode, and his only Early Action application was deferred. The past couple of weeks have been HELL. I don't know what's going on. Anything similar out there? Is this a boy thing?</p>
<p>He's avoiding the applications because he can't face his fears. Try to break everything up into small bites and get him to do something every day or two. He's going to have a dismal Christmas break.</p>
<p>Has he gotten the letters of recommendation that he needs, and the list of schools to his HS guidance counselor? Has he sent his SAT/ACT scores? These have to be done ASAP.</p>
<p>He'll probably do some amount of work and have to live with the consequences. If his prospects aren't appealing because of the way he handled his applications, he should consider doing a gap year and reapplying in the fall.</p>
<p>My son just finished his first semester of college and I'm still not sure he's finished his applications. (Sorry, lame joke.)</p>
<p>Yeah, I was there last year. If you want him to finish his list you will have to micromanage every step. Or. Decide that his future is his problem, not yours, and let the cards fall where they will. The worst case I can think of is that you continue to stress out, but don't just go ahead and helicopter over the problem. Then, you'll both go nuts and the applications still won't go out.</p>
<p>Good luck. I don't get to have this problem again for another two years.</p>
<p>Nope, not a boy thing.</p>
<p>Procrastination was why I insisted Mathson apply early action last year. Then fortuitously his safety school sent him a simplified application that promised a decision within 3 weeks. So that was a no brainer too. That ensured that he had several essays that could be used on the rest of his applications. He still handed in the rest of them at the last minute. GRRR. We had a deal where I scheduled nagging to about once a week.</p>
<p>Boy thing, eh? My daughter took the prize in application procrastination!!! She is now procrastinating on her transfer application to a school she very much wants to attend (due to change in career direction). Yes, she has until March 1. However, she is spending many hours of her Christmas break relaxing ... with plenty of time to do the essay (her sticking point on last year's apps). The good news from my point of view is that I no longer care! She is at a fine school where she is happy ... so if she procrastinates & doesn't get the app done for the transfer school, she will be just fine. I told her this one is her problem. I will proof if she wants, but I won't provide the "reminder" service I gave her last year.</p>
<p>I feel for those of you in the middle of senior year procrastination season. If you are like me, you want to make sure you don't have a kid living in your basement at 40!! Just kidding.</p>
<p>Have his apps to safeties been sent out (I hope he has safeties)? These are the most important. I was a total wreck this time last year and my high achieving boy had sent out 3 or 4 of the 10 he was intending. I gave up on nagging after he'd gotten out about 5, but he finished all 10 before the deadline. He also spent hours on computer games etc. while I was tearing out my hair. He had left the reachiest schools until last and I knew he could be very happy with the ones he'd applied to already, so I realized he didn't really have to apply to 10 and told him so. His were all CA schools and for most he could recycle the supplement essay/ short answers with minor changes, so it wasn't a huge amount of work. Good luck!</p>
<p>My S's went out 12/31 or 1/1, depending on school. I think my hair turned gray during the last weeks of December.</p>
<p>Been there, done that. Christmas break last year was brutal, lots of nagging from both parental units. Applications got in, but at the last second. I am happy that we are not doing that same dance this year.</p>
<p>Been there- it's not pleasant. One way to avoid a school your parent wants you to apply to is to miss the deadline... and west coast apps have to be in by midnight their time, right? And apply to the flagship safety in mid Jan after parental nagging- at least it only took 3 weeks for the rolling admissions decision (high stats). Happy and successful in college, you will survive your son's senior year (ask me in ten years, when anonymity isn't an issue). BTW, learned that the Honors Program gets most of its apps the due date week, procrastination is common among the best students.</p>
<p>Same???? I think you are lucky!!! He has ALREADY filled half of his 10 applications. I have a daughter who also works hard, has great grades and test scores and is a pretty strong candidate to very selective schools. But she has not finished even her first aplication yet (out of 14 or 15 total of which 11 or 12 are due Jan 1). The only difference - I cannot complain about her wasting time, she was too busy with oter stuff, which seemed no less important. I guess she simply underestimated the amount of work involved in the application process. I wrote about her procrastination couple weeks ago on the college admission forum (check in my topics if you have time). Got some advice plus a list of safeties, which was helpful (except that it made her list of schools even longer).
I hope for a miracle that "something started here and something already filled there" will become complete applications by New Year's eve. Right now I am not even pushing - panic is not a good aid. My advice now - relax and observe, answer questions and help only when asked. I know that she applied to one safety, a state school that doesn't need an essay unless you aim for Honors College. Online application took 10 minutes; applying to Honors College will take another hour after she finishes her common app essay). I am not sure whether she is really ready to go there (one important condition for the safety school), but it is better than community college and safe financially. Can you get such a back-up? I also know that she has drafts of essays. Probably rough drafts so far, but she writes well when it comes to school homework. Essays may need months of polishing for the Ivies but couple rounds of revisions should result in good/very good essays, enough for match-safeties.
So now I plan not to interfere till next Friday, Dec. 28. Hopefully by then she will have as many apps as your son has now. If not, I'll make sure that she sends the common app to four or five shools by Dec 29 (couple reaches, three high matches). This will leave enough time for finishing four or five supplements by Jan 1. Finally, we made sure that there are at least two schools on her list (and at least one match among them) that have deadlines later in January. This way she will apply to 6-7 schools, which is OK</p>
<p>Oh boy, I can relate to this. Since S was applying for film production, he had to have all his apps in early, which I now see was a blessing. It was still a big melt-down panic event, but at least it's over.</p>
<p>Now I have more to worry about. He bombed pretty badly on his first semester grades (1 A, 1 B, 2 C's...and AP English Lit isn't in yet- it's an online class). So, I'm thinking he needs some "safer safeties" but we will cross that bridge after Christmas. He isn't going to be happy about applying for those schools, but I'm going to insist.</p>
<p>And speaking of procrastination....the B class and one of the C classes he's been telling me all semester he had A's in. Apparently he didn't realize that he would not get credit for work turned in late, and there was a lot of work turned in late. Aaaargh!</p>
<p>I don't know= college applications seem pretty important to me....kids are booked up yes, but they need to learn when to say- no can't do that meeting, be on that committee...</p>
<p>CITYMOM, Your posting concerns me a lot:</p>
<p>
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I also know that she has drafts of essays. Probably rough drafts so far, but she writes well when it comes to school homework.
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</p>
<p>It sounds as though you haven't any idea what is on the drafts of essays, if they answer the prompt, or if they even exist. You don't even know except she's told you she has "probably rough drafts."</p>
<p>Me? I'd ask to see every page she allegedly harbors today (Friday morning), or if you miss her at breakfast, insist she come home immediately after school. If there's nothing, cancel all the weekend plans. Consider cutting Christmas to the bare bones.</p>
<p>If she can leave you all her essays, then after she goes off to school, just read each against the question to make sure she's responding specifically to the question.</p>
<p>
[quote]
Essays may need months of polishing for the Ivies but couple rounds of revisions should result in good/very good essays, enough for match-safeties.
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</p>
<p>I don't know. I think she'd be competing with some kids for whom her safeties are their match. Even if another's essay is imperfect, it might be immediately clear to the AdComs that someone else cared much more than your D. Last-minute and slapdash are pretty easy to spot.</p>
<p>
[quote]
So now I plan not to interfere till next Friday, Dec. 28.
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</p>
<p>What happens if you or she get a mild flu, there's a power failure, somebody else in your family needs emergency attention..?</p>
<p>If Christmas activity looms large in your household this weekend, she really won't get into this much until around Wednesday morning Dec. 26. What can she generate in just 48 hours in time for your first check-in on Dec 28?</p>
<p>Listen, my kids are of the last-minute-before deadline to push "send" and they work best under pressure. Still, I was way more aware of what they had and didn't have by this date. And they each only had 7 or 8 apps, not the double digits you've suggested.</p>
<p>Respectfully, I think you're giving her too much rope to hang herself. THIS weekend, starting around 3 p.m. Friday, I'd go into emergency mode and spread out all the materials, take stock, figure out what needs to be done.</p>
<p>The essays from each college differ just enough that each needs some attention. Have you spread out all the apps to see which short answers will overlap; which need unique attention? I fear you might be assuming all the short answers are alike. They're almost alike, but different enough that you can't just cut-and-paste. For example, one school might ask for a few sentences on leadership but another doesn't; therefore you have to mention her leadership somewhere in a larger essay. </p>
<p>Or, two schools ask about "most inspiring experience or person" but one wants it in 250 words, another 300 words, another 400 characters. That's NOT the same essay 3 times. She needs time to edit so each conforms to the word limits. That's 2 hours here and there, not a minute here and there, in our house anyway.</p>
<p>I think you should get very involved starting tomorrow, oh I mean actually Friday.</p>
<p>No, it's definitely not a boy thing.</p>
<p>I've completed three apps so far and procrastinated on all three! The most recent one I submitted 20 minutes before the deadline (scholarship deadline, not actual). Amazingly, the guy from the admissions office (at PLU) called three days later to tell me I'm accepted and thanked me for writing an essay that actually stood out.</p>
<p>I'm a natural procrastinator, but I also have a knack for always getting things done. I guess that's why I never feel rushed. Maybe other teenagers feel this same way? I don't panic because even though I leave things to the last minute, they always somehow end up getting done. I procrastinate because I can, basically. Also, I've found that I do my best work under pressure. Don't worry; I know this will have to stop when I get to college because I definitely don't want to be writing multiple-page papers the night before they're due.</p>
<p>Also, I was surprised so many of your sons/daughters are applying to 10+ schools! I'm only applying to 6, and I feel that's a lot!</p>
<p>Be careful about sending stuff online at the very last minute. Servers might crash. Might be a good idea to give yourself a cushion of 1-2 days.</p>
<p>Timely, senioritis can really be rough ... sometimes, I think it's almost rougher on the parents than it is on the kids, though!! :)</p>
<p>My D turned in several apps at 11:57 pm or so on the due date. So glad that's behind us!! For what it's worth, she got in everywhere she wanted to get in.</p>
<p>FWIW, my son is also relaxed under pressure and performs very well at the last minute. I was worried about eleventh hour viruses or crashes, human or cyber, but they didn't happen. However, before Jan 1, he was accepted to 2 excellent safeties with merit $$ and had applied to 2 other matches and 2 reachier matches, one with a strong legaciy tie and another where a coach was interested in him. I felt that this group of schools probably contained his best fits anyway, so that helped me relax. That's why I'm asking OP about safeties. This you should worry about unless everyone is comfortable with a gap year.</p>
<p>paying3tuitions
Thanks the "Wake-up call". I think my post sounded more "let it go" thanI really feel.
You see, what my daughter has now is a big step forward from what she had couple weeks ago, when she got really scared. We had a major "What needs to be done and what are the exact deadlines" talk last weekend. From then she had an ASAP list for things to request from school and a list of essays and short answers to be written.</p>
<p>The ASAP list is done. All colleges are chosen, teachers' recs, transcripts and scores (except for Dec subject test) are sent.
As the next step, she chose to concentrate on personal essays. I agreed. She is writing three that cover common app and "What else.." on some supplements. She can manage with two essays for most apps if one doesn't work out at all. She has couple more possible topics on her list if she decides to switch. I think personal essays are the ones that matter most in terms of quality and style. Correct?
Short answers and "why this major" and "why this school" essays seem to be easier for the last-minute push, when daughter will be more nervous and exausted. (I now see that we also need to check word limits for all these, thank you!). They will take hours, but not days .... hopefully. </p>
<p>Now, while I am (desperately-trying- to-be-) relaxed, she is in a pressure-cooker mode already. School is over today, and I KNOW that she will be workingo her apps as soon as she comes back. And I suspect that this is probably true for 90% of overloaded high-achieving kids late on their top-school apps (apps to other schools are much simpler) I will offer to see the drafts tomorrow morning (your alarm works!). But what I am trying to prevent is putting a child into the "I am late-late-late, no way to do it perfect , I need to rush-rush-rush whatever I have" mode too early. I think that working hard but staying cool is a better bet right now . And this is my main message.
I guess at some point we will need another discussion with y daughter: "What needs to be done to finish 2-3 relly strong apps (so far I think that an app CAN be finished in a day after all the essays are already written). What else can be rushed with whatever she has for her 2-3 top apps (couple more schools, I guess). And, most importantly, what should be dropped".
What Ifs? They happen. So far we agreed that a generic deadline is FEDEX closing time Dec 31. I checked (without telling DD) that except for Yale Jan 1 postmark s OK (ruined New Year ... grrrr!) This will cover minor computer glitches. Major storms and power outages will cancel deadline. And for family emergencies .... well there are two schools with Ja 15 deadline. And a state school of she plas instead of working now (but I KNOW, SHE woun't)</p>
<p>I can relate to "senioritis"- ten year rule, I hear you, timely...</p>