Are you involved in your child's college?

Parents Forum
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<p>Not meaning to threadjack, but this was always something that annoyed me at the elem school level. The mothers were exhorted to come in and reshelve the books so that the school librarian could … what? Not have to stay past 3 pm? Not ever grab a quick lunch and spend her lunch time reshelving? Not ever come in on a weekend and finish a task? It just got me, that in the big professional world, people routinely work beyond typical 9 - 5 hours, come in on weekends and catch up on something, etc. but oh no, we wouldn’t ever want a public school librarian or employee at the elementary level to think her professionalism and dedication should extend past the 9 - 3 school hours. The 3 o’clock bell rang and she was out of there. Come on. Be like the rest of the big-girl world, stay late and get your job done instead of outsourcing it. Can you imagine going to your doctor’s office and being asked to reshelve your files because the receptionist / office staff viewed their jobs as 9 - 5? You’d say “too bad, figure it out, not my problem.” I think the elementary school system in this country has for too long relied on the largesse of mommy volunteers instead of demanding a better work ethic on the part of some of the employees.</p>

<p>/rant, sorry</p>

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<p>Pizza girl is on to it.</p>

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<p>Could we please NOT turn this into a “teacher bashing” thread? There are enough of those already.</p>

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<p>Why would you suddenly become invested in something you previously had no interest in?</p>

<p>The only answer seems to be because this is my adult childs interest now and I want to, in some way, feel connected to them.</p>

<p>Is it more than this?</p>

<p>Am I missing something?</p>

<p>I think adult children would be happy to see you reach out in new directions which coincide with your own separate interests. They would be happy to see you expand your life in ways that no longer include them. Young adults want to see their parents grow and become less reliant on their children for their activities and self worth.</p>

<p>How’s that for getting back on track?:)</p>

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<p>Pizzagirl…I don’t agree with you. I say this as a former parent volunteer in my kids’ elementary school and also as a former elementary school teacher. </p>

<p>From the perspective of a parent, I saw volunteering in school as benefitting many people. I personally benefitted from being aware of what was going on in school. My own children benefitted from our support and interest in their schools and involvement there. The other children benefitted by having more adults in the classroom (or library, etc.) allowing for more individualized attention…with schoolwork, reading, small group discussions, writing conferences, etc. It was a win-win all the way around. </p>

<p>As a teacher, I loved having parent volunteers, but not because it saved me any time. No, I stayed after school until 6 PM most days and also worked on my job on the weekends. But the parent volunteers allowed me to offer certain things in my classroom, such as one to one reading and writing conferences, running small groups, etc. It helped the kids. It did not make me have to work any less. </p>

<p>I did not volunteer in the library but am so glad that other parents did so (I volunteered in the classroom and enjoyed that and was a former teacher and so think I could help that way…and oh yeah, I just remembered, I ran an after school theater program to stage musicals for the lower elem grades as a volunteer…though after the success of that program, the school hired staff to offer musicals for the lower grades…had only been for upper elem grades before that). But in the library, I have seen the volunteers first hand because over the years I have been a substitute and have subbed for the librarian many times. As the librarian (and I was ONLY the sub), the day was very full with teaching “library” classes which each class had scheduled once/week, and many other tasks. While I did some shelving and such, it was very time consuming and by having parent volunteers, it freed up the professional librarian to do all the other important tasks. Otherwise, shelving books could have taken over as full time work, and the librarian at our school does far more than that. </p>

<p>I think volunteers have a place in education and everyone benefits. I do not think that volunteer work is INSTEAD of teachers doing their job, but rather enhances what can be offered to the children…more adults helping out, better ratio of adult/student, many time consuming tasks that are hard for staff to fit in with the more professional work that a teacher/librarian does. Of course, schools could just spend more money and hire more staff but most schools have been cutting staff and expenses and so I am grateful for volunteers who pick up the slack of what needs to be done to have very effective schools. </p>

<p>Also, as a former teacher, my job was so encompassing in terms of hours I put into it, that I discontinued the job when I had kids as the job was all day until dinner and much work taken home. The job is not 9-3 whatsoever.</p>

<p>As a mom, I am glad I volunteered so much when my kids were in school and my husband volunteered on the school board too. I feel our local schools and children in our community have benefitted greatly due to the high level of parent involvement in our school system.</p>

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<p>I agree with sax that when the kids leave the nest for college, a parent who is used to volunteering, should find other outlets for that locally and not at their kids’ colleges as the kids need to be more independent of parental involvement. Honestly, the local K-12 system could still benefit from your helping out if you enjoy that sort of thing, as well as a myriad of other organizations in the community.</p>

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<p>soozievt and thumper - I am NOT teacher bashing at all, and I certainly volunteered as a room parent, party coordinator, and the like when my kids were in elementary school. My rant was very specific and targeted at reshelving books and the concept that someone employed as an elementary school librarian, who did not have the “teacher planning responsibilities” that teachers do, couldn’t freakin’ stay one hour past the school bell, or come in an hour early, to finish her job but had to enlist an army of volunteers. So no rants directed at you ladies or at teachers in general!</p>

<p>But the concept that if all of our lower level duties were outsourced, we could all be more productive, applies to everyone – but only the education world seems to rely on the army of volunteers to do those things. My pediatrician’s receptionist could likely be more productive if someone else did the reshelving of files, but they don’t seem to rely on asking the mothers of the children they see to reshelve the files. Yet that’s acceptable at the elementary education world. It perpetuates inefficiency, IMO.</p>

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<p>At our elementary school, the librarian actual teaches “library” class to every class in the school. She has many other professional tasks to do as well. Checking books in and out and shelving them is something the librarian also does but could use extra hands to do that as it is time consuming and there are not many “extra” hours to do that with all the other responsibilities. As far as the professional world, someone may have a secretary or assistant do the less professionally oriented tasks. Parent volunteers in the library are doing assistant type tasks that are non-professional in nature. Some schools, if they had the budget, might hire an assistant to do these time consuming “secretarial” tasks, but others luckily have parent volunteers, so that the librarian can focus on the more professional tasks. </p>

<p>I do not agree with the analogy to the pediatrician’s receptionist. She IS the assistant…she is there to do the non-professional tasks so that the doctor is not answering the phone and shelving files. The librarian is also a professional with many professional tasks and could use an assistant to do the secretarial type tasks of checking books in and shelving them. Many schools employ such assistants (paraprofessionals) and some rely on parent volunteers to do such non-professional tasks, allowing the professional to focus on the many professional tasks at hand.</p>

<p>The reason the educational system relies on an army of volunteers is because they do not have the funds to hire assistants to do this type of work. In the business world, assistants, receptionists, and the like are paid employees.</p>

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<p>I am not a teacher, but I have a friend who is a kindergarten/1st grade teacher, and she used to be a banker. She quite her banking job because she didn’t feel fulfilled with her job. She loves her job now, but she works very long hours. I didn’t realize it, but according to her, she works most evenings in getting ready lessons ready for next day. She said it takes a lot to keep those kids interested and occupied. At many of those public schools, due to funding, many electives have been cut, so that meant those home room teachers have less time during the day because they need to teach more classes. At our kids’ private school, teachers often have few periods (while kids are at gym, art, music) to grade papers, but not so much at public schools. </p>

<p>When D1 was at a public school in 6th grade, her homeroom teacher had to leave them in the room by themselves whenever she had some administrative things to take care of. She didn’t get her papers or tests back until much later due to teacher’s workload.</p>

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<p>oldfort, when I taught primary grades, I stayed after school every day until 6 PM. School started at 7:40 AM. I also worked six hours every Sunday on work for my job.</p>

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<p>Our librarians didn’t have the teaching responsibilities you mentioned, soozievt. </p>

<p>My business partner and I certainly have people who do the administrative work – but we’re not “above” running the copy machine for production or packing boxes for our workshops, and if that involves staying late – then we just freakin’ do it, because what’s important is that it needs to be done. My H is a physician – but he’s not “above” replacing the toilet paper rolls or emptying the trashcans in the office if it needs to be done. I still think the reliance on helpful mommy volunteers promotes an aura of believing that certain things are “just administrative” which is inconsistent with a professional work ethic, IMO, but we can certainly agree to disagree on this one.</p>

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<p>I would much rather see our media specialist (that’s what the “librarians” at the school ARE now) spend their time teaching the children, helping to guide multimedia research (and YES…this begins in grade K at our school), researching and ordering excellent literature and non-fiction materials for the school media center, working on intergrating research with classroom curriculum, and the like. These folks are professionals in this area. It would be a shame for their valuable time to be used for shelving books which is not a very difficult job but IS a great way to get parents INTO the school media center.</p>

<p>And maybe in your school PG, the media person doesn’t have these jobs and leaves early and comes in late…but at my schools (both where I work and where I live) this is NOT the case.</p>

<p>Now…back to the thread.</p>

<p>I wouldn’t volunteer to shelve books in a college library. These places have stacks anyway and it’s a bit more complicated than just sticking a book on a shelf.</p>

<p>College was for my kids to become involved…not me. If either school was hosting an event in this area and WANTED parents of alums, I would offer…but really, they want the ALUMS…not their parents (unless the parents were noted in the development office as potential donors).</p>

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<p>thumper – I was about to post the same description of a media specialist’s job. You said it well.</p>

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<p>Pizzagirl,
Well, at our school, the librarian ALSO checks in books and shelves them and so she does do these administrative tasks. The volunteers simply help with the time consuming load. They do not replace the librarian doing these tasks. As a teacher, I also did administrative tasks at the copier and paper cutter. If a parent were to volunteer to make some copies for me, it would assist me but not keep me from still having to do that stuff some of the time too. In other words, the school librarian and teachers are NOT “above” such menial tasks, but simply have others who help out from time to time with these as they have NO paid assistants. Your husband and you have paid assistants, but still do some administrative tasks. The school teacher or librarian have no paid assistants and so take on all the administrative tasks along with their professional tasks, and so if someone volunteers a few hours per week to lighten the administrative tasks, I don’t see how that is different than professionals like you and your husband who have paid assistants to lighten your load of menial tasks.</p>

<p>PS, at our elem school the librarian’s job involves a lot of professional work and her main job is not shelving books even though she has to do that as well. When I have subbed for her, I could barely fit in shelving books into the day given all the other tasks and I was merely the sub.</p>

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<p>@PizzaGirl - However you feel about volunteering with the alum club or the admissions office is your business, but the OP, KingJulian, was specifically asking for ways he could volunteer with his kid’s college and one way is to get involved in the admissions events. I know several parents of alums from my school who do this or did this when their students were current students. As a student I participated in some of these events with the parents of other students. The parents of the admitted students liked the parent to parent contact. The parents of the enrolled students or alums liked the connection and the chance to share their experiences. So whether you think it’s intrusive or not doesn’t really seem to bear much on the reality that it happens to the mutual benefit of both parties. </p>

<p>Sure, you could wait for the alum club or admissions office to reach out through the students, but there’s no harm in getting in touch and simply saying I’m available, I’d like to help, feel free to call on me if something comes up. There are never enough volunteers and those willing to give their time were appreciated. </p>

<p>After all, many of the people on CC who comment on the school specific boards here are parents. People like to be involved in organizations whose mission they believe in, whether that’s a charity or an NGO, or in somce cases, a college. No one is saying that YOU have to do it, but I don’t see why we have to visit so much judgement upon others that want to do it. Why do you care so passionately whether or not other people give their time and why do you feel the need to censure them so severely?</p>

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<p>I also am not sure what the issue is with parent volunteers. There are many stay at home parents or parents who work part time and are choosing to support the local school and students by lending a helping hand that doesn’t replace the work that the staff does but can offer something extra that benefits the students. By having a parent shelve books for example, the librarian can work with students on their research projects and locate appropriate resources. By having a parent in the classroom to run a small group, it allows a teach to run another small group. By having a parent in the classroom, more kids get one on one reading and writing assistance, than one single adult can provide. Examples abound. Parents want to help. All benefit from it. K-12 is a partnership between teachers and parents and the entire community. That is one thing I loved about our elem school in particular.</p>

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<p>Another example of parent volunteering is parents in the guidance office. Look at all the kids on CC who are seeking advice and guidance on college selection and applications. There is no way a guidance counselor assigned to hundreds of kids can help a great deal on an individual basis and the students benefit from parents who opt to volunteer to assist kids in that area. Again, it is not lightening the load so much for the professional staff as assisting and helping students so that the students benefit from more adults and better ratios of help.</p>

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<p>Smithie - I wasn’t censuring them. Look, my D is going to a school very much like yours. The W club of Chicago is undoubtedly filled with lots of lovely women of all ages who have ties to the W community, and I certainly look forward to meeting them at any events they host. However, my D is the linkage to the school – not me. If they reached out and said, “We’d like to know if you, as the parent of a new W student, would like to do x, y and z,” sure, that’s great. But it would be weird (IMO) for me, as a forty-something year old who didn’t go to W, to try to crash the party of the W community. I don’t have the inside info about the school that only alumnae have. Nor will I ever – because my <em>D</em> will be the one spending 4 years there. Not me.</p>

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<p>soozievt and Smithie- my real objection is that keeping the status quo of “there will always be well-meaning parents to volunteer” means that there is no incentive for the right funding ever to be allocated. I mean, if an extra library assistant really is needed, why <em>should</em> the school fund it if they can always find a mom to reshelve? If an extra guidance counselor really is needed, why <em>should</em> the school fund it if they can always find some nice person to help out? It de-professionalizes things and removes the incentive to have things funded as they should be.</p>

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<p>I think the schools can’t afford to fund lots of assistants in the classroom and in the library. I don’t think the reason they don’t fund it is because “we have parents willing to do it for free.” I think they cannot increase the budgets and have them passed. As it is, they have to tighten and cut all the time. Adding new expenses that are very expensive just is not happening right now in public schooling.</p>

<p>Funding aside, however, I still think kids and parents benefit from parental involvement in the school system.</p>