<p>I feel like I lose a lot. The reason why is because I always have super-high and idealistic expectations. Life never goes the way I imagine and always the great things in life are unexpected (because I have little or no expectations for it). I'm often not #1, at school, at sports, etc.</p>
<p>I think the reason why I feel like this is because I'm a perfectionist that isn't perfect. I can't be labeled as an overachiever because I usually not #1. </p>
<p>Are any of you guys perfectionists? </p>
<p>Are you the person that loses a lot? (ex: waitlisted, #3, short of states, etc)</p>
<p>How do you deal with not being #1 and perfect?</p>
<p>It shouldn’t suprise you to not be #1 most of the time. It’s simple math: If there are 30 people in your group then you will be the best only 1 out of 30 times.</p>
<p>My advice is don’t think about being perfect. Just do what you like and be most passionate about it. (This is going to be corny) But your going to be #1 at anything you find yourself most happy and passionate about. Don’t strive for #1 because it will eat you up inside and you will burn yourself and become really depressed. Don’t feel like a loser. You can’t really lose at life, just make the most of it. Think about the good stuff about yourself, don’t focus about the negatives.</p>
<p>@OP I feel exactly the same way. Even though I try not to think about it, I always set goals too high and end up failing and never reaching them making me feel like a failure. I just don’t get how to live with yourself</p>
<p>I feel like that most of the time. And it’s less to do w/ perfectionist tendencies (I kinda given up on that long ago), but I still end up getting my hopes shattered. I’m not exaggerating even, people are always telling how much they feel sorry for me, how anything that could wrong ends up going wrong, and how my luck sucks. But I hate the idea of wallowing in self-pity though, I still believe that everything happens for a reason.</p>
<p>I agree with what sanguinity says. Being number one is simply something that happens to be an unexpected reward from hard work if it ever happens. Expecting such a limited position only sets up for disappointment. As long as I do well by my own consideration I’m satisfied.</p>
<p>I am 3 in my class and I am happy with that spot. I do, however, feel that I constantly lose, especially in terms of college admissions (I am sick of being waitlisted then outright ignored!). I am perfectionist to an extent, especially in terms of essays and some homework. I hope for things that never happen and it sucks most of the time.</p>
<p>When I saw the title of this thread I thought for a moment you meant “are you the person who loses everything a lot” - in that case, yes, definitely. I’m so disorganized I lose everything all the time.</p>
<p>I wouldn’t say I lose a lot, but I’ve had some weird losing streaks where whatever I put myself to doesn’t work out. It does from disappointing to frustrating to kind of fascinating as I wonder when and how my losing streak is going to end.</p>