When I was younger (I’m currently a sophomore in high school) I used to want to graduate early from high school. All throughout freshman year I worked hard to take on a very rigorous course schedule in order to squeeze all the classes required to graduate into three years. My course load looks like this:
9th Grade:
- Precalculus PreAP
- Chemistry PreAP
- Biology PreAP
- Band
- English 1 PreAP
- Spanish 2 PreAP
- World History AP
10th grade:
- Calculus BC
- AP Chemistry
- AP Biology
- AP Physics 1
- English 2 PreAP
- Spanish 3 PreAP
- Independent Study Math
I have exhausted my school’s curriculum and don’t have that many classes to take. However, through the first semester of sophomore year at high school, I realized that I didn’t feel like I was socially ready to graduate early (I’m already quite young for a sophomore). When I told my parents about this however, they asked what my course load would be for the next two years. Although my junior year would also be rigorous, my senior year would not carry the same rigor as my other three years in high school. Because of this, I face immense pressure at home every night from my parents as they keep pushing me to graduate early.
My parents are what I guess I could call “emotionally-detached”. I don’t speak to them about any of my social problems and school and over time they have just become guardians who take care of me and not true parents (people who I feel l can discuss anything about). This emotional detachment may have stemmed from the past one and a half years of just being locked up in my room working on homework all the time and never seeing them. Nevertheless, when I present them with this issue, they get extremely mad that I’m in their eyes “becoming lazy and mediocre” and that somehow this desire to stay an extra year in high school is only because of my friends.
I have tried to explain how I don’t feel like I’m socially ready to go to college and face the social challenges there. In addition, I’m having a lot of fun in high school and this time of my childhood is something that I will never get back. I don’t want to grow up too fast. But my parents just don’t understand that - all they see is an easy senior year and think I’m going to become somehow stupid in one year.
Any advice on how to get out of this perplex situation would be appreciated. Thank you so much.
Look into your heart and try to find the truth, what’s the real reason. It is possible that they aren’t totally wrong, may be subconsciously leaving friends is one of the reasons behind your anxiety.
You can finish early and then take a gap year. Their is no reason to hang out at your school for another year if you can do better things unless enjoying senior year is important to you. If you do stay, try to reconnect with your parents and make amends before you leave. Sometimes parents back off as they feel hurt by their teen’s behavior. You don’t want to become an stranger to your own parents, not fair to them and not mentally healthy for you.
In some ways, it’s better to have an easy load in senior year so you can focus on college applications. You can enroll in local community college for some dual credit and get an associate degree on the side. You can do online courses. You can do some research or take early release to add some work experience to your resume.
Arrange a session with school’s guidance counselor or an outside counselor where three of you present your take on this topic and hear GC’s analysis and advice.
If you do end up graduating early, it’s not a bad thing. You’ll have access to more advance and interesting courses and you may like college’s freedom better. Just explore your options before making up your mind. You’ll be fine either way and it wouldn’t matter in bigger picture of life.
You should try and figure out what you want to do. I think a gap year is a great idea. Speak to your guidance counsellor to get some views on what your options would be (working, research, charity, travel, etc.)
If you don’t feel ready for college at 17, that’s fine.
Please schedule a meeting with you, your parents, and your counselor. Yes, parents meet their kids’ counselors too. Email or talk to your counselor beforehand, and explain what you have said here. You can then all discuss together your junior and senior plans. Senior year is a good time to explore some fun electives you are interested in. Maybe you can do dual enrollment classes at a local CC. Gap years are also good, but it sounds like your parents are pushing for you to go right to college.
If your parents think graduating early is some kind of advantage, they are wrong. Colleges are not impressed by younger students. If anything, they might be scrutinized more closely. If you are not socially ready, I am 100% behind you. The first year of college is a big adjustment, and most kids have some kind of struggle. Some handle it better than others, but for you I think it might be a recipe for disaster.
Your parents love you, even if you don’t think so. Sometimes parents are so caught up in doing what they think is best for their child, that they forget to ask the child what he or she thinks. It sounds to me that they are proud of you for being so advanced and want you to keep pushing yourself. Don’t think they don’t love you, it isn’t true. They would probably be quite upset to know how you view them.
Does your HS have dual enrollment options with a local CC or college?
If you exhaust your high school’s offerings early, could you take courses at a nearby college while in your senior year of high school?
Regarding community college as an option, make sure it is dual enrollment or something similar. If you graduate early and then take any courses at CC you may not be considered a freshman at some universities, which would affect your eligibility for merit aid.
My son skipped a year (8th grade). Rather than going to college early he took an extra year as a rotary club ambassador abroad . This way he was able to acquire a new language and still graduate with his peers.
Seconding the Rotary ambassador idea as well as exploring dual enrollment (also called running start, Or pseo) .
Note that for selective college you need
Foreign language through level 3 or 4 or ap
Math through pre-calculus or calculus
Biology, chemistry, physics + 1 (including one AP preferably)
4 years of history/social science (honors/ap)
4 years of English (honors/ap)
1 year of art/music (required for CA universities)
Some personal picks reflecting your academic interests.
One semester of a community college dual enrollment class = 1 high school year.
So, if you take 2 dual enrollment English classes and 2 dual enrollment social science /history classes it counts as two 'years’or 'units’of each subject.
It looks like you’re missing a bunch of them.