My 12 year old daughter has expressed some interest in potentially exploring boarding schools for high school.
She is a quiet, studious child who is hoping for a serious, academically rigorous environment.
However, we are not a wealthy North Eastern family. We live in a southern state and are decidedly middle class.
I am honestly curious if any boarding schools would be welcoming to a student of her background, and if so, which ones?
Thank you so much!
Of course there are boarding schools that would welcome your daughter!
Adding geographic diversity is a plus. It is hard to say much more without more info from you. You have time to research schools – read old threads here, read Niche, read the schools’ newspapers etc etc etc.
If you live in North Carolina, then NCSSM is an option. It is a public boarding school with no tuition. The courses are rigorous and it is a small school. You have to apply in 10th grade. From what I’ve heard, it is a very close community. I hope this helps!
Welcome to the board!
Yes, absolutely boarding schools want middle class kids! Pretty much every school has a minority but significant percentage of middle class kids. It varies, but my sense is that the schools see them as an important part of balancing out the demographics. Having only rich kids and full ride kids isn’t ideal. The way my kid describes it at his school, 20% are conspicuously rich, 20% want to be in their orbit, and everyone else is normal and very friendly. But truth is, often you can’t tell who is wealthy- lots of really down to earth people have money. There’s not a lot to spend money once on the boarding school campus. The main ways it shows is vacations and clothes and getting food delivered to campus. But not all wealthy families value those things.
Conventional wisdom is that boarding schools are more generous with financial aid than colleges. So the sweet spot is finding a school that fits a kid’s learning and living style, that can give you enough aid to make it do-able.
There is the question of getting admitted - these schools can be very competitive. There is a really great thread here right now on one dad’s learning curve on finding a school with aid. Start there for your research. Don’t limit yourself to the most prestigious or well known. Lots of really great schools out there. Let us know what questions you have.
I think your question is a fair one. Most schools are quite excited about enrolling middle class kids, but for some of them, it can be hard to be among kids with significantly more wealth and who often have other ties to each other pre-BS. Generally not to the point that they have a miserable experience but they can feel a bit on the fringe. And some kids won’t register this at all.
Schools that offer FA to at least half their students may be ones less dominated by this. Westtown, George, and Mercersburg are 3 that fit the bill by that measure.
It also helps if a student has other ways of being part of the community, such as sports or theater. The “fringe” feeling can disappear quite quickly if you’re part of something else.
I’d find schools that look like a good fit in terms of interests, etc then do a little more in depth digging on the overall vibe. This concern should not discourage you from finding a good BS opportunity for your D.
I’m the completely inexperienced dad.
Some of what I am looking for is probably not of interest to you, because it it tailored to my daughter in particular, but most of the info in this thread would apply to you I think. There is a ton of helpful info in this thread. Also middle class, also 1500 miles away from most target schools. She has a couple of other very important considerations, but among her considerations is wanting to study in a place where she is surrounded by like minded kids who care about their classes.
Good luck.
@AmblesideMom We are in the exact same boat as you-- from the South, no ties to BS on either side of family, not at all wealthy, but right there in the middle economically.
Our take is that some BS’s have more of the NE wealth and some have less – some are more diverse geographically than others, even though the stats would put them at being similar. My DS was very quiet and studious–and ended up in a school perfect for him. He fits in well and has friends who are on complete opposite sides of the spectrum from financial, ethnic and religious aspects. His group is very diverse. I truly think it depends on the “fit” we all talk about more than anything else.
If you’d like to PM me, I would be happy to talk about our personal experiences, although it seems the crew has pretty much summed up the answer to your question. Welcome to the BS forum!
Thank you everyone for your input!
Groton has a program specifically to target middle class kids. They have recognized that they don’t want full pay and full ride kids only and created a financial aid arm to help families who fall in the middle. Good luck!