<p>I’m shamelessly bumping this thread. I really want four things to happen.</p>
<p>First, tell your kids what to do if a friend has too much to drink. Look at the link to the wallet card posted above in post #111 for the bare minimum of what they should know. It would be even better if they knew how to do CPR. </p>
<p>Second, for those of you whose kids are touring and choosing colleges, bring up questions about amnesty and the Red Watch Band program, especially in group information programs. Reality is that–admittedly for lots of good reasons–parents ask questions about what colleges are doing to prevent binge drinking. Colleges don’t want to seem “soft” on underage drinking. Let colleges know parents WANT amnesty–that not having amnesty programs might color your family’s decision when choosing a college. </p>
<p>Third, tell your kids that you will “be there” for them if they get into trouble for calling 911when a friend gets drunk, especially if they attend a school without an amnesty program. This is ESPECIALLY important for those of you who have religious scruples against drinking because at least some of your kids will drink and they might hesitate to call 911 because they are afraid of what will happen if you find out that they have. It’s also a good thing for parents of those OVER 21 to emphasize. It is not uncommon for those over 21 to buy alcohol for their underage friends. In most cases, this is a crime. So, those over 21 who bought the booze for the party are often the ones who won’t call 911. Tell your kids you don’t want them to do this, but if they are in a situation in which they might be held liable, e.g., a frat officer or the lessee of an off-campus apartment in which underage drinking takes place, you WANT them to call 911. You will think you’ve failed as a parent if they risk a life to avoid getting in trouble. </p>
<p>Finally, jump up and down and let your kids know that it’s just plain STUPID to indulge in drinking games. A lot of the deaths from alcohol are the result of the deceased’s participation in such games.</p>
<p>Reality bites. Young Adults some time drink in college (most). We as parents do have to help our children with the realities of college, drinking and life. Not by pouring alcohol down them at 16 yo and is anybody really saying that here are they? </p>
<p>At a nearby college last year, a young man drank himself to death in a frat house. At first, the newspaper reported the parents blamed the Frat house and the young men who lived there. Then the truth started to leak out. The young man had only lived in the Frat for 1 week. He had not been drinking with the “brothers” but out on his own. He had been kick out of his freshman dorm after only a month or two because of his drinking. He had brushes with the law when he was younger with his drinking in high school. His father tried to blame the Frat house first and then the University. But the father’s story had no traction because the boy’s drinking had been so well documented early on with warnings and removal. I believe this parent knew his son had a drinking problem and sent him to college and then wanted to blame anyone else for the tragic outcome. But we don’t do our children any favors if we blame others for their behavior.</p>
<p>I just checked with DS, a college junior. He said his LAC has amnesty for the person who calls Public Safety/911, and for the drinker - but the drinker only gets amnesty the first time. As for everyone else at the party, he said usually if someone is in bad enough shape to call Public Safety it’s about time for the party to end anyway. If the partygoers are heading out of the room/building while Public Safety is on their way in, they’re not going to track them down. They’re more concerned about the person who the call was for.</p>
<p>Just got this reply from my kids’ USoCal about their amnesty for reporting impaired peers:</p>
<p>Dear HImom,
We encourage students to seek help and to help others. We introduced a program called Trojans Care for Trojans (TC4T), [USC</a> Trojans Care for Trojans](<a href=“http://sait.usc.edu/ca/tc4t/]USC”>http://sait.usc.edu/ca/tc4t/), you can also email them at <a href=“mailto:tc4t@usc.edu”>tc4t@usc.edu</a> so students can report anonymously if they are concerned about a friend or acquaintance with drug and alcohol problems or if they suspect that there is any kind of problem that seems to be affecting the student’s life. If an individual student has a problem with drugs or alcohol or any problems that need addressing, there are no repercussions for seeking counseling, calling 911, or reaching out for help in any way. In fact, it takes a great deal of courage to do that and the counseling center and other student affairs professionals work confidentially with these students, and all students who seek help. I do not know if the university is considering the Red Watchband program but I can look into that and get back to you when I have more information.</p>
<p>These are extremely important issues and the university is constantly seeking ways to ensure our students have a healthy, productive and enjoyable college experience.</p>
<p>Regards,</p>
<p>Office of the Vice President for Student Affairs</p>