<p>my boyfriend is going to be at bu next year, and we're planning to stay together, so i was wondering how plausible it would be for us to see each other etc. with the crazy workload. i was also hoping to have him sleep over sometimes, and i was wondering if that's at all possible with a roommate or if i'll have to work as hard as i can for a single. i dont mean sleep over in an obnoxious loud drunk sex way (trust me, ive been there...summer camp roomies are fun), but just like being there overnight. also, does anyone know any particular dorms that are more conducive to that sort of thing?</p>
<p>If you have a roommate, you just need to talk to her and figure out what works for both of you. Better yet, make sure when you're picking a roommate during Orientation that you two are going to be able to agree on something. But hey, congrats to you two - at least you'll both be around Boston! Beats the multiple states of distance some of us would've had. :)</p>
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so i was wondering how plausible it would be for us to see each other etc. with the crazy workload
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<p>i go to caltech (pasadena, california), my girlfriend goes to MIT. if your relationship doesn't work out, it's not gonna be cause of the distance :-D</p>
<p>that's not true, ben. different dynamics for different relationships for different people. I know personally I would never be able to maintain a long-distance relationship.</p>
<p>Yeah, I never understood that practicality of long distance relationships. But as they say, different strokes for different folks.</p>
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i go to caltech (pasadena, california), my girlfriend goes to MIT.
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Yes well, you're a giant. I found it very tough when my old boyfriend left for college last year and I was still in high school... didn't end up working for us. It takes a really committed couple. But the point is, somethingnew and her bf will be in the same city, and they'll be fine. :)</p>
<p>I have friends who have girlfriends at Simmons, Northeastern, and Harvard, and they're doing just fine. I mean, lord, we're busy, but we have lives for godssakes.</p>
<p>Most roommates are pretty cool about sleepovers as long as it doesn't happen every night and there's not, as you said, obnoxious loud drunk sex. :) Of course, if you get a single you don't have to ask anybody's permission.</p>
<p>pebbles -- my statement technically holds. it won't be the distance per se that's the reason, but [relationship dynamics + distance], which is philosophically different in that trivial word-mincing kind of way. </p>
<p>kcastelle -- current success attributable to my previous failures. haven't ever met anyone who made it work the first time they tried, though i'm sure such people exist.</p>
<p>tchaikovsky -- habituation, too, has negative effects. there are pluses and minuses.</p>
<p>OH AND
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I know personally I would never be able to maintain a long-distance relationship.
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<p>i used to say this a lot. with an indisputable kind of conviction in my voice. ya never know ;-)</p>
<p>I wouldn't want to.</p>
<p>Self-knowledge is elusive. Is knowing whether you could fundamentally different from knowing whether you'd want to?</p>
<p>......Ben, you just blew my mind. But in all seriousness, somethingnew, I'm sure if you end up with a double, your roommate will be reasonable enough to work out some kind of agreement about your boyfriend spending the night and whatnot. Since you guys will both be in Boston, I'm sure the distance won't put too much stress. But you never know, so good luck!</p>
<p>thanks everyone! i was worried about ld relationships until my bf decided to go to bu, which was definitely good luck...i'm worried more about actually having time to spend with him than distance now. i'm glad doubles dont totally rule out sleepovers, but i was wondering whether a lot of people have their significant others sleep over? and also, how often do you think sleeping over might be appropriate? would once a week fly, or even twice? just asking because bu's guest policy is awful, you can have overnight guests like 5 times/semester and there's a lot of paperwork involved...</p>
<p>twice a week? you don't have enough time for that, get back to your psets</p>
<p>its 7:00 in the morning **** I'm such a mess</p>
<p>Ah, the infamous BU guest policy...</p>
<p>As for how often he could sleep over, that'll probably be left almost entirely to your roommate's comfort level and some experimenting on your part as to how good your time management skills are. For example, pset due dates will probably affect sleepover dates. And for the record, every couple I know of here has sleepovers. Some people are just...dumber about it than others.</p>
<p>heh, wow....do people really get that little sleep? i need 6 hrs at the very least to be awake in the morning...could i get 5/6 hrs a night at all?</p>
<p>im glad i wont be the only one. do you think that people would be cool with him hanging out with whatever friends i have at mit? he's a nice kid, nerdy videogame playing type...</p>
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he's a nice kid, nerdy videogame playing type
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Nope, sorry, don't think MIT has any of those. ;)</p>
<p>chances are your friends will be fine with your bf.</p>
<p>MIT is very cool (in the not interfering way) about staying over, etc. her frosh year, my gf had a double, and she and her roommate were able to work it out just fine when i visited -- i.e. it wasn't a problem.</p>
<p>i should say though, that it's much easier if you have a single. you don't have to worry about stepping on any toes that way. and you have more freedom in deciding whether to be loud and drunken or quiet and sleepy. (i always choose the latter ;-)</p>
<p>search for old posts by Mollie and pebbles. they outline in detail where you should live and whom you should kill to get a single. (or if those people are inclined, they should link to their old posts on those topics.)</p>
<p>It will really depend on what you work out with your boyfriend. A friend of mine basically lives with her boyfriend up at Harvard, so she gets to see him seven days a week. And when she needs to come back to pset, he comes with her. </p>
<p>Another friend of mine is dating a girl from Northeastern, and they see each other mostly on the weekends (although she was over here the other night).</p>
<p>So it depends on your schedule and what works best for both of you.</p>
<p>(For the record, I get ~7 hours of sleep a night. But I am old, and I live with my boy -- he has the single next door. When I was a freshman, there were often many more fun things to do than sleep. :))</p>
<p>I can tell you whom you should kill...</p>
<p>no promises on the single</p>
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my boyfriend is going to be at bu next year, and we're planning to stay together, so i was wondering how plausible it would be for us to see each other etc. with the crazy workload. i was also hoping to have him sleep over sometimes, and i was wondering if that's at all possible with a roommate or if i'll have to work as hard as i can for a single. i dont mean sleep over in an obnoxious loud drunk sex way (trust me, ive been there...summer camp roomies are fun), but just like being there overnight.
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<p>OH my GOD. Did I write this?! Haha, I had been wondering if there was anyone else like me... =]. See.. I ALSO have a nice, nerdy, videogame playing boyfriend going to BU!!!! (What're the chances, eh?) And I'm also trying for a single... heheh. :)</p>