OP – we need a lot more details in order to determine if you are whack or not.
What’s the $$$ delta between Miami and Wash U? How much is in the 529?
Where’s the amount beyond the 529 coming from? Home equity loan? Parent plus loans? Borrow against retirement plan? Pay out of current income?
Your original set up is pretty ambiguous. Eating Mac and cheese to pay the tuition is one thing. Taking out a second mortgage to pay the tuition is different thing.
FWIW, I just made my kid take the deal at a top 20 school and reject another dreamier top 20 school at full price. The delta was $200k.
Had the choice been a deal at a top 50 vs. a full price top 20, I probably would have paid up. For me paying up would be eating mac and cheese but not having to borrow money.
If some poster comes to CC and voluntarily give the forum enough detail to reach a conclusion that their family will “bankrupt” themselves, then that’s one thing. But making A LOT of assumptions about a poster’s financial situation and telling them certain catastrophe awaits them, just seems wrong to me.
Personally, this is the internet, so I wouldn’t give you kind folks “squatola” in terms of info. I’m surprised some folks do.
As I said, the OP says it’s handled, so let’s take his/her word for it.
@Darthdad Congrats to both of your children. Unlike many here I take your post as a slight amount of venting rather than asking for advice. Congrats on successful children and the ability to give them what they want and hopefully an environment where they will thrive and be successful.
Wash U is a TOP school and I know many who were denied and would have been thrilled to just have the chance.
So excited you can afford it and that you are not resentful or frustrated. My husband and I have worked forever with our first priority to launch our children successfully. Not there yet but hopefully getting close.
Congrats again.
@bhs1978 I took the OP’s thread title and post as a combination of slight tongue-in-cheek and slight vent. It doesn’t sound like there will be debt, but it does sound like the student is pursuing a degree in art, and maybe the OP doesn’t think it will provide the best ROI, though he is happy to provide the best opportunity/fit his daughter feels is right for her. If he can offer this opportunity/experience for his kids, well, thats… priceless. Hang in there, @bhs1978 - yours will soon be launched. It is a fabulous feeling.
Thanks @jym626
I think I’m more stressed by these college years than I was the high school years. I’m sure they’ll get successfully launched eventually. Can’t wait for that fabulous feeling
You do, but do the kids benefitting really understand the cost? If you told a kid choosing between full pay private at 60k/yr, or full-ride to an in-state flagship: “I’ll pay for the private if that’s what you want, but if you choose the in-state school I’ll buy you an 80k Porsche today and give you 160k cash when you graduate.” Would most kids still choose the private?
There are a lot of people that can easily afford a 4 year education - and I am amazed how many people are shocked and react almost insulted, that people pay for college. On the coast and big urban areas, an $80K+ Tesla is common place and you can’t touch a decent house for under a mil.That covers a lot of people nowadays, particularly well educated people themselves. $70K a year just isn’t that much for a great deal of people sitting on big real estate, and kids are landing jobs well over $100k out of college. Investing in your kids is a great thing to do, especially when you can. The social and peer environment a kid gets at college has tremendous influence on their life. But if you haven’t been there to experience the difference, it is hard to understand, and we generally only go to one college. Congrats OP, sounds like solid choice - you could and you did.
While it happens all too often, I have a negative visceral reaction to the “if you pick the cheaper school I’ll buy you a car” argument. Experiences at different schools can vary widely, and if a person is willing to provide an expensive education that perhaps is a better fit for their child, perhaps the child will be in a better position to buy their own car after they graduate.
The problem with this model is that, despite the best efforts of the PR departments at private universities, price does not equal quality either of education, experience or opportunity.
Same can be said for cars. I agree with @50N40W - a car can be replaced. The impact of what you learn, the experiences you have, the peers you interact with, that lasts a lifetime
“The problem with this model is that, despite the best efforts of the PR departments at private universities, price does not equal quality either of education, experience or opportunity.”:
There is a correlation, but it’s an imperfect one and there certainly are under-priced (and over-priced) options. Also, in the US, there isn’t a lot of variance in price charged by major (unlike some countries where some majors cost several times more than others) yet there will be distinct differences in education, opportunity, and experience.
Sorry, but it came across as a bit of humble brag, to me. Brandeis and WUSTL, "not worth it, " "mac and cheese, " but “I can afford it” and no loans.
Is this really soul searching? OP can make his/her kids “happy” for the four years. No idea what that means here. A slight mention of ratings, but no word on academic fit for the studies in mind.
IMHO, just because you can afford it, doesn’t mean it’s the right decision. Unless you don’t care how much it costs, and clearly you do, or you wouldn’t have asked. I believe it’s the wrong message to send our kids. We need to show them how to dig deeper, discern differences, figure it out on their own. How did you do it? Over and over again, we hear stories about people in our generation (hugely successful) who attended the closest public flagship because it was affordable and they made their mark. Why do we lead our kids to believe that there is only one “match” and if it costs more, it’s better?
I do like the use of cars as a currency. “The most impactful difference between these two schools is ‘that one means we drive an extra five BMWs into the river.’ can we afford five new BMWs?”
The car currency sounds like a bribe. Especially if the kid is offered a new and/or glitzy car. IMO that’s distasteful. There seems to be an assumption by some that the kids have no clue about the cost or impact of large sums of money. While that may be true for some, it is hopefully not true for all. Teaching kids to save early, to work and teaching them the value of investments and compound interest so that they have the luxury of making these kinds of choices by the time they are ready for college is invaluable. The more expensive college may be a better fit, or it may not. But it is nice to be in the position of being able to consider other factors without the almighty $$$ being the primary variable.
