<p>I'm not really worried about security at Tufts, but I'm just curious about something - when I visited, I saw a bunch of posters around campus about rape on campus - is this a big issue?</p>
<p>according to my overnight host, a bunch of the feminst organizations on campus are “trying to make sure no tufts male ever gets laid” by convincing girls that if they have sex drunk it counts as rape. I think they are trying to change the sexual abuse policy so it says intoxicated sex=rape, and they are doing this by spamming the campus with flyers and stuff.</p>
<p>eh, not quite, skateboarder. The posters you saw refer to “date rape” in its various forms. This is a legitimate problem for college age women; awareness of the problem is the first step toward education, empowerment, and most importantly, prevention. I strongly suspect your overnight host is frustrated by his reliance on solo sex. Furthermore, I seriously question Tufts’ selectivity – based on your comments – if you are indeed an admitted student.</p>
<p>yeah, sorry if i wasn’t clear, i was referring to the ones that said “i was raped on campus… were you?”</p>
<p>skateboarder is at least half right.
Obviously date rape can be a serious problem. The phenomenon skateboarder is referring to is when two people are both drunk, and both agree to have sex. Later, the girl gets uncomfortable about it, and tries to claim that the guy “took advantage”, under the justification that since she was drunk, she can’t be held accountable for her decision. But, if she can’t be held accountable since she was drunk, it makes sense that HE can’t be held accountable either, unless for some reason you believe that men should be held to a different standard of responsibility than women. That’s not rape. That’s just a mistake. Certain (not all) feminist organizations would have you believe in a double standard.</p>
<p>The situation described in NO WAY detracts from the seriousness of actual date rape: when one person forces themselves on an unwilling acquaintance. That’s a serious crime, but not one that’s particularly prevalent at Tufts.</p>
<p>Ah - the posters you saw don’t refer to any specific campus crime. As you may know, rape (real rape, not mistake “rape”) is severely under-reported. Many victims feel that the rape was somehow their fault, or that they brought it on themselves. Others are just too ashamed to report it. Of course, it is never the victim’s fault, and one should never be ashamed to speak out against an assailant. The posters you saw are there to let rape victims know that they are not alone, and to encourage them to come forward, be honest about their experience, and if possible press charges against their assailant or help others through their own struggles. The posters are by nature speculative: they’re not referring to any actual rape (because if they knew about a rape, it would already have been reported) but just encouraging any possible victims who may see it to come forward. Tufts isn’t known, or even thought, to have more rape than other campuses, but ANY rape is too much, and if there’s even a single victim on campus that those posters could help, they’re worth it.</p>
<p>skateboarder is more than half right. These organizations plainly and unambiguously state that alcohol=no consent=rape, period. Date rape is a serious problem on college campuses, but what these groups are doing are actually enabling rapists by making their actions seem ordinary, even acceptable. They are also cheapening the calamities of every rape victim in the world.</p>
<p>
You’re equating an immature comment made by a teenager as a lack of intelligence?</p>
<p>" eh, not quite, skateboarder. The posters you saw refer to “date rape” in its various forms. This is a legitimate problem for college age women; awareness of the problem is the first step toward education, empowerment, and most importantly, prevention. I strongly suspect your overnight host is frustrated by his reliance on solo sex. Furthermore, I seriously question Tufts’ selectivity – based on your comments – if you are indeed an admitted student. "</p>
<p>oh sorry, I must be a dumba$$ because i’m politically incorrect.</p>
<p>There is a significant difference between date rape/actual rape and feminazi groups trying to get some big bad men in jail for having sex while intoxicated.</p>
<p>Skateboarder, not questioning your intelligence. Just your maturity. And I apologize for replying so strongly. My bad.</p>
<p>Please hear me out a moment. Yes there is a difference between “rape” and “mistake,” however the line is blurred in these situations. Agreed, it is not a violent, forcible criminal act, but the point is that 99 times out of 100 the drunk girl would NOT have had sex if she were sober. Is it entirely her fault? I don’t know the answer to that question. Unlike some posts above, I do believe it is a legitimate question. And I absolutely disagree that discussing the issue “enables” rapists. </p>
<p>Now let’s look at this as if you just engaged in that act. You just had sex with a young lady who otherwise would’ve avoided you like plague, except that she was drunk. Is this a fulfilling experience for you? Do you feel good about this? </p>
<p>That’s an open question. I suspect your views on the subject will change over time.</p>
<p>This thread is speculation by all participants, nothing more. I suggest that when you do arrive on campus full time, you attend one of their meetings and find out what their point of view really is. I’m not saying you have to agree with them, but the free and open exchange of ideas is a far better approach than branding them “feminazis” and dismissing their feelings entirely. And who knows, you might meet a cute girl there, one who is not intoxicated. In which case I would recommend a more mature approach than your overnight host’s “get laid” prattle.</p>
<p>No one is disagreeing that it’s an unfortunate situation when someone does something drunk that they wouldn’t have done sober. I think the disagreement may lie in whether and where it is appropriate to place blame. To me and many others, where there’s rape, it’s implied that there’s a rapist. You argue that a situation in which a girl wouldn’t have slept with a guy were she in full possession of her mental faculties, but does sleep with him because she’s drunk, is rape. So, that makes the guy a rapist. But why? She consented. Well, the objection goes, she was drunk and so can’t be said to have been a responsible agent. But if he was drunk as well, why is it legally or morally incumbent upon the man to exercise responsibility? Are men somehow naturally endowed with more legal or moral agency than women? Or should we all just hold men to higher standards of responsibility than women? </p>
<p>Even if I was to grant that there can be no consent without sound mind, and thus a drunk woman can never consent to sex, if both parties are drunk then it would hold (if we take the sexes to be equal) that the man was not able to give consent either. So if any rape occurred, then they raped each other. Both are victims and both are rapists.</p>
<p>When AmbulanceChaser says that this sort of labeling enables rape, I am inclined to agree. Giving drunken consent and then withdrawing it after the fact on the basis that inebriation precludes legal consent is in fact tantamount to labeling all drunk sex as rape. So when I take my girlfriend of a year out for an anniversary dinner and afterward we go to Final</p>
<p>Apparently my second post wasn’t clear. I agree that it is not “rape,” but rather a shade of grey. In fact a proper term for the phenomenon doesn’t yet exist to my knowledge, so some people call it that. Erroneously. And yes I agree that an intoxicated man is just as incapacitated as an intoxicated woman – and in some rare cases he may be the one taken advantage of.</p>
<p>I am simply stating that it should be questioned, discussed, explored, with an attempt to understand. They are obviously concerned enough to the point that they are plastering posters all over campus. Do you honestly think they are going to those great efforts just to annoy horny college boys and empower rapists? Are you really willing to dismiss their feelings that easily?</p>
<p>Is this thread drifting away from the initial topic or is it only my idea?</p>
<p>
Equating every incident of drunk sex as rape is not “discussing” the issue. They are labeling something that occurs hundreds of times every day on every college campus as “rape”. They are telling happy couples that they’ve inadvertently “raping” each other over and over. By severely cheapening the definition of “rape”, they are enabling (real) rapists by making their actions seem less severe.</p>
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Nobody thinks that it is their intention, but the reality is that they are doing little more than “annoy horny college boys and empower rapists.”</p>
<p>FYI these groups are annoying horny college girls too, because they are labeling everyone as rapists, boy or girl.</p>
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lol you are ridiculous. A significant amount of single women, perhaps even a majority, either are on birth control or carry condoms when they “go out” to college parties. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure most girls don’t go out every weekend in hope of being rapped, unless maybe they have some weird fetish…</p>
<p>Also far greater than 1 out of 100 women are happy to brag to their friends that they “got laid” last night.</p>