<p>Sometimes life doesn't become the way you expected to be, because we live in the real world, where things among us can get in one's way, like what happened to me. From elementary to high school, I had this strange feeling that something wasn't right about my life. I unintentionally misjudged myself and undervalued my skills, in other words, I was lying to myself about who I really am. The way I lied was I wasn’t aware of my true skills. I don't know how or when I started undervaluing myself, but I was truly wrong. I know that I have better skills and have a lot to contribute. I was not operating as my true self, which made it difficult to do almost everything. Specifically for me, understanding, thinking, interacting with others, and doing activities were challenging. Now that I'm being honest with myself, I'm discovering and using my true skills to do things that I didn't know I could do. I have realized that being my true self is easier than telling myself a lie and this experience is even worse than lying to others.</p>
<pre><code>During the time of misjudging, I actually thought that the undervalued skills that I’d used were true that I was born with them. In 4th grade, I was sent from regular to special education classes, all the way through 8th grade, because I, my mother, and teachers thought I had a learning problem with comprehension. Education wasn’t the only place I’d misjudge; I had the wrong skills to interact with others and being in activities. The benefit about deceiving myself, was to escape from interacting or joining activities, because I worry about what people think of me, but I get regretful though.
In my first three years of high school, I still thought I had a learning problem with comprehension, getting along with others, and getting involved too, till I was finally aware of what the feeling was, right before my senior year started. I realized that I am better than how I was in the past. I truly have excellent understanding, thinking, great communication skills with others, and awesome in activities. After my self-awareness, I finally started using my true skills, but I’m still going through a difficult transition changing to my true self.
I took the ACT twice; my scores from both of the tests were below average. If I never lied to myself, I would’ve got a higher score from both tests; I would’ve took more challenging courses than the amount I’m taking now; I would've been very popular at my school: I would have been involved in more opportunities and activities. If I had believed in myself, all of these things could've been different. As a high school senior who is going off to college, self-deception has been the greatest battle that I’ve struggle in my life so far, but senior year is the perfect time to eliminate self-deception because it's my final chance to make everything up, by showing my true skills to my high school, and it’s going great so far though.
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<p>I still do have some special services but when I attend college, I am going to be independent, therefore, because I no longer need them not only for college. I know it's normal to not be good at anything, but I wasn't being myself and I think what one’s abilities are of defines one is. In college, I’m going to major in psychology to research how I deceived myself and make friends as well; that’s the main point of going to college, finding and showing you really are. In addition, I will be the first family member to go to attend college; I will play an ideal and successful role when I attend. </p>