can someone help scoring my essay ?

Test Preparation SAT Preparation
1

<p>assignment: Do circumtances determine whether or not we should tell the truth?</p>

<p>Although telling the truth is more appropriate to general ethic than to not, there some cases in which we should not be honest. Depending on circumstances, sometimes being frank will only worsen the situation. The evidences seen through history and moral principle of doctor are very pervasive.</p>

<p>During the civil war in U.S, thousands of innocents have died; fears spread out everywhere, thus everyone wanted to end this was as soon as possible, especially the current President: Abraham Lincoln. Eventually, he had a chance in Gritty Burgh battle in 1863, when Southern Army led by General Lee was lost and had to retreat but suddenly stuck in front of Pomona River, due to the spontaneous storm. Knowing that capturing Lee would help ceasing the war, Lincoln immediately called General Meade to engage them. However, seeing the pathetic and blood of those had fallen during the war, Meade hesitated and decided to call an attack in the morning the day after. As a result, Lee had escaped safely and thus sustained the war several years later. Lincoln was so mad, visibly, and he could have complained Meade for how inconsistent he was, but instead Lincoln decided to stay silent, because he understand how such a great general would feel when seeing his comrade died, and complaining wouldn’t help anything but may even cause Meade to retire, means losing one great general for Northern Army. Obviously in history the Northern has won, proving that Lincoln was right after all.</p>

<p>Another situation in which telling the truth will only cause trouble is when the doctor has to tell the patient about his current condition. If he will recover soon, it is not a problem, but if he may die in a near future, what should the doctor say? Should he just go straight to the fact? No, most of doctors decide to conceal the real one just tell patients that they will be alright. The aim is to help them being optimistic thus creating a small hope in saving them. Moreover, a dead person with a smile on his face is always better than those with sorrow ones, isn’t it?</p>

<p>So, although being honest is actually fit with ethic, there are cases in which dishonest is favored as well. It is the circumstances that tell us when or when no to tell the truth, because sometimes being frank will only jeopardize the current situation, or sometimes only telling lie can improve the condition.</p>

<hr>

<p>I kinda took longtime in example about Lincoln (it was the truth actually), but I managed to finish in 24minutes. However it was just becaused I memorized this example long before, as in the real test with such that long paragraph I won't have a chance -_-, so any improvement ? Tks btw.</p>

2

<br>

<br>

<p>just wanted to point out that this is borderline malpractice and probably rarely happens IRL</p>

<p>maybe ‘spin it optimistically’ but never conceal the actual facts</p>

<p>i’d honestly look into sociology a little bit, just a basic vocabulary lesson in soc can give you some really good examples for almost any essay- for example, social construction of reality, where the general perception of a scenario can generate the scenario itself… therefore, lying can produce optimal results.</p>

3

<p>Ok I got it, thanks you. But any suggest about my grammar structure ? Is it good enough ?.
Here I have another essay, plz grade it if you have time, sincerely.</p>

<hr>

<p>assignment: Is identity something people are born with or given, or is it something people create for themselves?</p>

<p>At the time we were born, we were just some ordinary people like anyone else. Despite any giving talent one might have, without his or her ambition and consistent striving toward the goal then one cannot create name for oneself. It is our exertion that defines who we are, as it can be seen tangibly through cases of many celebrities in why they are famous and others are not.</p>

<p>Born with her amazing voice, Connie Talbot now is known widely for her beauty, her smile, her compassion for poor people and also for her beautiful voice, albeit she is just twelve. However, if it was just her tone then she could not bring fame to her name as in present. Someone among us may even sing better than her, but why isn’t he or she popular? The answer lies in Connie’s ambition. She has begun singing since she was two-month olds, and then later competed in Britain Got Talent when she was just six. She said that she loved singing and bringing joyful to the world through her voice. As simple as that, this Connie Talbot has become far different from any Connie else in the world.</p>

<p>Take a look back in the past; there was also example that one only could create one’s own identity through effort. And such an epitome is Ho Chi Minh, the greatest leader in Vietnam’s history. As famous as he is in present, however, back then he was just a mediocre young adult living in a country seized by the French. So what made his name popular now? It is because he decided not to accept the situation and take a ship to France to find away to save his own country. Twenty years later, after travelling and learning much from Vietnam’s enemy France and their brother Soviet, Ho Chi minh came back and led the Vietnam’s revolution. They won eventually, but his name is always the first one we remember when we recall that event.</p>

<p>People can have choices to become just normal, where as others choose to change. This difference is what creates one’s own identification, what makes one distinct from others. However talent one was, this person could possibly be an ordinary one if he or she did not make use of it.</p>

4

<p>assignment: can people ever be truly original ?</p>

<p>We are born uniquely. Every single detail no matter how small it is makes us different from other; even between twins there are differences. So, the question “can people ever be truly original” seems fallacious. As unique as we are innately, we can make our own decision, discover new mysterious and thus make our name one and the only one in the world, such as Einstein and Connie Talbot, who will we think about when we hear about these names?</p>

<p>During Einstein’s age, heavily influenced by Newtonian’s Physics, many scientists had come to agree that they finally can get to the real truth of the universe. Naturally, new comer should not choose science to follow anymore as there was nothing left to discover. Nevertheless, Albert Einstein had spent most of his free time calculating and examining again Newton’s physics, and finally he denounced that Newton was wrong, and came up with his new theory: theory of Relativity. This theory is now accepted worldwide, though it still contains some divisive aspects. Nonetheless, such physics that had ruled the mind of scientists for over two hundred years then was proven wrong by young Albert, so could it be that there are still mysterious we could claim one for our own? The answer seems optimistically yes.</p>

<p>In addition, we do not have to discover new areas to be original: just simply being ourselves can make us different as in the case of Connie Talbot. What is it that made such a twelve years old singer as famous as she is today throughout Britain? Is it because her voice or her beauty? Maybe they do play some small roles, however the main reason is because she just be herself. “I want to bring joyful to people through my singing”, she said and she really did so. Connie sang with all she got: her love, her enthusiasm, her emotion as we can see clearly through her smile while she is singing. Consequently, she became the one and only one Connie Talbot with angel voice in the world.</p>

<p>People are striving for something new to make them a true original, and some has already lost hope. However, there are still lots of mysterious or new ideas that are waiting for us to explore, and also there are plenty of other ways to become different. The main question is how ambitious you are and how much you dare to pay to gain it.</p>

5

<h1>1 rule is to take a position on the prompt- you are good here</h1>

<h1>2 rule is your examples should be specific but your inferences should be general. You are usually ok on this but the example with the doctor is very non-specific. Did Miss Talbot “establish an identity” in #3? You never refer to her “originality” in #4.</h1>

<p>If you are going to use canned examples and try to shoe horn them into the prompt you need to be careful to make sure that you assert they fit your thesis. Yet-another-girl-singer on a talent show doesnt immediately strike the reader as “original”, nor does Lincoln’s disappointment with Meade’s pursuit of Lee immediately seem like an instance of when to tell the truth. You need to reenforce that these examples do in fact fit your thesis. </p>

<p>You are really going to face an up hill fight with your English composition, which is all over the place. I’d suggest that if you are memorizing these examples you spend your time rewriting rather than doing new essays. There are a lot of problems in your sentences and your time is best spent trying to root them out. </p>

<p>If you use your Civil War example, be aware that it is Gettysburg and the Potomac River, not Gritty Burgh and Pomona.</p>