Can you please score my SAT essay?

Test Preparation SAT Preparation
1

<p>Assignment: Is creativity needed more than ever in the world today? Plan and write an essay in which you develop your point of view on this issue. Support your position with reasoning and examples taken from your reading, studies, experience, or observations.</p>

<p>Problems have always existed, and humans have always been searching for the solutions. What are the best adapted solutions to our world’s issues? They are those generated by our creativity since more traditional procedures failed to disentangle the population from diseases, environmental disasters or social problems.</p>

<p>To begin with the medical side, several diseases like HIV or cancer are still incurable. After more than half a century of research and study, physicists and scientists have failed to find efficace solutions. Their traditional way of handling their research was useless.
Also, we can value creativity in our pursuit of reestablishing a healthy planet. In the beginning, to ensure people’s need of power, man relied of fuel and other polluting sources. It was until the threat was imminent that environmentalists began to think in creative way and found the diverse green energy sources: nuclear, solar and other energies.
Furthermore, creativity proved to be efficient in trying to find solutions for social problems. Let us take the example of the poor countries. In the past, developed countries used to endow the third-world countries thinking that might help : they were wrong. The countries remained poor because they lacked in experience and expertise in monitoring programs. So came the creativity once again to change the old policy. They transformed their aid into programs of teaching the population of poor countries to let them work and gain money on their own. Good results are illustrated by the case of some middle eastern countries that have benefited from European and American expertise,</p>

<p>In conclusion, traditional solutions do not fit anymore for today’s world problems. Innovation is needed in the medical, environmental and social fields as well as any other.</p>

2

<p>not good=(
2/12</p>

3

<p>Hmmm I think a safe score would be an 8, but I am a bit shaky on that. Some of the sentences were a bit too casual:</p>

<p>“To begin with the medical side” > Maybe medical facet, or aspect
“nuclear, solar and other energies.”> Other Energies?
“So came the creativity once again to change the old policy.” > Creativity isn’t alive</p>

<p>Sometimes it was hard to follow the pronouns, and a few cases of weak vocabulary. And the conclusion was really weak, I felt a bad aftertaste after I read “as well as any other”. And the first paragraph was pretty weak too. What I did like though, were the details and the thesis. Just work on developing them, and I’m sure you’ll be fine :D</p>

4

<p>Oh and don’t listen to Suleyman… a 2/12 is completely unreasonable.</p>

5

<p>4-6/12</p>

<p>Work on your intro paragraph. I don’t see any hint of you answering the question in there, and that’s the most important part. Without it, anything lower than a 3 is very possible. </p>

<p>Elaborate more on your examples. Provide more details!</p>

6

<p>ok thank you :-)</p>

7

<p>No thesis in your intro. You need to indicate that you’re answering the question with a “because.” Ex: Creativity is needed more than ever in the world today because it leads to ideas otherwise unmanifested when creativity is absent.</p>

<p>Or if you’re trying to make a thesis that states that something is sometimes needed, you can say “Whether or not creativity is needed more than ever in the world today depends on whether or not Bob Dylan is performing at Yankee Stadium.” – random example</p>

8

<p>BlueRedandGray thank you :slight_smile:
any other reply??</p>