@CUBuffs1 - what is your S22 thinking now? didn’t you have a baylor/cu thread? curious - and thanks for sharing that all.
@OK_tx - i’ve enjoyed reading this thread, and thanks for sharing. good luck to your daughter with choices. for us - with our last child, we want D23 to be nearby-ish. our older 3 are all 900-1300 miles away. 
– so the money isnt as important to us as the easy access; that is a blessing! just thought i’d share that one plug for your instate schools. 
BG - S22 didn’t love the CU campus (crazy I know). It is down to Baylor and U of San Diego for us.
Lots of kids from TX fly into Portland. There’s a connecting flight somewhere. Our Bowdoin son in Chicago always flies SW from Midway to Baltimore to Portland. He doesn’t mind. Cheaper than direct flights on other airlines. As adults, we would think that’s a pain but college kids are young and generally don’t mind a 7-8 hour travel day. Flying into Boston is really not the best idea. Some kids do it sometimes but it means connecting to a train in Boston via either a T ride or an uber between Logan and the train station. Timing that trip so that you arrive in Boston in time to catch a train isn’t always easy.
Regardless, my point is that a lot of students have long travel days to get to and from college and they just do it. If the OP’s D gets in and it’s affordable, I wouldn’t let travel be the thing that keeps her in TX.
@OK_tx How was the Monday TCU visit?
While I appreciate your repeated reminders to parents and students to consider the long and short term financial consequences of their decisions, I don’t think you have enough information to knowledgeably tell this parent ( or any parent, really) how her daughter is defining her self-worth.
Yea, poorly worded. I meant a bunch of things, perception of success, validation for effort, feeling that a more selective school will lead to more success going forward, etc. By all accounts she’s a solid student who will succeed no matter where she lands and is probably a little misguided as to the real impact the difference between Bowdoin and Trinity will be.
The finances are a prevailing sentiment on CC. A parent will say that they have money for tuition, and it’s still not a good enough answer for some people. Again, it’s good to understand the financial consideration, but sometimes enough is enough.
It’s rude to tell someone that they shouldn’t live in their $500K house because a $100K would still meet their family’s needs, but people on CC will tell you all day long that it’s wasteful to spend money on college, even if you have it.
My older kid has a full ride and my younger one took the best financial offer. I am all for affordable college. But sometimes people are relentless.
Read up thread. This is the last I’ll comment, but the OP has already said that they don’t have the money saved, and that it would take a substantial change in their lifestyle and leverage to attend Bowdoin. This isn’t a take the cheapest option opinion. It’s an opinion that Trinity isn’t that different than Bowdoin.
Agree. I have often asserted that I did not want to talk about money in my posts, and yet, someone would find a way to insert it into the thread.
Have you ever been to Maine? If so, I find this comment hilarious.
Bowdoin meets need without loans so I don’t know why it wouldn’t be affordable.
Colleges use different definitions of need than parents do. It depends on whether this parent finds Bowdoin affordable.
This student isn’t into Bowdoin so let’s not get too sidetracked.
OP, let us know when she decides. It’s been interesting to see how her process is playing out.
Just a reminder that the OP stated this:
“Getting into Bowdoin would be great - for her self-esteem, at the very least, which has taken a bit of a beating. Attending Bowdoin would be great for her ultimately, I think, because she will get her preferred “liberal arts college in the NE” experience. And yes, I’d spend $200K more on that education (she has a 75% scholarship to Trinity) and would have to travel further to see her, so not the best option for me. But I can do that without putting myself into a financial hole, and my kids are my life, so it’s not the biggest consideration.”
(Sorry, I’m having an issue with the quote function on my phone.)
But she’s waitlisted at Bowdoin, not accepted. OP themselves said it would be a miracle to get off the WL.
At this point it makes good sense to focus and get excited about Trinity or another of the acceptances in hand.
The issue is the OP has no FinNeed the institution would recognize, thus Bowdoin would offer no or very little FinAid making her essentially a FullPay student. OTOH, Trinity offered a very sizeable scholarship.
In this case, it isn’t exactly an issue of affordability as the OP can pay. The issue is whether or not the difference in education/fit/opportunities/etc between Trinity/Bowdoin is enough to consider attending Bowdoin (if accepted from WL) though the COA might be twice as much as Trinity.
Absolutely. No disagreement there. It just seemed the thread was going off in the “typical CC financial discussion” when that has been covered. This is a long thread and not everyone has been following along or will take the time to read all the posts.
For what it is worth, it sounds like the OP has a very reasonable grasp on her D’s choices and WL chances. Trinity is an excellent academic option, it is simply not the location/experience the student hoped for.
ah ok. Sorry. I didn’t go back and look at the financial situation. Nice that Trinity offered merit!
I’ve done this, so I’m not going to complain too loudly, but it’s common for CC posters to reply, often passionately, without having read the thread.
The tangent started with this:
My reply was to this, which directly relates to the above:
Then this popped in:
They clearly didn’t have this context:
My intent, inelegantly delivered, was to say that Trinity is a solid program. It’s not easy to get into, rejecting 66% of their applicants. The additional financial stress for the purposes of getting a win and boosting self esteem probably wasn’t worth it. Within the context of the full information in this thread, I was trying to deflect away from Bowdoin and to Trinity.
As @momofboiler1 pointed out, it’s a hypothetical anyway, so probably a non sequitur. Sorry I created the diversion. 