I was wondering if someone could tell me what my daughter’s chances at Andover, Exeter, Choate, Hotchkiss, Kent, Deerfield, and Cate are. She applied to all these schools, no financial aid and had her interviews a couple of weeks ago, and was received very well especially at Exeter.
Here are her stats(she’s applying to be a junior):
Grades:
She ended the 9th grade with As, and A-s
That same year she was accepted with full advanced eligibility to John Hopkins CTY as well.
As a sophomore, she scored in the 95th percentile in the junior PSAT
She is taking AP computer science principles and is the only sophomore in her class
Extracurriculars:
She’s been swimming for 8 years is and recently moved to a smaller local team
She is proficient in violin, piano, and guitar though she does not take lessons(self - taught pianist)
She has won Best delegate at Model UN
She volunteers 4 days a week with children under 4 at her school, she takes care of them and plays with them.
She has a 100+ community service hours
Individual Academic Decathlon
She has done multiple specialized summer camps which require applications and essays to get into
she was recently invited to the NYLF medical conference hosted by George Mason
University at Johns Hopkins
She is a great kid and has recently had a rough time after her only friend left the school midway. We got divorced fairly recently, 2years ago, so her grades in 8th grade are not amazing. At Exeter, the interviewer was very happy when she talked about her and mentioned that she wishes she could handpick students because she would’ve picked her. A common theme that we heard from all the schools was that they appreciated her authenticity, candor, and how articulate she was. She was also commended by every school for being extremely well-rounded.
I would really appreciate it if someone told me about her chances!
I certainly can’t chance her, or anyone, but she sounds like a great kid. No financial aid helps. There’s an element that is totally out of your control-- which is what the school needs. If the school’s lost several 11th grade girls, they’ll be looking to replace them and may well admit your daughter. If they have too many 11th grade girls, it doesn’t matter that your daughter is a strong candidate, they won’t take her. She’s done the best she can, and that’s all that matters.
Very few spots available for the 11th grade. Consider adding Lawrenceville in New Jersey, St. Andrew’s in Delaware & Mercersberg Academy in Pennsylvania.
Thank you, Lawrenceville is not an option simply because of the fact that multiple kids from her previous school now attend Lawrenceville, they treated her terribly and as such she is looking to get as far away from NJ as possible.
St. Paul’s School in Concord, New Hampshire may be of interest to her. Is your daughter life-guard certified ? If not, best to get certified as it can help.
Also, the United World Colleges only accept juniors & seniors. Multiple locations throughout the world. A few elite colleges & universities have scholarships set aside for UWC grads.
My daughter currently works as a lifeguard at a local gym pool, she was considered top of her class amongst adults during her certification. Based on only her instructor’s recommendation she was given the job without needing an interview.
I quite honestly would not be comfortable sending my daughter away to a different country. She is quite young for her grade, with an August birthday, and some schools have recommended repeating 10th grade, simply because of her age. She is currently being evaluated for ASD(but really its Aspergers even though it’s not considered a formal diagnosis anymore). We won’t be able to know until March, however. For these reasons, I would prefer her to go into a boarding school closer. We didn’t tell the schools about her evaluation because we wanted them to see her for who she is, not a diagnosis. We did, however, submit her IQ test results.
Most of the UWC kids we know attend for senior year plus one PG year… so you also have the option of waiting. College admissions officers LOVE UWC kids, btw.
Yes, I have heard about that, but it is very important that I get her out of her current school. The administration is falling apart and teachers are leaving in great numbers. She is also bullied at these schools, for no other reason than the fact that she would rather read then gossip. I also stated that I would not feel comfortable sending my daughter to another country.
I just looked up Culver Academies, and I don’t think it will be a right fit for my daughter, we chose the schools we did because of their use of the Harkness method. She is an auditory learner and learns very we;l in discussion-based classes, of which her current school offers very few. Also, the application dates have passed for most schools.
All selective boarding schools use discussion based classes.
Hopefully your daughter will be accepted to Exeter or to one of her other top choices, but 11th grade spots are scarce and the few available may focus on targeted needs such as athletics or other specific talent needed.
I encourage you to expand beyond schools which claim to use the Harkness Table Method as almost all, if not all, selective private schools involve extensive class based discussions as a way of learning & teaching.
P.S. While it is clear that your daughter has substantial talents & accomplishments, her profile is similiar to most students at your listed schools.
Thank you so much for your help. One thing I am worried about though is the fact that if my daughter is diagnosed, and most likely she will be, would schools rescind their acceptance if she is accepted.
My best guess is that no school would revoke an acceptance based on such a diagnosis. But, this is only a guess based on the fact that the school has already determined that your daughter succeed at that particular school.
I think you need to truly sit down and consider the question “will she thrive at a boarding school?” Socially there is very very little adult supervision for 11th and 12 graders at many boarding schools. If your daughter is diagnosed it may explain some of the reasons for the bullying - kids not understanding her behaviors, her not understanding social cues from other kids (I am NOT excusing bullying behavior, kids can be horrible period). But how will she adjust socially at a boarding school without you there to support her every night and help her work on whatever she needs to work on to make friends and be happy? However much they say they supervise the kids, believe me, it’s a whole lot less.
I would listen to schools when they recommend that she repeat 10th grade. If she is already on the young side she will be even younger in BS where many have actually repeated a year already. Being a year or two younger than classmates plus Aspergers plus away from home plus new school plus most rigorous academics she has ever encountered…that doesn’t seem like a good plan to me. Even if you only consider that the academics will be more rigorous than she is used to, entering in 11th grade can be tough and it can impact college acceptances if that matters to you at all. Having to get “up to speed” junior year is tricky.
I wish you and your daughter a good outcome. It breaks my heart reading about kids who are not being treated well by other kids and I really hope you can find a place where she can be happy and thrive.
Thank you so much for your suggestions. Surprisingly enough my daughter loves being away from home. She goes to summer camp for over a month every year. Every time she comes home, she is sad as she thrives with being independent. Also, surprisingly she only seems to have trouble with the kids in her school. Everywhere else she makes friends. I think it might be the fact that her school is almost like 150 of the same person. A lot of people underestimate my daughter as they only see her diagnosis, but with an IQ in the top 0.013%, she is absolutely brilliant. Her grades are simply a result of unfortunate social situations. She is also completing a Johns Hopkins University Genetics college course so academic rigor isn’t a huge concern for me.
P.S I want to make it clear that I do not think any of you are underestimating my daughter and I am grateful for all the advice I have received. Also, she doesn’t rely on me at all when it comes to helping or social situations. She is simply honest 24/7 and that is the only reason I am aware of these problems.
Hopefully some of those schools are looking for 11th grade girls. Your daughter sounds great and I would guess that if a school has openings for 11th grade girls and doesn’t need a specific athlete (which is what you are basically competing against - some school need) she has a good shot.
Yes, entering with Aspergers, in grade 11 after having difficulty in school is a lot to ask. At Exeter/Andover everything expects extreme independence and flexibility. Daily schedules rotate, clubs meet at different times and days, you need to figure out on your own where to fit in 3 hours of study time. It is go, go, go, and always new faces and personalities. D-hall might close while she was presenting a project, missed day of classes with a stomach bug, packing up for a class overnight trip to Boston… Harkness instruction might be two hours of a typical day, the other 17 hours (subtracted sleep time) needs exceptional independence and flexibility. As @one1ofeach wrote, is this really the best fit regardless of academic ability? These kids are (close to) 100% independent 20 hours a day when they are not in class. The academic demands are fractional to the organizational, social, and self-directed demands.
This is not meant to sound insulting. Just keep in mind these school are not 12 hour days of academic instruction and formal study halls. You are sending her to a demanding college. The “prep” in prep school is more like, here is a free chance to sink or swim that won’t ruin your future resume.
Will she be happy? I hope so. I wish everyone who takes the time to come here finds the right school. But don’t base the choice on the academics.
Have you considered all-girls schools or even just smaller schools? I worry about large schools for a kid on the spectrum. It is easier to slip through the cracks and girls on the spectrum tend to struggle in ways that are invisible to most adults.