Choices for a gay student...

College Search & Selection
1

<p>So, I'm gay, and I want to have the best possible time in college, I mean who wouldn't? Here's the problem, Notre Dame is probably the school that I love the most, which is a problem since they are quite religious. Is there anyone who can give me insight on whether or not it is even worth it to apply to Notre Dame if I'm gay? Keep in mind this has been my dream school since I was five, but I don't know if I will be able to attend because of my sexual orientation.</p>

<p>The other schools that I am considering are Northwestern, Georgetown, Vanderbilt, Ohio State, and UNC Chapel Hill.</p>

<p>Should I stick with the latter? Does anyone have any information or advice they could give me?</p>

2

<p>Notre Dame is very religious-oriented. Growing up in a Catholic household I can tell you that the Catholic Church is not very sensitive to gay and lesbian people. However, I do think that you will find people who will accept you where ever you go. I also think it would be a good idea to look at the towns these schools are located in, because some may have very liberal communities! But don’t let your sexual orientation keep you from attending your dream school! If you want it, go for it. </p>

<p>My last piece of advice, check out Indiana University. It’s a great school, very liberal, and Bloomington is known as the gay capital of the midwest. My best friend goes there and loves it (he’s gay as well).</p>

3

<p>It is a HUGE problem. Notre Dame is one of, if not THE, most conservative Catholic colleges. Georgetown is also Catholic, but it’s a lot more liberal. You’d be much more likely to find an accepting community at any of the other choices you listed. </p>

<p>Notre Dame has a history of being anti-LGBT. You wouldn’t be the only gay student, but it really is not a friendly environment.</p>

<p>[Notre</a> Dame Student Paper Prints Cartoon Advocating Gay Bashing| News | Towleroad](<a href=“http://www.towleroad.com/2010/01/notre-dame-student-paper-prints-cartoon-advocating-gay-bashing.html]Notre”>http://www.towleroad.com/2010/01/notre-dame-student-paper-prints-cartoon-advocating-gay-bashing.html)
[Off</a> Topic: Homophobia Still a Huge Issue at Notre Dame Open Economics](<a href=“http://openeconomicsnd.■■■■■■■■■■■■■/2010/01/15/off-topic-homophobia-still-a-huge-issue-at-notre-dame/]Off”>Off Topic: Homophobia Still a Huge Issue at Notre Dame | Open Economics)
[A</a> moral outrage - Viewpoint - The Observer - University of Notre Dame and Saint Mary’s College](<a href=“http://www.ndsmcobserver.com/viewpoint/a-moral-outrage-1.2790404#.UBBez7RDySo]A”>http://www.ndsmcobserver.com/viewpoint/a-moral-outrage-1.2790404#.UBBez7RDySo)
[url=&lt;a href=“HuffPost - Breaking News, U.S. and World News | HuffPost”&gt;Wheaton College Is Nation's Least LGBT-Friendly School, For Second Time In Three Years | HuffPost Chicago]Wheaton</a> College Is Nation’s Least LGBT-Friendly School, For Second Time In Three Years<a href=“lists%20Notre%20Dame%20as%206th%20most%20LGBT-unfriendly%20campus”>/url</a></p>

4

<p>As a gay student myself, having gone through catholic high school and having many friends at Notre Dame, I would not recommend Notre Dame. While my high school was wonderful, and my friends who all go to Notre Dame are lovely people, there are very large ideological differences. </p>

<p>If Notre Dame is like Boston College, their LGBTQ community is likely quite small and not widely supported by university administration. </p>

<p>I would recommend your other choices over Notre Dame, and there are a large number of schools not on your list that I would recommend that are very LGBTQ friendly.</p>

5

<p>Thanks for the responses! What schools would anyone recommend that aren’t on my list?</p>

6

<p>NYU has the best LGBT-friendly community among all colleges. Even the Princeton Review’s “The Best 376 Colleges” claims it, which is derived from the experiences of many current students.</p>

<p>I know Notre Dame is your top choice, but if you really want a happy college experience go to NYU.</p>

7

<p>Would you be willing to go further north than DC? It seems as though your schools are centered further south. </p>

<p>If you’d like to stay in the south, Emory has a vibrant gay scene.</p>

8

<p>For ones not on your list, I highly recommend checking out <a href=“http://www.campusclimateindex.org%5B/url%5D”>www.campusclimateindex.org</a>. Not every college is on there, but those that are will have a good break-down of the environment on campus for LGBT students. </p>

<p>The top earners on that site are Stanford, Minnesota-Twin Cities, and Oregon. Any score 3 or higher will indicate a generally friendly environment. But a 5 means a really supportive administration and active student organizations. </p>

<p>Notre Dame isn’t even on that list, and there’s no way they wouldn’t know about it. Colleges are surveyed for the list by choice, so the fact that Notre Dame isn’t there probably says something about their attitude.</p>

9

<p>Man, as a gay individual, you sure have a lot of choices in poor areas for gays. The idea is to get farther from the south, not closer. I have nothing against the south, it’s just obvious it’s definitely less likely for a gay individual to be happy in the south as opposed to other geographically accepting regions in the US. Get rid of your southern/catholic/religious schools and add schools that are in liberal (not extremely conservative) states. Obvious good choices are the states of New York (NYU, Columbia) and California (Berkeley, Stanford, UCLA, USC).</p>

10

<p>The state of Massachusetts is pretty liberal accepting towards gays, as you probably know. The mayor of Boston just wrote a letter to Chick-Fil-A saying that they weren’t even allowed to be in the city because of their views. Try checking out schools like Boston U, Northeastern, Boston College, etc. Or any other school in the Northeast really. They have great schools out there that you should really check out. The more urban, the more accepting they are :)</p>

<p>As for the choices you’ve already listed, I’d say don’t go any farther south than Georgetown. After there, I mean, the majority of people my age strongly support gay marriage, but there’s still a sizable population that is against it (If you count the adults in the area it’s almost 50-50).</p>

11

<p>I’m like the OP, gay and wanting to have a great time in college. Still I guess I’m a bit skeptical about the rankings and stuff. Like, I’d want to attend an accepting college, but most schools are. Between a school with an LGBT Support Center, several queer clubs, “gender-neutral” bathrooms or whatever and like 20 gay guys, and a school lacking in those departments but a vibrant dating scene, I’d easily prefer the latter. I’m not sure if rankings consider my preferences in that sense, but it’d be informative to hear a less clinical and more personable approach :)</p>

12

<p>Contrary to what many people on here seem to believe, there are actually plenty of colleges in the south that a gay student could feel welcome at.
Urban areas tend to be more liberal, so while you might not feel as welcome out on the countryside, you could be plenty happy going to a college in a city. If you look at Texas for example, which is considered a very conservative state, many of the major cities are actually very liberal. Austin and Houston both had a Democratic majority at the last elections.
In addition to urban areas having more liberal tendencies, college campuses tend to be hubs of liberal ideas. There are actually very few colleges that tend to be conservative. Trust me, as a gay student myself I’ve done A LOT of research on the matter and have a pretty good idea of which schools would be good, and which wouldn’t. During my college search one thing that I found helpful was googling the specific school that I was looking at and then also typing in “College Confidential” and “Gay Friendly”, so if you were looking at Emory you would search “College confidential emory gay friendly” and get links like this: <a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/emory-university/296385-gay-friendly.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/emory-university/296385-gay-friendly.html&lt;/a&gt;
Someone else posted a link to Campus Climate, and while I think that CC is a good resource, it only accounts for resources by the school, and not student attitude, so if the school had an LGBTQ minor, but extremely ignorant and conservative students it would get points for that. So, overall just take that with a grain of salt.
When picking a gay-friendly college, another thing you have to do is define what you actually want. Do you want a large school where 50% of the guys are gay like NYU, or would you be happy with a school with a regular proportion of gay guys, but a perfectly accepting student body. When I approached this question I decided I just wanted to have a friendly student body, because really, how many other gay guys do you need? Most likely you would only have a romantic relationship with a few of them during your college years, so why would you need 2,000 of them? Also, even if you wanted to surround yourself with LGBT friends, you only need so many friends. So, here are my rules for making sure a college is LGBT friendly (only apply this after you’ve narrowed down your colleges.</p>

<p>1) If it’s a northern school it’s most likely fine.
2) If it is a religious school make sure that religion is not actually a big deal. Some schools like Emory have an official religion, but that doesn’t affect the students.
3) If it is a southern school, make sure it is liberal by searching CC.
4) If it has a large frat scene you may also want to check on CC if it’s gay friendly. Sorry to everyone in frats, but many of the “party guys” tend to be less progressive.</p>

<p>During my college search I was really interested in going to school in the south, since I hate the cold, so here’s what I found out about a lot of top schools in the south. Also, I just want to say first that although I’m going to say that some of them are conservative, or not the best environment, I think that unless it’s some kind of hub for homophobia like BYU it wouldn’t be the worst thing if you went there, only you might be slightly happier elsewhere.</p>

<p>Vanderbilt: Slightly more conservative than peers, but still pretty good. Is big on frats so while there probably wouldn’t be genuine hatred you might find some people who are just ignorant or rude. Overall it could be a good experience, but if you are really interested I would look into it more.
Emory: One of the most gay friendly colleges in the south. I’ve heard almost all good things about LGBT life there, and on top of that, it’s in Atlanta which is very gay friendly.
Rice: Is also very gay friendly, and has accepting students, although just because it’s a smaller school it has less gay students. (I’m applying here ED)
Tulane: Accepting school with some cases of ignorance
UMiami: Accepting school, some cases of ignorance, but it’s also near South Beach which I’ve heard is like a gay mecca. Apparently there are lots of gay guys here.
Georgetown: When I visited it seemed like a great place. It is a jesuit school but I’ve heard that they are tolerant of gays, just not abortion. I didn’t want to go here because I dislike religion, but I think gay students here would be fine.
Johns Hopkins: Pretty gay friendly
UT Austin: Pretty gay friendly (I think it was rated one of the most gay friendly colleges)
UVA: I’ve heard that this one might lean on the conservative side, I haven’t done much research on it, but I’d be cautious.
Washington and Lee: I’ve heard it’s conservative.
Duke: Gay friendly with a few conservative students
UNC: Pretty gay friendly</p>

<p>Ok, well I took a long time to type all my thoughts out :slight_smile: I’ve done a lot of research on the topic of LGBT colleges, and I think I’ve looked through most of the threads on it on CC, so if you have any more questions feel free to PM me. All my knowledge on LGBT friendly colleges might as well help someone :p</p>

<p>Good Luck</p>

13

<p>I second the suggestion in post #8 above to check out Campus Climate Index. It shows 42 colleges and universities with 5 stars out of a possible 5 in LGBT-friendliness, including schools like Stanford, Minnesota, Ohio State, Penn, U Washington, Oberlin, Carleton, Michigan, UC Berkeley, Cornell, Princeton, Syracuse, UCLA, American, Chicago, Amherst, Brown, and Emory. It’s no accident that most of these are in the North and West. It’s also no accident that not a single religiously-affiliated school appears on that list of A+ performers. That’s not to say you can’t have a positive experience at other schools or in some carefully chosen corners of the South, but the cultural divide on this question is pretty stark, and IMO even the most “liberal” corners of the South would tend to be pretty middle-of-the-road by Northern standards.</p>

14

<p>If Notre Dame is your dream school, you should go there. The Catholic Church’s official policy towards LGBT people is that they should be treated with kindness and respect, even if they do not agree with their lifestyle.</p>

<p>I don’t believe you will be harassed for being gay at Notre Dame. They do have an LGBT organization that can provide you with support if you feel lost or left out: [Core</a> Council for Gay and Lesbian Students // University of Notre Dame](<a href=“http://corecouncil.nd.edu/]Core”>http://corecouncil.nd.edu/)</p>

<p>They only real problem I can foresee coming from you being gay would be the lack of a dating community for LGBT students.</p>

<p>Don’t let fear or limitations decide your life. Follow your dreams and blaze the trail if you have to.</p>

15

<p>As others said, definitely look at the index. You should also google “best colleges for LGBT students” and so on, and you’ll get lots of hits.</p>

<p>I’d also agree with the rule of thumb to avoid the South and religious schools in general if you want to maximize tolerance of LGBT people. To that end, the Northeast and the West are probably the best, and cities tend to be better than rural or suburban areas.</p>

<p>As much as you love ND, it really isn’t an ideal place for gay students. Take [url=<a href=“http://news.change.org/stories/notre-dame-s-anti-gay-problem]this[/url”>http://news.change.org/stories/notre-dame-s-anti-gay-problem]this[/url</a>] for example.</p>

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<p>If everyone followed official church doctrine on these matters (“love thy neighbor” and so on), we wouldn’t have this problem. Unfortunately, some people don’t care what the “official policy” is; they’re biased regardless.</p>

16

<p>Completely disagree with pinklemonade222. That doesn’t mean I don’t think you should follow your dreams. But if you’re dream was jumping off a cliff I’d definitely recommend rethinking your dream. I’m not comparing Notre Dame as suicide for a gay individual, but unless there is something much more to Notre Dame besides the “I like this college” feeling, you will probably have a worse time there than other friendlier schools. Can you have the time of your life there? Yes, of course. But looking at this in a logical and non-emotional point of view unlike the above poster, it really doesn’t make sense to go to Notre Dame when there are much much better options waiting for you that you have a substantially higher probability of having a healthier and extremely happy life at. Doesn’t make sense at all unless there’s something about Notre Dame for you besides the “this college is really cool” reason, which there might be (only you know that for sure).</p>

17

<p>Some people have already mentioned on here that you can still go to ND, but it’s harder to be open about it. The most gay-friendly colleges are likely located in cities, like NYU and USC. </p>

<p>I’m gay, too, btw and I just transferred to USC. The best decision I’ve made in my life.</p>

<p>I wouldn’t completely rule out a school though because the valedictorian of my high school, who is gay, chose Georgetown over Berkeley. It just really depends on your tolerance and the people around you.</p>

18

<p>Attitudes are changing all over the United States. It’s far more of a generational thing than a regional thing. The vast majority of people in our children’s generation, no matter in which part of the country they live, don’t care whether someone’s gay or straight. All these laws/amendments against gay marriage (which are in states all over the country, not just the South) will be repealed in 20-30 years.</p>

<p>The stereotypes on here about the South are, once again, eye-rolling. I live in the South – and not in a city. There are a number of churches (including several Baptist churches) within a 50-mile radius that perform union ceremonies for gay people. There are support groups for gay students in just about every state university, as well as in some of the religiously-affiliated schools. Our high school, in an area that leans more politically conservative, has a Gay-Straight Alliance, and although it’s probably ruffled a few feathers, there has been no public outcry against it.</p>

<p>Just like you would ANYWHERE in the country, you have to look at the county/town rather than the whole region. While there are areas of NC where gay people would definitely not feel comfortable showing affection, there are very accepting areas as well. UNC has a very supportive environment for gay people. Chapel Hill has an openly gay mayor, and Carrboro, right next door, elected a gay mayor in 1995. Other counties that opposed the marriage amendment and that have well-known universities include Durham (Duke), Raleigh (NC State), Mecklenburg (UNC-Charlotte), Buncombe (UNC-Asheville), and Watauga (Appalachian), plus Chatham (spillover from UNC).</p>

<p>Gender-neutral housing has been an issue recently in some schools, and there is a lot of parental opposition. However, the opposition is TOTALLY about the possibility of heterosexual couples “shacking up” in dorms. :slight_smile: It has nothing to do with people’s opinions about gay students.</p>

<p>Moreover, I know a number of gay couples who live very openly near me, and none of them are clamoring to move to the North.</p>

<p>There is absolutely no reason to exclude Southern schools from consideration. I would contact a campus group for gay students and ask questions, maybe arrange a tour from their perspective. Good luck!</p>

19

<p>I am once again completely offended by the stereotypes being propagated by people like g0ld3n. Like Marsian said, there are lots of accepting communities, churches, and people. Maybe it’s not the majority, but college campuses are often the most liberal environments. </p>

<p>Did you know that many public and private schools in NC, including Appalachian and Wake Forest, have extended benefits to faculty and staff’s same-sex partner, defying the lack of a state law on the matter?</p>

<p>It is possible, in fact I daresay easy, for an LGBT student to find a college that will accept them in the south. When you say things like “the south is a poor area for gays,” YOU are the one stereotyping and judging people now.</p>

20

<p>Wow, thank you guys so much for replying, I’m relieved to have you tell me what the research that I have been doing has said all along, it really has helped, since it’s totally new territory for me and my family. So which schools should I drop and which schools should I add? My parent only going to pay for about eight applications max, and I already visited UNC and it was nice but nothing fantastic, I haven’t visited Vanderbilt though. Since these are my only really southern schools should I switch to USC and Berkeley?</p>