<p>my father worked at the world trade center previous to 9/11 and he never made it to work that day because i had stalled him because it was my first day coming home alone and i coudlnt get my new house key to work, so he fiddled with his and gave it to me after me trying to open it for 20 mins it worked. i remember this entire day in great depth and i was wondering if it was cliche to write about 9/11 or this was something different because i was actually the innocent 6th grader who saved my fathers life?</p>
<p>well, i wouldn't write just on that. Instead, find some moral or lesson you leanred from it that has made you a better person. =)</p>
<p>I figured...thanks though.</p>
<p>If this affected you greatly, write about it. Don't try to be profound. Just tell them about you and how it affected you. You don't need to find a moral or something about it that "made you a better person", just that it changed you.</p>
<p>^^^I agree, though the affect/change you describe in your essay has to be meaningful to your application. Also, don't dwell too much on the fate/coincidence aspect. Rather than suggesting the event proves some great personal skill of being lucky, explain how you came to terms with it, how it affected you, or relate it somehow to your personality/skills/what you can contribute to a college environment. </p>
<p>I personally think that it would be a very difficult essay to write given that it happened so long ago, that you run the risk of having an overly tragic narration (and possibly a cliche one), and that it doesn't really give you the chance to broadcast your personal qualities and/or interests that are relevant to college admissions (although this can be dealth with by focusing more on what you have done differently since or if it's led to some interest which has lead you to a prospective major, etc.). </p>
<p>Right now, this is what you seem to have:
[quote]
...this was something different because i was actually the innocent 6th grader who saved my fathers life?
[/quote]
I see all three problems mentioned above - a bit too dramatic ("saved fathers life" - even if it is true, matters of life and death aren't really great topics in admissions essay; it's not very down to earth), it's based on something that happened a long time ago (doesn't say much about who you are now), and doesn't reveal much about your personality/interests/strengths.</p>
<p>But if you're a strong writer and feel this event is key to understanding you as an applicant, then don't hesitate to try it out!</p>
<p>Actually I think its a fabulous subject. Unlike the other 10,000 applicants who "realized that there were truly evil people in this world and that its our job to fight them," you actually saved someone, it affected you moreprofoundly than taking away your idealism. However, if you go forward with this subject, which I thin, you should, I would ignore the word "profound."</p>
<p>I also think that this could be a great essay. My only question is what point/purpose will the essay be getting at? I agree with everyone who said don't try to be too profound, but the essay still shouldn't just be "plot summary" for lack of a better phrase. By telling this story what are you getting at? You shouldn't be writing it just to let the admissions officers know that when you were in sixth grade you delayed your father and ultimately saved his life; that's superficial. Just be sure to write about the effect that it had on you. I don't know if its possibly to be cheesy about 9/11, but don't over do it. Just be honest.</p>