<p>hi there, i'm applying to MSU as a transfer student, could you please read my essay and tell me how much fixing does it need. Please be harsh, thanks</p>
<p>Michigan State University recognizes that an assortment of interests, viewpoints, and life experiences are important in student learning and enhance the university community. Describe an experience, passion, or characteristic that illustrates what you would contribute to the MSU community and how this will add to the overall richness of campus life. </p>
<p>Let me start off by one of my favorite quote, ”A creative man is motivated by the desire to achieve, not by the desire to beat others.” So for those who know me they would say that I hate to give up, no matter how hard it gets, no matter how long it take, once I start something I’m determined to take it to the finish line. Life is full of vivid experiences, some good and some you know you will eventually will make through. I still remember the day I got home from college and learned my grandma was diagnosed with cancer. With my siblings in different states and parents at work I was the sole person responsible for taking care of her. I had to shuffle between my job, school and her chemotherapy, keeping up with doctor visits and at the same time trying to study for exams. Needless to say it affected my grades, even through all this work I was able to salvage B's and C's on my report card. Although several C's on my first transcript may not seem like adequate grades to most colleges, I viewed these grades as a moral victory that showcased just how hard I worked to overcome my challenges. My grandma always used to say there’s nothing that can stop you if you believe in yourself. So after she passed away couple of years ago I knew I had to finish what I started long time ago, after all the road to success does not here, so I went on and finished my associates with 3.66 GPA. So what do I bring with me to Michigan State, I believe that I would thrive at Michigan State University because I possess many qualities that are necessary in becoming a successful student. Michigan State would not only be able to heighten my intellectual ability, but also be able to teach necessary social skills and traits that are essential in today's workforce. With a campus this diverse, I would have the opportunity to befriend and meet people from all corners of the world and work with people who share totally different beliefs and traditions than me. To Michigan State, I will bring with me the belief that hard-work is essential for developing moral character. I plan on having this attitude not only influence others, but also rub off on them too. </p>