College Essay

<p>This essay is also for UNC, however this is the long essay (500 word limit) I need help cutting this essay down by 200 words also I need it to be more powerful also. And of course any grammar mistakes please fix it! </p>

<p>I really want this essay to be good because it is my only chance of hopefully getting in and i really could use some advice, so please help! Thanks! </p>

<p>Friday October 10, 2009, is a day that I will never forget. It was a typical, sunny Friday afternoon; my friend and I were talking on the phone discussing our plans for the night. Our conversation was the same as always nothing bizarre. She was on her way to the doctor's office for a regular check-up. Yet, looking back to that day everything seemed to wrong. That day she was told that she had thyroid cancer, and she was in need of surgery that week. Just like that, her world was turned up side down, everything was spinning out of control, and all she wanted to ask for was survival. At first when she told me, I could not believe it. I thought it was one of her jokes. After I realized she was telling the truth, I just froze. My body went numb; it was as if my body had been in a cold tub of water and it was just about to shut down. Yet, I still didn't believe her what she was saying. It was like a beginning of a fairy tale; something gut-wrenching happens at beginning of the story but by the end everything turns out to be perfect. I kept trying to tell her the doctor made a mistake, and that he didn't know what he was talking about. It wasn't that I didn't believe it my body wouldn't let me respond and let it process. I was having a ping-pong match with it; one second it would hit me, then next I thought I was crazy for believing it and threw the idea out of my head. I have always been one of those people who thinks that nothing bad will ever happen to me or to the people around me. My mind thinks my life is a fairy tale and that there is always a happy ending.
I kept on living my life as if nothing had happened and everything was the same. The sad part was I felt that the people around me were exaggerating and being dramatic. However, those were the people that showed emotion, and portrayed themselves as sensitive humans unlike myself. I was getter more inhuman by the second; I was getting annoyed at everyone for overreacting and even making a big deal out of this situation. It wasn't until I saw her after her surgery, the next Friday that I realized that this was actually happening. It was like an electric shock, unexpected and sudden. It took just one glance to make the tears fall. I was crying uncontrollably. I kept thinking to myself how stupid I looked crying in front of her, and that this was the last thing she needed. But just watching her lie there, not being able to move in that hospital bed made my heart want to burst out of my chest. Having her lie there, looking as pale as the wall next to her, made me want to scream as loud as I could.
A few days later, I realized something that I would never have if it wasn't for this situation. I was able to see what was going on. It was as if the clouds had moved and the stars had come out for the first time. I realized being healthy is a great aspect. Every day instead of waking up and thanking God that we are alive and well, we complain and whine about getting out of bed and going about our day. We go about worrying what to wear, or what someone else thinks of us; we waste our time worrying about the smallest and most irrelevant aspects in life. It is better to be happy we are alive and well for another day in this beautiful world. Instead, like other privileges we have, we also take this for granted. Most people never truly appreciate what God has given them, until it has been snatched away. I was able to see what God was trying to do. I learned that it is not what kind of thing happens to you, but it is how we react in a situation. In this case, maybe God made her sick on purpose, so we all can wake up and understand what things are the most important in our lives.</p>