Colleges for 2E gender non binary kid

Hi there,
My child is a junior in HS and identifies as gender non binary. They are academically gifted and seeking a LAC where they can be academically challenged (brilliant in math and physics but also love history and English among other things - want a broad education for themselves in the undergraduate level rather than specialization). Great grades and very high SAT score but because of attention challenges and anxiety will benefit from small classes and personal attention.
Can anyone recommend LACs where gender non binary kids feel accepted and comfortable, the Academic caliber is high and being a geek doesn’t mean you’re marginalized either (my child loves D&D, magic the gathering and seeks a college where they can find community for these hobbies as well) and where faculty and administration actually cares aboout the students as human beings.
I realize this is a tall order - but would really appreciate your thoughts.

Honestly I think most of the highly selective LACs would fit these criteria-- there really are a diversity of people there. The one I’m most familiar with is Swarthmore (I’m an alum, and my son just graduated) and I think your child would be very comfortable there. The big issue would be whether your child has the whole package to be admitted. It sounds like they might. I would focus on finding the right school in terms of admittance probability (and affordability if that’s an issue, as it is for most) and then later look into the details of fit for your child. I think that’s probably the least of your concerns, funny enough.

Depending on details of self-identification, Mount Holyoke (and possibly some of the other women’s colleges): https://www.mtholyoke.edu/policies/admission-transgender-students

Oberlin.

Allegheny. I can PM you if you’d like some specifics or a contact person (my adult daughter, who is a faculty member there).

Not a LAC, but American in DC is very supportive of Non-Binary students. All staff/professor name tags give the preferred pronouns and non-binary is an option for students in gender identification. They also have a hall that is specific for students who wish to room on a non-gender specific basis. I believe the LGBTQ community is very active. My son and his friends attended a game night in the first week of school because one of their friends did not realize that “Pride Game Night” was an LGBTQ event. My son said the club students thought the mix up was pretty funny and he and his friends stayed to play Catan. Also my son brought his D&D gear to college and immediately was inundated with other students wanting him to teach them to play – this was just kids on his floor.

To add to my post (#4): My daughter has both professional and personal expertise in this subject. Let me know if you want her contact info.

Reed is a top producer of future PhD’s in all of those areas of interest, and has lots of students who share your child’s hobbies as well. Not only is the school very inclusive, but Portland as a city is also quite LGBTQ+ friendly (although like the rest of the pacific northwest it has its regressive elements too). Reed is definitely an experience-the-vibe-for-yourself kind of school but based on your criteria it would be one of the first places I would look at - very high caliber academics and possibly the kind of community you’re looking for as well.

Sarah Lawrence seems perfect–especially for the personalized teaching and curriculum
(Swarthmore mentioned above fits except for the 2E part – it’s so competitive that I doubt a 2E person could stay caught up there.)
Bard College–very welcoming and has stronger sciences than Sarah Lawrence
Vassar – very welcoming and strong in all categories but harder to get into, also non-competitive student body
Any of the women’s colleges – Look at Agnes Scott, Hollins and Simmons in addition to the 7 sisters (or what’s left of the 7 sisters). Agnes Scott has astrophysics specialty; Sweet Briar and Smith have engineering
Mills too
Scripps
Hendrix
Southwestern U in Texas
New School
NYU
Wesleyan

Carleton.

Vassar

Second vote for Reed.

Reed is the obvious suspect in this case. Maybe Bates or Middlebury would fit the bill as well.

Scripps is part of the Claremont consortium and they do tend to trend conservative. Hendrix is in Arkansas and that’s not the most friendly state for exploring gender identity or lack thereof.

OP should concentrate on the West Coast and and New England for potential fit schools.

Any top LAC would be great. The kids these days are very open and supportive of difference. Your student should look at cultural preferences. Sporty and outdoors oriented or more arts focused. All schools have both of course, but each school finds itself culturally fitting somewhere along a spectrum of interests.

Yes, Reed comes to mind as an obvious school to consider but so does Wesleyan, Macalester. Oberlin, Swarthmore as do other selective liberal arts colleges. All of these schools have reputations of combining accepting student bodies and stellar academics Fit is important at these schools so if you can, do some initial research and give yourself time to make some college visits.

My current junior has a lot in common with yours. Identifies as trans rather than nonbinary, likely math or cs major, and isn’t sure about size of school so our list currently includes both LACs and universities. Also grades are very good but not perfect (UW GPA around 3.85 now I think IIRC). On her list now - Berkeley, UC Davis, UCSC, UCSB (all in state for us); Oregon State (safety), Reed, Carleton, St Olaf, Case Western Reserve, Oberlin, U of Rochester, Vassar, Wesleyan, NYU, Tufts, Brown. There are a few more that aren’t entirely written off but less likely at this point - Rice, Harvey Mudd, Wash U, U of Chicago - all big reaches and in most cases, in hot-weather climates which is a major thumbs-down for her. BTW University of Oregon apparently has a nice dorm for gender-nonconforming kids. I think they have a good honors college program as well.

If they are okay with cold and rural, Grinnell would be a great fit. Son plays D&D twice every weekend. Grinnell has high grad school acceptance rate, open curriculum allows for lots of exploration, great advisers, lots of diversity in terms of gender, sexual, international students, socioeconomic, geeks and athletes. And students are all very accepting, I also think there are a lot of 2E kids on campus.

Wow, thank you so much for your helpful responses. We will start visiting in February and many of the colleges mentioned are in our list. I will look into the ones I am not familiar with. Very grateful.

Bowdoin would be another good possibility.

Make sure though that the location of the school is accepting of non traditional lifestyles though. For example, Reed is in Portland and is the city itself is very open, but much of Oregon outside of the university towns tend to be conservative. Grinell is probably pretty open, but Iowa is a solid red state.

My kid is gender non-conforming and a huge geek, and is going to Middlebury, but we looked through multiple colleges and checking these things out. I think that you’re correct in focusing in small selective LACs, and I would also recommend that you look at https://www.campusprideindex.org/, though hasn’t yet ranked a lot of colleges.

I would also recommend that you look at the area around any LAC, since your kid will be exploring the area around campus as well.

  • On edit I see that @Hamurtle already mentioned this

@Dustyfeathers Southwestern U is a Christian college and not selective, and does not have a non-discrimination policy regarding gender identity or gender expression, Hendrix is also Christian, and scores only 2.5/5 on Campus Pride’s Pride Index, Mills College isn’t selective, and NYU is pretty large, but the rest of the list is pretty good. St Olaf is officially a Christian college, but it seems fairly LGBTQ friendly.