Is this an ok essay idea/too cliché?
talk about how as a child I was selfish, constantly wanted new stuff, wasn’t satisfied and then as I became older I because tuned into what was happening in my community and world and how I transcended into adulthood by focusing more on intellect and helping the world around me
Very broad. Hone in on an activity unique to you and write about that. Everybody was selfish when they were children.
I don’t think good essays always come from rare topics. Even the most clichéd topic could become a great essay depending on how you write it. I know a friend who wrote about getting bad grades and improving them, which is the most clichéd topic you could ever read, and was accepted to a really selective school. I read his essay and thought it reflected his positive personality very well. If you have great confidence in it, I say you go for it, rather than forcefully looking for unique topics to write about.
Thank you so much for the input!
It is a bit general. Try to think of one specific event that you could write about in detail.
Falls into the “tell, don’t show” trap. Pick a smaller example, and show through your behavior before and after how you changed. Avoid the self-analytical pronouncements.
As mentioned by others, focus on one incident that deeply affected you and forced you to change your selfish attitude.
The theme of going from self-centered to community-oriented is always good, never gets old. What will make this a good essay is specificity about the events in your community and how you responded. Line up two or three events, and show your personal shift, and you got yourself a good essay.
Hope that helps.
Chris