Common application statement. I would greatly appreciate suggestions

<p>I would appreciate any suggestions please. I just found this site, so I know it is last minute.
The raspy coughing noise echoed throughout the entire house, causing my heart to ache terribly but surely my pain was nothing compared to the agony he patiently endured. The hope that he would get better faded with each piercing cough until there was none left. The coughing became louder each night and more alarming symptoms began to appear before my eyes. However, despite his worsening condition, my grandfather’s determination to fight for his life never wavered. By witnessing his strength and tremendous courage throughout this difficult ordeal, I became I better person and a stronger individual.
During that last summer of his life, my once prominent selfishness slowly faded, as I resolved to put the needs of my grandfather and family above my own. His cancer quickly threw me into adulthood, forcing me to leave my childish irresponsibility behind in order to be there for the people I love. The compassion I learned from my experience with my grandfather’s illness and the zeal I gained for caring for my fellow human beings has transformed me into a loyal friend, a thoughtful daughter, a motivated student, and an active member of society. I learned the importance of caring for others and helping people whenever the situation arises, valuable lessons I continue to carry with me years after his death. I started to focus on how I could truly make a difference in the world. The desire to become a better human being and to quell that helplessness I felt at my inability to help my grandfather, drove me to a love for the medical field.
My love for medicine was further solidified when I attended a ten-day conference called The National Leadership Conference for Medicine and Healthcare at Northwestern University. Simple activities such as learning to suture, conversing with hospital staff, and debating current health issues increased my interest in becoming a member of this noble profession. Volunteering at a nursing home has also given me the experience of interacting with actual patients. Both of my parents being doctors, I have grown up witnessing the endless phone calls at all hours of the day, the piles of charts scattered throughout the house, the late-night hospital rounds, and the stress associated with the medical profession. In spite of the demanding hours, the tremendous amount of work, and the years of study required of those entering medicine, I believe my strong work ethic and my desire to be beneficial to the rest of my community will help me succeed in this profession.
Medicine would allow me to aid others and ease their pain. Even though my grandfather could not be saved, the medical field will allow me the opportunity to heal others with similar diseases. By pursuing this field, I believe I can lead a rewarding existence that is dedicated to the service of others. I will enter medicine hungry for the knowledge to help others and eager to learn ways in which I can improve society. Whether I become a physician, surgeon, or a researcher striving for the cure for cancer, I hope to do something deserving of my grandfather’s memory and beneficial to the rest of humanity.</p>