<p>I am trying to get into USNA, but my parents are a hard sell on the subject. So i'm asking the parents that have already been through this, what were your doubts and how was peace-of-mind brought about?</p>
<p>lots of doubts..mostly by the mom (me i'm afraid)....but when we sat down with our son our goal was for him to find his "best fit"....and we started in "reverse"...meaning he knew what he wanted for a career path and what he wanted to study and that made it much easier for us to start...from there we narrowed the search to those schools....the academy sold itself...first to our son, and then gradually to us, me included. Have no doubt we challenged his decision several times....and insisted he do an overnight stay at his final 5 college selections....but in the end it was obvious where his first choice was and where he wanted to go and (with the help of LOTS of parents in the parents club and on this forum who answered what seemed to be endless questions) we climbed aboard too...
would love to tell you we found "peace of mind" along the way, however there is no end to a mothers worry....so lots of faith-lots of prayers-lots of support for our soon-to-be mid....its a growing and learning process for everyone....but in my opinion, the parents job is to empower our kids to decide their own destiny...give them the right tools and enough information to make an informed choice...its your life, not ours....and so whatever road gets chosen, so be it....over time the hesitation and fear turns to an overwhelming sence of pride...and we will remain his biggest fans and strongest supporters, barr none.....
so have faith...
find what road YOU want to travel...make sure you look and consider everything you can...and then have faith that your parents will climb aboard as well...in time!
best of luck~GO NAVY!</p>
<p>TUVA 137 - If possible visit the USNA (or any academy), talk with the admissions office personnel and the Midshipmen or Cadets. If you are near a college that will play one of the academies in football contact the academy and see if they will be holding an admissions briefing prior to the game. This is typical when they play in a major metropolitan area that is far away from the academy. Go with your parents and let them see the presentations and talk with the Midshipmen or Cadets that are there. Have your parents contact the nearest Parent Club and visit at their next meeting. The academies also host admissions briefings around the holidays in major metropolitan areas with Midshipmen or Cadets there to answer questions. You can never get enough information. Notice that I did not tie any of these opportunities to only USNA if it is more convenient to attend an event related to another academy, then check them out also. I believe that you will find a common thread, the Midshipmen or Cadets will be among the finest young men and women you would ever want to meet. They all come from strong, supportive families. The difference in the academies is geographic (academy location) and each is geared to support their respective branches, and therefore offer different career choices. Get them supportive of the idea of attending a service academy if that is your goal, then hone in on your choice.</p>
<p>Tuva
i don't know how much this post will actually help (if at all) but I will throw my two cents in. After having two kids in college now, daughter a Plebe at USMA and a son a senior at USC (yes, the REAL one in Southern California :) ) I will say that in the final analysis, the only one who needs to be convinced is you. First, it has to be assumed that your parents love you and want you to be successful and happy with your life. Much about parents expectations are centered around, yep, you guessed it, THEIR expectations, not necessarily yours. Your first job isn't necessarily to convince them, but to get your appointment first. Having a back-up plan by applying to other civilian colleges (either through ROTC or not) is only prudent and only increases your options (and shows your parents that you have a plan). Get the acceptance letters first, line up your choices, then go to work on your folks. Bringing a parent's "peace of mind" with the decision to go to a service academy may not ever be totally possible, we are after all, parents--we worry, hope, second-guess, pray, etc etc etc, that things will be all right, but we know we can never be certain about anything---we just want to know that our kids are exactly where THEY want to be. Good luck with that appointment! Showing them that you can successfully follow-thru with such a challenging application process will tell them a lot.</p>
<p>Tuva:</p>
<p>My initial reaction to your post is that this is your choice, not your parents. While your parents' support would be great, you really don't need their approval to complete the USNA application process.</p>
<p>From an early post, you indicated that you are already enrolled in college. So, to a certain extent, you are on your own already.</p>
<p>I concur with Shogun. Get your paperwork in order for USNA and see what happens. Given your earlier knee injury, it would be helpful for you to know if you will be able to pass the DODMERB physical.</p>
<p>Good luck.</p>
<p>Tuva: what are your parent's primary objections? I ask because there could be many different answers to that question. I doubt that it is the first class education or free tuition that bothers them :)</p>
<p>Is it that your parents do not want you in the military because they are afraid for your safety? In that case, you may need to make it clear that you are planning to choose a military career with or without the Academy. You don't need their approval to join the military, and you would be wise to apply for ROTC in any case both to prove your commitment to the Academy and to have a "fall-back" if you don't get in. Once they see that your career decision, they may come to understand that the USNA experience is the best preparation for success you could possible get. </p>
<p>On the other hand, are they supportive of you serving in the military but fearful of the intensity of the Academy experience? In that case, you need to update their understanding of what life is like at the Academy these days. A visit to the Academy is important. Perhaps the most valuable thing would be to set up some interviews with Academy graduates. Your BGO can help with this. If you know someone who works on a local base, they could arrange a day to meet with officers -- most are delighted to spend some time with a prospective applicant. I had the opportunity through a friend who worked on a base to meet with several USNA graduates when my kid started down this path and it was incredible! Once I saw first hand what amazing people each and every one of these graduates was (and that they were still "normal" in all the good ways :) I fully understood the draw of the Academy to my kid. </p>
<p>Finally, is their concern that the Academy experience puts limitations on their access to you, time with you, etc.? That is hard for parents but only at at first. As discussed on this board before, most of us will say we are far closer emotionally to our mids than we are to our kids who have gone to civilian college. See if you can get some interaction with parents of current mids or graduates. I'm sure this can be arranged through your state parent's club. And believe me, I worry more about my kids who are away at civilian college or living alone in a distant city than I do about my mid.</p>
<p>If you are proactive in taking steps like these hopefully they will see how motivated and serious you are. By proactive I mean: YOU make the phone calls, YOU set up the interviews, YOU lead them to understanding your motivation. If you're going to survive the Academy, you need to be ready to take full control of your life. My advice is to talk it through with them and then SHOW them that you are making this decision as the competent adult that they raised.</p>
<p>Good luck!</p>
<p>Tuva - it sounds as if you have a great relationship with your parents and want them to be supportive. Communicate with them - express your wants, goals and needs; and find out what their concerns are. As someone who has witnessed the devastation that armed combat can bring on both a physical and emotional level - I have real concerns (as only a mother or father can) about what life after the academy will bring. However, as I support my son in his effort to gain admission to USMA I know that my fears should have no bearing on his decision. Open communication and access to as much information as possible is key. Good luck! I have nothing but respect for all of the young men and women who make the awesome commitment to serve their country in the armed forces.</p>
<p>Any advice that undermines the student's relationship with his/her parents is a mistake. These kids who want to go through the process of getting into the academies or ROTC need as much love and support as possible. I believe that educating yourself and your parents as much with as much information as is available will help significantly. Find people to talk with who have served, visit where you can and read as much as you can about it. Just keep talking to your parents in a mature and informed manner and this will go a long way. I am sorry to keep rambling but if the student models an adult thought process, the parents a likely to listen have respect for the childs decision.</p>
<p>Tuva - How great to have this wealth of great advice. Being an academy parents is tough. And I might be the minority here. We never had any concerns or doubts. May have been due to the fact that our son was 4 years NJROTC and had this goal from the beginning. He was always bringing home literature and had us forever researching on the websites. The more we learned, the more we said "What an opportunity! We want you to try for it!" Everyone's common theme is to have your parents seek information which you will have to be the provider of. You can help them realize that you are looking for a more challenging education & more opportunities. Finding a Mid to introduce to your folks would be wise as well. Does your college host an Academy day? We attended one which set our minds at ease. Look for one of those somewhere in your state. Ours was put on by our senator. You can pick up everything you need to know there on any academy and speak with all of their representatives. They also had great films to watch which led me to tell my kid that he wasn't applying to West Point! LOL That whole gassing thing got me! JUST JOKING....maybe.....Good luck in this adventure.</p>
<p>All great comments, but think that parental support is important along the entire journey. One commented that you should get the appointment first and then lay the choices down. That is easier said than done in most instances as the path to an appointment is often very difficult and trying. We live in a very competitive district in a large state. So nominations from the U.S. Senators are extremely competive and the U.S. Representative's application package must include a letter of parental consent. So in that case lack of parental support would derail the process, as no nomination equals no appointment.</p>