I like to think that we tried to maintain a realistic balance between prestige/fit/cost. Certainly we targeted school that DDs were academically qualified for and that pretty much ruled out anything much below the USNWR rank #50. Yes, I encouraged my DDs to apply to schools in the #50 - #110ish range, although they could just as easily applied to lower ranked “less prestigious” schools and been happy. When decisions arrived we encouraged them to think seriously about the best choice and may have nudged them more towards a higher ranked, more nationally recognized school. Ultimately, DD2016 did not choose her highest ranked school; which I think was Purdue or her 2nd highest, Pitt; or even the most “prestigious” LAC that accepted her, College of Wooster. Nor did she pick her lowest ranked schools, Seton Hall or Quinnipiac. But she is happy at Marquette (which was ranked 86 ish I think). DD2018 is also probably not going to select the most “prestigious” of her choices either and will land somewhere in the middle of her pack too.
As much as we might want to believe that prestige doesn’t matter, it does, just ask my DD2018 when she is explaining for the 100th time where Marquette is to people in her home state of Texas.; or explaining to HS classmates and teachers why she picked Marquette over Purdue or A&M. I am sure these same questions will follow her into the workforce until she can establish herself, separate from the school she attended!
In the end, it is my DDs’ decision where they attend. No, I don’t feel that their inability to gain admission to the “prestigious” HPYS(s) of the world is a reflection on me. They are responsible for their grades and choices. Yes, I would have been disappointed if they had decided to attend our local community college, but only because I know that our circumstances are such they needn’t limit themselves in that manner.
Of course, prestige is a factor. Being full pay, I figured that only the HYPMS type schools would be worth it based on their prestige out in the real world. I wanted her to pick one of them for her longshot early application. She chose Stanford (which was the best choice for her for many reasons) and was rejected REA. Now she’s focused on fit and schools with big merit scholarships. We’ll see what happens in March. If I had another kid with the same stats, I’d do the same thing.
I have an “average excellent” daughter who has stats and ECs to compete for most schools. She looked at lots of great schools. Prior to applocations she read Debt Free U and that was it. She decided that she was going to focus on state schools with honors programs and great merit. Honestly, if she would have been accepted to a tippy top dream and begged to go we probable would have found a way even though it would have been financially imprudent. She’ll most likly be attending UCF as a National Merit Scholar. So she’ll be full ride, in a dual degree program taylored to her interests and she’s very excited.
Not at all. Prestige means absolutely nothing for undergrad. Once you have your first job all the undergrad degree is is a checkbox on a form. All that matters is your performance. I’ve been a hiring manager for 30+ years. No one cares.
Prestige was a small factor in D1s decisions on where to apply but cost and fit were the overriding considerations. D2 had no interest in prestige. She knew where she wanted to go and it was only Dad who asked her to apply to more than one school. She is at her first choice. @labegg our Ds are from the same year and I think have the same goals. My D was also accepted to Purdue but chose what I believe is your alma mater. Purdue because of scholarships and financial aid surprisingly would have been a few hundred dollars cheaper but she knew where she wanted to attend.
I think that for many prestige is more of a factor in choosing where to apply than where to attend. By the time decision time rolls around other factors become very real and more important.
@TheGreyKing , I like your candor, but I don’t agree that most people on CC are looking at tippy tops. After spending four years on this site, I would say that most people are primarily trying to navigate the process. There are definitely some people who are obsessed with prestige. But look at the financial aid forum, and the huge number of parents who are looking for merit, and the huge number of kids who are worried they won’t get into any college. I think perhaps the most long running thread on CC must be Colleges for the Jewish B student, and related threads.
Perhaps the reason we all notice the posters who are prestige hunting is because they are often totally delusional, or totally spectacular. Interestingly, there’s a spectacular student right now on CC who is not happy at his/her mega-tippy top college and is thinking of transferring. He/She was spoiled for choice, too. I will be interested to follow his/her progress, and I hope he/she either finds a way to stay at the current school, or finds a school he/she can be happy at. (Trying to create a little anonymity for the student.)
I think for my son (and his parents) we thought a lot about academics, fit, and then finally cost. So he figured out what he believes he wanted to study (business/economics) and then selected schools that met his criteria: located in cities or great college towns, good running program, etc. Acceptances/rejections came in and then we looked at fit and cost. The reality is that prestige (which for us are stronger schools academically) definitely came into play. It wasn’t the driving factor but he definitely chose the stronger school academically for what he wanted to study.
I think the nuanced conversation is how we define “prestige”. My son was a good student at a killer public high school but he was not HYPMS bound. We never had the feeling that he had to go to certain schools in order to have a good life and for me to brag to all my friends. (That doesn’t happen in my crowd but certainly does in our town amongst the testing families.) He just wanted to be pushed academically and have lots of options after he graduates.
I know families who are totally focused on the top Ivies and do ridiculous things to achieve admission. In my experience, this tends to be cultural, with a parent or two who are immigrants and not aware of alternatives, or who come from a very class-divided culture and see HYPMS as a sign of class, or entry to higher class.
Prestige was not a factor for us but the incredible financial aid at some top schools was. And the excellence in a particular area of study, which of course is available in many schools if a family really researches.
Hey, if my kid doesn’t like it at Stanford, here we come Univ of South Carolina Honors. I wonder if they will offer again some merit scholarship? He was offered an automatic Liebers for being NMF and Coopers, but I wonder if these won’t be offered again for transferees? If not, he will transfer to UCLA because he’s actually more qualified or deserving after his gap year of studying language abroad. We never thought our kid was bound for HYPSM either because a top UC was his realistic goal. Frankly, for me there is around three colleges I will/might pay full pay for our non-STEM kid if he thought it would be a good fit. I actually wanted my kid to get one or two Ds and Fs for character building until I realized that might mean saying bye-bye to UCLA.
Finances, fit, and prestige, in that order (out of necessity). But, prestige is subjective and test scores determine where your student falls. Prestige for my D was top 20 LACs, not HPYS, where she was accepted to a couple but they couldn’t pass the finances test. In the end she got some great packages from the 21-50 LACs, not what we would call prestigious but maybe someone whose scores were lower might think so. Funny story though…when applying in 2015 the school she attends was ranked a mid-40s LAC, it is now ranked in the low 20s and currently a “hot” school. So her high safety school is now a solid match. No question she is among her peers and she is having a great experience.
Admittedly, I asked her to take a few schools off her initial list because I didn’t think she would be challenged. They were schools I had never heard of, not bad schools by any means, but not household names either. But, that had more to do with academic fit than anything else.
@BorgityBorg judging by the comments on this thread, twoinanddone is in the minority about being hung up on prestige. I think a lot of the posters in Chance Me, change their minds along the journey, and agree they’re mostly students. I’m with you, and the majority of the commenters. Fit, both financial and otherwise, is what’s important.
@“Iron Maiden” I agree that grad school prestige would matter more than undergrad, but doesn’t undergrad prestige matter at least somewhat in getting into a prestigious grad program?
That’s what we are currently considering. Fit and finances of course, with an eye toward grad school (PhD not professional).
And the prestige we are considering is more for people in the know, those making the grad school decisions, not the general public who has only heard of a handful of schools: Ivies, Stanford, and big sports schools.
Not quite sure what you are asking here. Are you asking if prestige, as in bragging rights, were a factor? Or if, as Blossom states, academic rigor which tends to be correlated with prestige, is important? Are you saying prestige as in my kid can only go to the top 20? Or that I encouraged my student to go to the best fit academically as well as financially?
It would be a bit disingenuous for most that post here to say that prestige, in the sense of wanting an academically good college, was not a factor. Most of the students of parents on this forum could have gotten a free ride or close to it, at a second or third tier school (and by that I mean an actual second tier school ranked below say 150 on USNWR not a school ranked in the 30s or 40s) and do not follow the money. Of course academic quality is important to most.
So on that front, I will say yes prestige (as in good academics) did matter. My kids did not go to top 20 schools, but they also did not take the full ride at schools where academics were weak. So no bragging rights, but also not the cheapest alternative.
I define “prestige” as perceived value by employers or graduate programs, which didn’t necessarily correlate to a higher ranking. We avoided schools with a strong party scene/unruly study body or had the stigma of lacking rigor. DD’s list had equal number of reaches (admit rates under 20%), matches (admit rates 20-50%) and safeties (admit rates over 50%).
Our impression of reputation was totally un-scientific and arbitrary. We consumed information written about the school in news accounts as well as what was promoted in their “student life/campus life” webpages/Youtube and by word-of-mouth from friends and friend’s kids who studied there and gave us honest eyewitness accounts. I also (unfairly) evaluated the tour guide and touring cohort as a proxy for the student body. If she didn’t fit in among the touring applicant pool, then she probably isn’t going to fit in at the school if she got in.
for our financial situation, “prestige” and “affordability” went hand-in-hand. the highest-ranked schools would give the most generous aid, and S was in the ballpark for stats, so we applied to 6 reaches, got 2 acceptances with 4 waitlist, and chose Duke over Northwestern. so he is attending a great school a convenient 2 hour drive away, and receiving very generous need-based aid (a big chunk of which is labeled “scholarship” but we know better)
that being said, he was much more focused on prestige than we were. the first app I had him send was Alabama to secure the full-tuition scholarship. we got the UAH near-full-ride locked in too. he would not consider our local school ECU even though he might have gotten paid to go there. he did not want to pursue what I thought would be a full ride at Ole Miss. he also shot down Nebraska and Miss St which likely would have offered very generous merit. NC State’s final aid package made them very affordable too. I would have been happy with NC State, Ole Miss, Alabama, UAH but of course I am delighted he got into Duke.
frankly my big mistake was having him apply for the big competitive scholarships at Ohio State, Michigan State, South Carolina, Kentucky. he missed them all and though he got good lesser scholarships, none of them would have been as affordable as NC State. it would have been better to target more reach schools but in the end we got our #1 choice.
My Dad was a professor so he understood that the name of the school didn’t matter as much as the work that the student does, so he applied zero pressure to attend a fancy name. I went to a CTCL for undergrad and eventually ended up in some high-powered grad programs and a successful professional career. My own kids are a few years away from college choices. I will steer them from prestige mania and recommend that they look at the state flagship and the local LACs, depending on what kind of school looks best for their strengths and needs.
Isn’t that becoming more true in the US than many will admit, because some types of “elite” highly paid jobs (Wall Street, management consulting) primarily recruit from super-selective colleges? Given the steadily growing inequality in how economic gains are distributed, many families already at the top want their kids to stay there, while many others* want their kids to have a higher chance of moving up to there.
*Including those who, on these forums, do not qualify for need-based financial aid anywhere, but see themselves as “only” middle-class.
