I am not in a good place at the moment. I am stressed and I have so much anxiety lately about college recruiting as I am a student athlete.
I am a 2018 high school graduate and around the middle of July, a school has offered me a full ride for the spring of 2018.
I was iffy about starting in the spring because I am going to be a senior and my high school’s first semester doesn’t finish until the end of January and their spring semester starts in the beginning of January. Also, I may not have the course credits to finish high school and become NCAA eligible then.
I still went to the school because I have heard how great their program was (private small school but ranked decently in the sport I am playing in and has decent education), however, I do not find or see myself as a fit. My parents liked it and wanted me to join their school as it was one of the options in hand, but I told them I would think about it. After meeting the coach, my parents were frustrated with my choice (even yelled, scolded and banged their fists) and forced me to send a text to the coach saying I wanted to “join the team” (in other words to commit), which I then did.
I later believe that it was a big mistake because other schools cannot approach me due to ethics and my personal coach cannot help me as I am committed verbally. I talked to my parents because I was frustrated and then they have told me that in the end it’s what I want and if I really don’t like going to the school I was committed to then I should decommit and find another school, however it has to be a FULL RIDE or at least 90%.
Before they figured I was committed, a school that I really liked said they had a 2018 spot for the fall but it was only going to be ranging from 65-close to full ride scholarship. And I recently heard from a friend that a school (that I also have interest in) has decided to de-commit a player from a 2018 fall spot (so now there is one more spot left).
The head coach from where I have verbally committed to told me that (head coach) is done recruiting the 2018 class. I know that de-committing from a school after a verbal commit is bad enough but at this point I do not know what to do and need advice. Is it too late? How bad does it look if I de-commit? Do I still have a chance?
How would you feel about the school to which you have committed if you could start in the fall of '18, rather than spring of '18? I don’t see how you can start in January when you will not have graduated high school yet–the NCAA is pretty clear on that point. Assuming you are not NCAA-eligible spring '18, would the same offer be available for fall of '18?
I don’t know what sport you are talking about, but I have seen countless examples of coaches speaking with athletes who were verbally committed somewhere else in several sports. There is certainly no prohibition against it. I also do not understand why your “personal coach” can’t help you. A verbal commitment is not in any way binding, and you can change at any point until you sign the NLI or show up to your first organized activity as an enrolled student.
I assume because you are talking about being a spring enrollee that you play a fall sport. If so, I assume the current offer will still hold for fall 18 if you don’t have the necessary credits?
I would not worry at all about"how bad it looks" to decommit. It is your life, your education and your career. Trust me the coach will get over it. That said, I would want to have some more specific discussions with other schools before pulling the plug. Best to have as much information as possible before making that kind of decision.
If you haven’t signed a NLI then there is nothing binding. I don’t see how there is any chance of you starting in Jan. 2018 anyway because it takes time to be NCAA certified. They have to wait on your final grades and with our daughter it was about a month to complete the process after she graduated. I’m not clear on your hesitancy with the program you are currently verbally committed to…is it the school itself or the timeline (starting in spring?). It is time to step back and decide what you want from a program and start contacting coaches. Good luck to you!
Can you tell us why you feel the school you committed to is not a fit? And maybe why the other school is a better fit? It might help us to understand how serious your concerns are.
Thank you for replying! I believe the school said that if I cannot play for the spring of 2018 then they could put me in the fall, however, I am unsure if it will be full. Despite this, I visited the school and to me I just don’t see myself a fit and I know a couple of other players that are local who went to the school and transferred later because they did not like the program (also it is a small school and very religious). As well, the spring program really bothers me because I also want to finish off my senior year.
I talked to a school and they said they could not approach me anymore because I have committed and it’s considered unethical and frowned upon if a different school has approached a player that has been verbally committed. However, if I would talk to other schools, would it seem alright?
The reason why I do not see myself as a fit to the school is that I am looking for a school that has a decent size number of people and diversity. As well as the sport I am playing in I am looking for the support.
Before I visited, I was so sure the school was the one. However, when I did, I stepped back because it was opposite of what I wanted it; it was a really small school, also very religious and the team goes on Sundays and Wednesdays to preach (I rather go on my own time). The support was also very small.
Usually, when people go visit they would say that this school is it for them and it’s where they can imagine themselves being in. For me, I just don’t see that.
The other schools that I have yet to visit has at least a population of 30 000 and has a greater diversity. Also a really great program for the team.
First, talk to your parents and work out whether you can complete your senior year. Tell them you want to stay in high school for the spring and that you don’t think you can be NCAA eligible by the spring anyway. I don’t think you can get a scholarship if you aren’t eligible (but check on that). If you aren’t eligible and can’t get a scholarship for the spring, that ends that.
At that point, you can reopen negotiations. Be clear with the school you were planning on attending. Tell them you just need more time and want to talk to a few other schools because you are unsure of the fit. They may not be willing to extend the offer through the fall, but that’s their choice.
Many coaches poach recruits. Some don’t, but many do. My daughter had a lot of D3 schools call her after she’d committed and tell her she could still play D3 even if she’d signed an NLI. They didn’t care that she’d committed. I think I’d respect the coach who told you he wouldn’t talk to you while you were committed, but if you reopen recruitment, he may be willing to talk to you.
No, it is called decommitting when a student has said he was going to School A and then decides he wants to go elsewhere. Any ‘commitment’ before officially signing a NLI can be withdrawn. Schools do it too, so it isn’t just a one sided act.