After visiting both campuses, I honestly was disgusted by the preppy-stuck up culture that seemed to permeate Princeton. As a result, I have decided to attend Columbia. However, my parents (with name value being all they care) vehemently oppose this (with the claim that, “if you are going to study at the library every day, why does social life matter. Princeton degree is worth more.”) I do understand Princeton is academically and socially more regarded (easier to get banking jobs, etc.), but I absolutely refuse to ever step back on the Princeton campus. Heck, politically, I am much more similar to a Princeton student, but I’m willing to go to Columbia just to avoid that social culture. How can I convince my parents to take their eyes off of the fact that Columbia might be ranked a bit lower, but offers an equally competitive education?
P.S. Parents also want me to give my siblings Princeton legacy so they’ll get in easier (Columbia doesn’t count legacy as much). Everyone I know around me is pretty much pushing Princeton as well (“Princeton is sooooo much better! Why go to CU?!?!?”)
P.P.S. Fin aid is same at both institutions. 18000 family responsibility a year. Columbia gave me A LOT of money
There’s no such thing as sibling legacy.
Are your parents recent immigrants? Would they respect your guidance counselor’s opinion? Is there a religious leader who may be able to tell them that both are equally good?
What major are you thinking of?
@MYOS1634 Yeah, low key abusive (verbally more so than physically though).
After gaining admission to Princeton and Columbia (combined with the fact they are Asian parents), they started being really nice to me (psychos) because they can now brag about their son being a student at HYPS. Scenario changed totally yesterday when I dropped the bomb that I wanted to go to Columbia, with my dad and mom going bezerk again. My mom threatened that she’ll commit suicide due to shame if I go to Columbia (and that she’ll never support me if I go to Columbia). My dad was a bit more adamant surprisingly (my mom was going to pay for college anyway, so he didn’t really care. However, he’s very visibly angry right now.
Pretty much this is how it went
Horrible parents that rag on and emotionally abuse their son for getting rejected by UChicago. Life is miserable
I want to EDII to Vandy to get over with college crap
Parents "literally" beat me (verbally) and fight me to get me out of it
I get into Vandy anyway with full tuition
Parents are like, "meh, at least you got full tuition"
I get in to three Ivies (Dartmouth, Princeton, Columbia). They start acting super nice to me and brag to all their friends I am going to Princeton
@MYOS1634 My mom is really emotionally unstable and she’s fallen into some kind of cult as well (she used to be religious, but started going to it b/c of her friends. Apparently she and her friends prayed yesterday to “God” to change my mind). I feel really bad for her honestly. I thought she trusted me and crap (apparently according to her, it was b/c she thought I would get rejected everywhere and she was “playing nice”), but when the time came, she turned out to be unsupportive as well and gaslighted me no differently compared to my father.
I really really really really really hate Princeton. I CANNOT imagine myself their for 4 years and I REFUSE to attend that school. Thinking about my sh*tty situation honestly makes me want to cry. My whole family (including my younger brother, who thinks I am “stupid” to be passing off a chance of a lifetime) is against me. NO ONE cares about my happiness. Just bragging. Just using me as their pawn. Just using me to gain an edge. They may claim it is for my future (2nd highest income earners are at Pton, etc.) but honestly I’d go to Columbia and be poor than go to Princeton, be unhappy and sad, and be rich eventually
MIsinformed Asian parents are also pushing me to do CS/Woody Woo at Pton. What a shame.
@AroundHere
I’d rather kill myself than go to Princeton honestly. Princeton reminds me of really , really bad things that I’ve experienced in life (preppy culture mainly). I’d take loans probably. My parents did stipulate if I am named as a Core Scholar or a Core Curriculum Prize at Columbia, they will take the bill and pay. If not, 100% on me
tl;dr
Princeton felt a bit too preppy and white. Scratch that. VERY preppy and white except for a couple pocket clubs. WHY DO YOU NEED TO APPLY TO EAT.
Columbia on the other hand felt more “wholesome” and proper. Great fit IMO
^ Do I recall that you were also a UVA Echols Scholar? It seems to me that you have been all over the place this college application season… I would suggest you find a counselor that can offer you some guidance. I mean this constructively, not critically, but strangers on the internet are unlikely to offer any advice that will be effective for you. Congratulations on several amazing acceptances.
You cannot take more than 5500 in loans without a cosigner with a good credit rating.
If you didn’t like the idea of joining an eating club, why did you apply to Princeton?
@AroundHere Parents forced me to apply to H/Y/P/S. I didn’t want to. I got rejected from S, waitlisted from H, and accepted to P. They want me to go to P. At least they spared Yale (I withdrew because I never wanted to go there. Parents were livid for a while until I got into P). They never supported me applying to Columbia honestly
My best friend is currently a freshman at Princeton (her sister just graduated too) and they are far from preppy. There is always going to be a dominant culture at a school, for Princeton it may be preppiness and for Columbia it’s very liberal. If you really hate it, don’t go (and figure out how you’re going to pay for Columbia) but college is what you make of it and I can guarantee you that you’ll find your niche wherever you go. Choosing the place where you will be happiest is always important, and if that ends up being Columbia I’m sure your parents will eventually come around
@colhopeful443 Columbia liberalness is pretty overstated from my experience with the students. Most are apathetic to left leaning. However, both sides of extremists are loud–very loud
@Dankjewel my parents have been professors at Columbia for the past 25 years so I’ve seen a lot of students come and go. Not saying that there isn’t a decently sized conservative population on campus but the school is overwhelmingly liberal, especially when you factor in all of the Barnard women.
columbia is a fantastic school… heck, it’s the third most selective university in the nation right behind stanford and harvard. (columbia was more selective than princeton last year, and princeton tied with columbia this year.) they should be very proud of you for being accepted to both and dartmouth. i can’t imagine why anyone’s parents would act the way yours are acting… my support goes out to you.
if your parents won’t pay for columbia, is there not anything you like about princeton? think about it: you could be going to school with chloe kim! (just trying to lighten the mood, lol.)
@Publisher They said they’ll disown me if I try to transfer. They want me going Princeton for 4 years. I am considering transferring to UChicago regardless
(just trying to lighten the mood, lol.)